Tag: drinking

Fox Doc Keith Ablow Being A Jerk To All The Lazy, Potted-Up Millennials. That Is Wonkette’s Job!

Snotnosed Millennial brat thinks "Dr." Keith Ablow is not even the boss of him, whatever.
Oh, we get it, it's about date rape-type stuff!

People Seem To Think Bud Light Slogan Is Rapey, Just Because It’s Really Rapey

Earth's most generic light beer, Bud Light, has been doing an ad campaign that they think is oh so hip, lately, to try to get beer-pong playing, dildo-brained college kids to upgrade from Natty Light and drink THEIR piss...
President Ted Cruz (R-Not Really)

Ted Cruz’s Underage Drinking Is The Only Thing We Like About Him

Yesterday, Buzzfeed reported that prominent Canadian gag gift Sen. Ted Cruz pled guilty to possession of alcohol as a minor in 1987. He was but a little Cruzlet in high school shortpants when he got pulled over (racially profiled?)...

Jon Stewart Mocks Sean Hannity’s ‘Shocking’ Expose of Spring Break Debauchery (Video)

Here's Jon Stewart with the only reasonable response to the full week of coverage that Fox News's Sean Hannity gave to the alleged horrors of Spring Break: "You will believe what they found, because you know" -- drinking, sex,...

Air Force General Was Fired For Being A Drunken Boor, Not Because Obama Was Trying To Nuke South Carolina

It does the heart good, it does -- knowing that even in this media-saturated, "professionalized" age, there are still manly men who are willing to say "Screw protocol, I'm going on a bender." Men like USAF Major General Michael...

Celebrate The 80th Anniversary Of The Repeal Of Prohibition In Style With Your Happy and Wonkette Writers

Today is a great day in American history, a day that ranks up there with July 4th and whatever day the Constitutional Convention was held and Christmas and that day you take off in the middle of August when...
Tucker, I said no karate chops in the office

Ann Coulter Writes Book, Risks Liberal Contamination by Visiting Washington DC

Ann Coulter wrote a book. It’s her tenth! Congratulations, Ann! We don’t know much about the etiquette of these things, but evidently the tenth is the “fluorescent” anniversary in publishing, since her friends at the Daily Caller invited everyone...

This Friendly Republican Will Help Us All Get Drunk At The Democratic Convention

What is the best part of being in town at national political conventions? Seeing the speeches in person? Meeting an array of interesting activists? No, those are the worst parts -- the best part is getting wasted and flopping...

Meanwhile, In Congress, A Veritable Donnybrook Erupts Over Libations

Oops, it's Friday, better check in on our beloved 112th Congress to see if they did anything (please god, spare us) or even showed up this week. Good heavens... fisticuffs? "One congressman accused another of drinking on the job...

Liveblogging the Sorry State of the Union! Which Is Still Around!

Yo yo yo! We are not hosting a children's Game of Thrones-themed birthday party with Obama as the entertainment/clown, as this picture might indicate. But we ARE conveying to you the state of the State of the Union of...

Hmm: Andrew Breitbart Gets Really Defensive About His Alcohol Use

Score one for random chance: for the first time in the long history of C-SPAN, something interesting actually happened on air! Democracy's best friend Andrew Breitbart (he's also best friends with truth and journalistic ethics; pick one, Andy!) was...

Photos: America Pounds Beers In Celebration At Ground Zero

Last night, Americans heard the news about Osama bin Laden and flocked to the site where the World Trade Center once stood. And they arrived on this hallowed ground, they held up signs, tried to get themselves on teevee,...

Christmastime Means a District of Drunken Cretins

One thing I noticed the other night, while watching a girl stumble out of Tom Tom and fall headfirst into a cop car, is that people in DC sure do love to get drunk! Not that residents of other...

Bush Reveals How To Become President: Just Quit Boozin’

The revelations from George W. Bush's blockbuster graphic novel, Stuff I Did, continue to slam America when it is most vulnerable and butt-hurt. For example, the longest serving president of the 21st Century (really, so far!) says he would've...

Eleanor Holmes Norton Invites Stephen Colbert To Binge Drink With Her

This is irresponsible and encourages America's young people to drink alcohol until they are poisoned: D.C. Delegate Eleanor Holmes Norton has issued a challenge to Stephen Colbert: See if you can handle "Eleanor's Revenge." Norton—who has an ongoing feud with...

A Semi-Comprehensive Guide To PBR

What better drink to enjoy when you and yours snuggle on the couch to watch some good old-fashioned queeran burning this Saturday? PBR, of course! A beer that reminds us that good things can come from Real America. Whether...