Wonkette

The tipsters have gotten themselves on the “good” list and uncle Wonk’d has loads of stocking stuffers for an early Christmas. These presents might not be as good as the ones Laura Bush was seen buying, but you get what you pay for. Unwrap a jaywalking John Bolton, an over-caffeinated Katherine Harris, an anatomically correct Anderson Cooper, and an occasionally anonymous Dan Bartlett that comes with elephant sidekick, under the tree.

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The American political elite are enviable in so many ways. Doesn’t everyone wish they had a really good-looking family, like Dick Gephardt’s? Or a culturally sensitive patriarch, like Karl Rove? Perhaps there is more admiration for our great athletes — like Yankees players Mike Mussina and Alex Rodriguez, who both have tons of fans — even if Jeff Gannon isn’t one. In any case, just sit back and have a beer like Tim Russert, or go Patrick Kennedy-style with an iced tea — there’s lots more wonk’d after the jump.

There’s no way that baseball hats and sunglasses can keep any celebs from getting wonk’d by you hardworking tipsters. Once you’ve discovered their charade, email us, with “Wonk’d” or “Sighting” in the subject line (and the name of the “brity” that should have known better). You keep a sendin’, we’ll keep a postin’, and they’ll keep pretendin’ to be surprised when they’re spotted.

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It’s so great to know that you tipsters are gaining in skill and guile when it comes to spotting celebs. Case and point: this photo of E.J. Dionne, blathering on about Bush’s approval rating in between slurps of Vietnamese satay pumpkin fusion soup.

Update: Several of you have identified Dionne’s lunchtime companion in this photo as former Clinton advisor William Galston, now at the Brookings Institution.

Regular Wonk’d stars George Stephanopoulos, Stephen Colbert, and Jenna Bush also make their appearances, as does Laura Bush. Of course, as in life there are always winners and losers in the game of Wonk’d. The loser of the week is John Kerry, who couldn’t win a presidential election, and now can’t even fix a traffic ticket. It’s good thing then that we’ve got Wonkette-poll-dominating Stormie Janzen — and tons more, after the jump.

This is the seat of power for the, uh, whole planet, and there are celebrities lurking everywhere. If you spot one, tell us by email, with “Wonk’d” or “Sighting” in the subject line (along with the name of the bold face you spotted). Spot and send, spot and send — many thanks!

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Today’s Wonk’d brings us Hu Jintao, guarded like the superpower leader that he is, and Chris Rock — also being guarded, but maybe for different reasons. Jenna Bush and friends were seen, shockingly, waiting their turn in line, but the guys from Franz Ferdinand had ladies waiting in line for them. Media elites Tucker Carlson and David Gregory, ignoring high gas prices, were fillin’ ‘er up. Also spotted: Chelsea Clinton, hiding behind the latest fashions; R. Kelly, trying to get himself in more trouble; and John Ashcroft, ACTUALLY TAKING THE METRO. We deliver what we promise, plus so much more, after the jump.

We love our tipsters and all your hilarious tips, so please keep sending them to us via email, with “Wonk’d” or “Sighting” in the subject line (along with the name of the spotted celeb). Thanks!

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So, you ladies want your own radio show?

We weren’t expecting too much when we were invited to a party at the XM Satellite Radio studios — big brick building in an ugly part of town, people not attractive enough for real radio, etc. — but the soirée was sponsored by Capitol File and it was for the spawn of Tim Russert, so it was packed fulla the media elite and their hangers-on, dressed in a confused amalgam of fancy and casual that DC still can’t quite pull off.

Still, we had a good time — mostly because the open bar was one the best-stocked we’ve seen so far (Makers! Beam Black! Turkey!), but also because James Carville kind of hit us on the shoulder and growled something unintelligible-but-maybe-threatening as he passed by us to refill his drink. Our full report, complete with exclusive pictures from Liz Gorman, Intrepid Girl Reporter, after the jump.

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* Reliable Source: Rep. Cynthia McKinney’s “original” statement about her run-in with a Capitol Hill officer said, “It is… a shame that while I conduct the country’s business, I have to stop and call the police to tell them that I’ve changed my hairstyle so that I’m not harassed at work.” McKinney has also noted that white officers are more likely than black officers to ask for her identification: “Some things never change — that’s what Tupac said.”. . . Bush called Bo Derek in 2000 to say, “Bo, let me just say that you and Josh [Bolten] together are a perfect 15.”. . . ABC is shooting a pilot for a show about “young hottie D.C. bureaucrats.” [WP]
* Inside the Beltway: Mayor of Bay St. Louis, Miss. attends Correspondents’ Association Dinner wearing shorts to display solidarity with hurricane victims. . . Donna Brazile as Cheney walks by: “Should I duck?”. . . John McLaughlin orders milk at the Morton’s bar, but has fruit punch instead. [WT]

Just because you’re famous, or famous-for-D.C., doesn’t mean you don’t need to buy stuff.

Actually, we take that back; it kinda does! Usually celebrities can have their household help or personal assistants do their shopping for them. But sometimes they buy their own stuff — and when they do, Wonk’d sightings are the hilarious result!

After the jump (click here), live vicariously through your fellow Wonkette readers, as they hit the supermarket with Bill Cosby, shop for electronics with Donna Brazile — and give Dick Cheney the finger.

(And please continue to email us with your sightings, with “Wonk’d” or “Sighting” in the subject line. Thanks!)

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* Reliable Source: Sen. Sam Brownback (R-Kan.) to Rolling Stone: “You look at the social impact of the countries that have engaged in homosexual marriage. You’ll know [Sweden] by their fruits.”. . . CNN throws farewell party for Robert Novak at the Palmer steakhouse; Pat Buchanan, Donna Brazile, Kate O’Beirne attended. [WP]
* Inside Politics: Sen. Patrick Leahy (D-Vt.) and Sen. Orrin Hatch (R-Utah) have “floor spat” over Alito. [WT]
* Lloyd Grove’s Lowdown: Arianna Huffington: “Inviting Tim Russert to keynote a conference on journalistic ethics is like having Jack Abramoff keynote a conference on lobbying reform.” [NYDN] MORE »

• Senate votes to extend the Patriot Act for six months. [WP, NYT]
• Senate approves $40b in budget cuts with Cheney casting tie-breaking vote; two Republicans and 42 Democrats block plan for drilling in ANWR with filibuster. Sen. John Kerry: “I’m confident we will see another debate on ANWR.” [WP, WP, WP, WP, NYT, LAT, USAT]
• FISA judges request briefing on eavesdropping program. [WP]
• Jack Abramoff inches closer to a plea deal. [NYT, LAT]
• Bush reaches out to black critics, suggesting “that the White House has not abandoned its political goal of trying to draw black voters from Democratic ranks”; Donna Brazile speaks highly of the president’s efforts. [NYT]
• Eavesdropping program is unlikely to be challenged in court because of its secrecy. [USAT]

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We’ve just laid eyes on the panel for TIME magazine’s “Person of the Year” luncheon on Nov. 14 — the first of many manufactured events in the build up to the POY cover, not the least of which is the cover itself. Say one thing for the panel, though: They didn’t stint on the Coopers:

-Brian Williams
-Anderson Cooper
-Grover Norquist
-TIME’s Matt Cooper
-Donna Brazile
-Cynthia Cooper (2002 Person of the Year for ‘The Whistleblowers’)

We’re happy to see budding novelist Matt Cooper on there, of course, since otherwise the luncheon would be lacking publicity for the magazine. Does this selection say anything about who might ultimately be the POY? Speculation after the jump.

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• Names & Faces: Is Lloyd Grove through at the New York Daily News? [WP]
• Under the Dome: Hillary roasts Rahm Emanuel: “Republicans may have the Hammer, but we have the Nutcracker! He has calves like Baryshnikov and a mouth like Cheney.”. . . Elizabeth Dole, Richard Burr, Bob Novak, Jerry Falwell, Orrin Hatch attend tribute to Jesse Helms. [The Hill]
• Inside the Beltway: Congressional staffers enjoy hemp feast. [WT]
• Cindy Adams: Donna Brazile: “I’m an African-American whose life has been a victory. But then came Katrina. . . Right now we need a president who will help. He’s helping. I’m so grateful. Poverty and misery is humbling. I’m humbled to the core that this administration is helping the poorest of the poor. . . I applaud this president for stepping up.” [NYP]
• Rush & Molloy: Bette Midler booed at Madison Square Garden Katrina fundraiser for joking, “George Bush likes my music. He came to see me in the ’70s. A coke dealer of mine got him some tickets.” [NYDN]
• Lloyd Grove’s Lowdown: 9/11 activist mothers call for tough investigation into Katrina response. Kristen Breitweiser: “This time, there’s got to be accountability. If you’re an elected official, you should be inviting accountability for yourself.” [NYDN]