SHOW US THE DOODLES: “A massive archive of Clintonian doodles exists somewhere. In the absence of any other information, a reasonable person might easily conclude that President Clinton’s doodles are so horrifying, so shocking, or so repulsive that it would ruin his legacy forever were they ever to be made public.” [NBC New York]

Here’s a nice drawing by the White House “Dean of Correspondents,” Helen Thomas, that you can buy for three figures on eBay. Or you can, you know, do anything else. But all of the money will be donated to sick people with… neurofibromatosis! So just buy it, now. [eBay]

From Benjamin Harrison’s subversive Eraserhead vs. Homestar Runner scribbles to Ronald Reagan’s cartoon world of pretend cowboys and sinister Chinamen, presidential doodles are an exciting new area of historical study for people who use an unread hardcover of Clinton’s “My Life” as an end table. Why piss away your career like Douglas Brinkley when you can learn everything about a prez from his notebook art and maybe a glance at his Wikipedia entry?

For example, a look at newly unveiled doodles by John F. Kennedy reveals a vast conspiracy involving his assassins and September 11, 2001:

Events long after his death give one doodle an unintended chill: A small circle with the numbers “9-11″ contained within. Just to the lower left on the page, the word “conspiracy” is underlined.

At his final Cabinet meeting before his assassination, he scribbled the word “poverty.” A weird example of JFK doodlery and yet another conspiracy, after the jump.

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We’ve previously touched on the recent book of Presidential doodles, but we were directed to the book’s website this morning, and now we have to buy the damn thing, because it looks hysterical. The picture above was drawn by Benjamin Harrison, who was, according to most contemporary accounts, a fully-functional adult at the time of this presidency. The book’s analysis of the doodle also deserves attention: MORE »

Upgraded from today’s Gossip Roundup because we never miss a chance to piss on graves, especially inexplicably revered ones. Look everyone, it’s Ronald Reagan’s doodles! MORE »