dream act
Mitt Romney Drops By To Make Sure You Still Loathe Him
Mitt Romney was lonely. A week after the election, and all anybody was laughing at was Karl Rove and Fox News and Dick Morris and Gallup, and people had kind of forgotten Mitt himself, the onetime standard-bearer of the GOP. Had he himself not shit the bed? Was he not the master of his own [...]
Hero Gov Jan Brewer Protects Arizona From Scourge Of DREAM Act Kids Getting Drivers Licenses
Well HI Arizona, what are you doing to be the greatest state in the union today? In one corner, we have Louisiana, which allows your child to learn about the Loch Ness monster in science class (except if your child is Islamic, and thus doesn’t deserve to learn about the Loch Ness monster), and in another [...]
Obama Outrageously Politicizes 4th Of July Naturalization Ceremony By Mentioning Immigration
One of the nicer Independence Day traditions in this country is the swearing-in of new citizens by the President of the USA. Jaded though we may be in this modern age of instant worldwide communications, 24-hour news cycles, and flying robotic kittycat death drones, we nevertheless actually get a little misty-eyed at the idea that, [...]
Ronald Reagan’s Other Son Says New Immigration Order Baby-Rapes Latinos
Michael “The Other One” Reagan has an eloquent column out today in “The Cagle Post” and it is so thoughtful and wise! Basically, Barack Nobama is Jerry Sandusky, child-raping Latinos, by changing immigration enforcement priorities for DHS and ICE. Let’s see: blah blah blah “Emperor Obama, Constitution, minions, bureaucrats, swatting pesky flies, Stalin-times-Idi Amin” … [...]
Your American Dreams Are A Virus Against America
Do you have dreams, Wonkette commenters? I totally had one the other night about–wait, you want news? Oh, fine. Turns out Kickstarter is even worse than we thought! According to this article, it is destroying the economy because everyone is following their dreams. Yes, really. [Slate] Speaking of dreams, Obama said young immigrants won’t be [...]
Sundays With Jamie Kilstein And The Lord: Anchor Babies Away!
Republicans are mad at Mexican lover Barack Obama because he wants to temporarily not destroy the lives of brown people who have lived in America pretty much their whole life by renditioning them to a country they have never lived in so they can starve in a lonely wasteland of fear. Go get em GOP! [...]
Mitt Romney Loses His Cool
We think this might have been how Bing Crosby looked when he got too much Scotch in him and started beating on his wife and kids. What brings the scary early scenes of The Stepfather out of mild-mannered Mittens? QUESTIONS! Questions about gay marriage, and children of undocumented workers getting in-state tuition, and medical marijuana, [...]
Senate Votes To Repeal DADT In John McCain’s Face
Hooray, John McCain’s insane Obama-spite mission to keep gay soldiers from admitting they’re gay soldiers is over, because the cloture vote has succeeded on the latest attempt at repeal of Don’t Ask, Don’t Tell. It is absolutely ridiculous that it took this long for members of our armed forces to attain basic human rights, but [...]
Insurance Is Just Another Word For Slavery
Ayn Rand’s rotting corpse is feeling SO GOOD right now, since Americans are once again free to forego health insurance and force all the other poors to pay for it! [Forbes] Instead of this “insurance,” Americans should be forced to buy guns, presumably to blow their brains out when they’re afflicted with a horrifying disease. [...]
House Passes DREAM Act, Which Will Kill All White People
The House passed the DREAM Act last night for some reason, even though it will certainly be filibustered in the Senate. But that’s not a knock on it. The House should feel free to pass stuff they think the Senate will filibuster. It seems like they may finally no longer be afraid of that giant [...]
Government Seizes All of Glenn Beck’s Precious Gold
An activist California judge legislating from the bench has frozen the assets of Superior Gold Group, one of many NASCAR gold coin dealers who advertise The Solution to Weimar Hyper Inflation on Glenn Beck’s satanic teevee program. According to lawyers, Superior Gold Group “took payments from customers and never provided the gold ordered, charged prices [...]
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