Tag: donations

The Top Ten Posts Of 2015 Will Tongue-Kiss You At Midnight, Since Nobody Else Will

Hooray, it's midnight! But only if you live in the time zone where it is midnight. If you don't live there, like say for instance maybe you live in "Luxembourg" or the "Mountain Time Zone," two places that may or...
By the time you see this, I will have had my first Crimmus!

Anna Duggar Wants You To Read Your Weekly Top Ten

Happy day after Christmas, Wonk-Wonks! Did Santa bring you all the dildos you asked for? Gee whiz, we hope so, but probably not, because you're reading this right now. Maybe you can find some at fire sale prices at...
Your Christmas Wonkette Baby will overtake you with Christmas cuteness.

Donald Trump, Lying Carly Fiorina And War On Christmas RAGE! Your Weekly Top Ten

Oh hi, Wonkers, are you ready for the official War On Christmas week? Have you polished all your Festivus poles and candy-cane dildos, to wave at all the nice fundamentalist Christians who are just trying to go to church...
Wonkette Niece fires Donald Trump RIGHT BACK.

Republicans Are Jackholes And So Are Restaurant Customers. Your Weekly Top Ten

Top o' the Saturday morning to you, Wonkers! We assume you are lounged out in your Hello Kitty snuggie, ready to catch up on your Wonket Top Ten reading list from the week. If you're not, then take care of...
Fame and fortune except the fortune part.

Wonkette’s Evan Hurst Is World-Famous In Memphis: A Story By Evan Hurst

Oh hi, do you know me? I am one of your Wonkettes, and I am the most famous person in the universe. I am taking a break from having brunch with Taylor Swift, saying "Oh no she di'int" about...
San Bernardino Police Chief Jarrod Burguan, i.e. the man with the information.

San Bernardino Was Terrorism And The Media Is A Mess. Your Weekly Top Ten.

Good Saturday morning, Wonkers! What a week, huh? We come back from Thanksgiving, only to be greeted by not one, but TWO grand scale mass shootings. Both religiously-motivated, it seems. Only one we're officially calling "terrorism," and we're calling...
He speaks the truth.

Remember, Liberals: Ted Cruz And Dead Breitbart Are The Reason For The Season

Hooray, that dumb holiday where we eat 300 pounds of food and say we're "thankful" for "things" is over, and now we can go back to doing hot, wet War On Christmassing to each other, like we liberals do....
The reason for the season.

Here’s Your Turkey Drunk, Black Friday Hungover Weekly Top Ten. Read It NOW!

Good Saturday morning, Wonkers! You are so much fatter than last time we saw you, but that's OK, we are too. We hope your Thanksgiving was full of all the food you like, whether that's buckets of fried turducken...

Hillary LOLs At Benghazi Republicans, Sarah Palin Talks To God. Your Weekly Top Ten

Oh hello, Wonkers, how are YOUR family jewels hanging right now? You are probably thinking "Uh, Wonket, BUY A CALENDAR, MORAN," because the Top Ten post is supposed to be on Sundays, RIGHT? What is Wonket, some kind of...

Liberté, Égalité, Ménage À Trois: It’s Your Weekly Top Ten!

Oh HI, Wonkers, it is Sunday! You are probably hungover and stuff, but it's time for us to count down the top ten posts of the week and surprise, a couple of them are about the horrific terrorists attacks that...
Mature adult conversation. Who knew?

Ready To Spend Saturday Night Watching Hillary And Bernie Eat Each Other Alive?

Goody gumdrops, it is time for another Democratic debate! Since last time the Demon-cratics talked to each other on a stage like full-blown adults, a lot has happened! Jim Webb dropped out to spend more time with Republicans. Lincoln...
Hi, I'm Wonkette Baby. I'm just hangin' out below the donations paragraph, LIKE I DO.

Griftin’ Duggars, Teabaggin’ A-Holes And Ted Cruz. Your Weekly Top Ten

Hey Wonkerinos, it's Sunday where we live! Is it Sunday were you live, or do you live in space or something? Don't care, if you are reading this, it's Sunday, which means it's time for us to sexxxily count...
Yes America is that dumb

Yr Wonket Beated Up A Idiot Today And It Was Great, Also Too

You mad, bro? You must be mad because you are like GAHHHHH and ARGHHHHHH and angry comments (which we do not allow) and angry tweets (which we mute) and angry MyFacePlace words (which we ignore) and OMG we even made the spitting rage...

Whiny Republicans And Creeper Fundamentalists. Which Are Ickier? Your Weekly Top Ten

Well hello there, Wonkers. It's Sunday afternoon, time for your weekly top ten list, and it is also NOVEMBER OH MY HOW TIME FLIES! This also means yesterday was Halloween! You might have already seen Official Wonkette Babby, pictured...
Don't you want a t-shirt that looks like this? CLICK INSIDE TO GET IT!

Hillary Clinton And Sid Blumenthal Did Benghazi, For LOLs. Your Weekly Top Ten

Well hello there, Wonkers. It's Sunday afternoon, and we have been sleeping this whole weekend because we spent ALL THURSDAY AND FRIDAY, SO MANY HOURS OMG, chronicling the shitshow that was the Benghazi hearings. Did Hillary come out on...

Duggars Edge Out Bristol Palin In ‘Biggest A Idiot’ Contest Once More. Your Weekly Top Ten

HALLOOOOO, WONKERS! It's Sunday afternoon, and that means we are very excited to write the top ten posts of the week at you. Will you be so kind as to click on every single one of them and share...