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Posts Tagged ‘dollar’

Strong Dollar Policy Really Paying Off

Thursday, April 17th, 2008

This kid just bought the White House for 25 Kenyan shillingsWonkette Monetary Policy Operative “Lee” sends us welcome news: the U.S. dollar is totally beating the pants off the Kenyan shilling. You’ll recall that Barack Obama’s hometown of Kenya, Africa finally swore in a power-sharing cabinet following two months of violence after a disputed election. So it is nice to hear the American currency has gained “a slight ground” versus the currency of a nation with a 21.8% month-over-month inflation rate and a recent history of grave political instability. [NASDAQ.com]


Federal Reserve Can’t Stop Saving Economy!

Tuesday, March 18th, 2008

The Federal Reserve cut the federal funds rate — its “big deal” interest rate — by another 3/4 of a percentage point this afternoon, bringing the number down to 2.25%. This is the second 3/4-point cut in recent months, meaning Ben Bernanke is probably on speed since that is a lot to cut. MORE »


Georgia Man Tries to Use Fake $1 Million Dollar Bill, Fails

Wednesday, November 28th, 2007

this guy... this guy walks around with a million dollar billPolice in Aiken, SC have arrested a man for trying to open a bank account with a $1 million dollar bill. How did Alexander Smith of Augusta, Georgia come across such valuable currency? Probably by making it himself on Photoshop, because it was of course counterfeit. Extremely counterfeit! And when the bank tellers pointed this out to him, he started cursing them all out. Then the police came and NORFED his ass. [AP/Yahoo]


“Twenty Dollar” Bob Jury: The Stall Is Big Like Whoa

Friday, November 9th, 2007

i mean, as long as we're waiting, you know...Yesterday afternoon, the jury and defense team in the Florida trial of ex-state Rep. Bob Allen boarded a retard bus for a field trip, no permissions slips required. They “milled around Space View Park … and took turns peering into the men’s restroom where state Rep. Bob Allen encountered the undercover Titusville police officer” (the one he wanted to play Special Happy Friends with). And although the defense is claiming that the visit helped their case, it, um, kinda didn’t? MORE »


Wednesday, November 7th, 2007

“The Canadian dollar’s meteoric rise accelerated this week, rising two cents in less than 24 hours. The loonie broke through the US$1.10 barrier in overseas trading Wednesday, initially hitting the 110.02 cents US mark…. Analysts say it doesn’t appear that the loonie will be returning to earth anytime soon.” Ha ha Dennis Kucinich something or other. [The Canadian Press/Yahoo!]


U.S. Economy In Trouble? Call Chuck Norris

Thursday, September 27th, 2007

Chuck Norris recently and forcefully reminded us in a masculine manner that he would single-handedly turn Iraq into a manly democracy ruled by the iron fists of Chuck Norris. Now Bloomberg markets columnist Mark Gilbert has learned that Chuck Norris is also the brute-force answer to America’s collapsing economy, and here are a few examples: MORE »


Thursday, September 20th, 2007

Against the Canadian dollar, currency of the largest United States trading partner, the dollar tumbled to one-to-one, a level not seen since the 1976, the early phase of a currency crisis that would eventually send shock waves through the world economy. [NYT]


Wednesday, August 8th, 2007

China to sell off its dollar reserves, causing a worldwide crash in the value of the U.S. dollar, making U.S. exports cheaper and thus reinvigorating the moribund American manufacturing sector, and setting the stage for a new chapter of economic prosperity! Or maybe we’ll all be eating beans out of cans over trash fires instead. [Telegraph]


America On the Brink: Dollar Coin Found WITH NO FACE

Tuesday, March 13th, 2007

First came the staggering news that new U.S. dollar coins were minted without the crucial “In God We Trust” slogan — a painful acknowledgment that God had quit blessing America and America had quit trusting God.

Now there’s even spookier news: A couple in Denver came across a new dollar coin with no president’s face or anything, really, on either side of the coin. How did they even know it was a dollar coin and not the Lost Treasure of the Knights Templar or something? Probably because they went to the bank and specifically asked for the shiny new U.S. coins; people will apparently run out and buy whatever new coin gets made, in hopes that it will be fucked up and they can sell it on eBay for $300.

And that’s sort of what happened to our treasure-hunting couple, who we’ll meet after the jump.

MORE »


Scary Arab Nation Dumping U.S. Dollar!

Wednesday, December 27th, 2006

'I'm so sad.' - WonketteGuess who doesn’t love the sinking U.S. dollar? Everybody! MORE »