Tag: district attorney

San Antonio District Attorney Will Put Vaccines IN JAIL!

God bless ye, gentle readers, and welcome once more to the Snake Oil Bulletin! This week we have a virulent case of Dumb Pox spreading around, so do be sure to take precautions. Drink plenty of bleach, snort all...
Leaving the basement can be very stressful

Blogger For Stupidest Man On Internet Arrested Just For Pulling Gun On Black Lives Matter Folks

A rightwing blogger waved a loaded gun at a group of Black Lives Matter protesters last week, and was later found to be carrying enough ammo for a sustained firefight. Astonishingly, police did not shoot him dead.
A sovereign man and his sovereign pickup truck

Georgia Sovereign Citizen Fails To Arrest County Officials, Not Even With Constitution Magic

A Georgia sovereign citizen was thwarted in his attempt to arrest several county officials when police officers refused to obey his orders, even though he knows he has the authority to boss police around.

Uh Oh, White People, A Cop Shot A White Dude And Got Away With It

Here's a new variation on the "Cop Gets Away With Shooting Unarmed Victim" theme: A cop in Paradise, California, will not be charged after pulling his gun and shooting an unarmed accident victim, Andrew Nicholas Thomas, 26, while Thomas...
Why does Obama hate freedom scams?

Pat Robertson Pretty Sure Obama’s Going To Behead Everybody Just Like He Did In Oklahoma

Today, we've learned a little more about last Thursday's awful murder in Oklahoma, and according to the local district attorney, it appears that racial animosity may have had more to do with Alton Nolen's motives than religion did. Now, this...

Texas ‘Democrat’ Thinks All You Domestic Violenced Fillies Need To Count Your Blessings And Not Your Bruises

There is a Democrat running for District Attorney in Harris County, Texas, and he is kind of a dick! Not only is he kind of a dick, but we would go so far as to say he is NOT...

Buttocks Of New Brooklyn DA Simply Too Marvelous For Words, Predecessor’s Toilet Seat

So here's a story that seems to plumb new depths of pettiness: Brooklyn, New York's newly-elected District Attorney Ken Thompson reportedly has asked that the toilet seat in the in the DA office's private bathroom be replaced before he...

Rick Perry Line-Item Vetoes Funding For Public Integrity Unit Because Some Lady Got A DWI, Makes Sense To Us

So you see, Texas has this thing called a Public Integrity Unit, which is supposed to ride herd on public officials' ethics and spending and stuff. Except now it doesn't do anything, because Gov. Rick Perry used his line-item...

New York D.A. Busted Starring In Nudie Lewdie Dix Flix

In the criminal justice system, the people are represented by two separate but equally important groups: the cops who investigate crimes, and the district attorneys who star in Deep Throat Part II: The Bonening. A district attorney in upstate...