Well! Sure hope you weren’t planning on being anything other than sad and angry today, because we bring you a shitty story of misery and suck. Maybe you won’t even care, like “Disneyland, commodifying children’s dreams, anti-corporatism, OCCUPY!” Well maybe you should shut your fucking piehole, because Disneyland is awesome (if you never, ever, ever, […]

Aw, look at this nice picture of Mark Harris and his wife, who had a nice time in Florida until they went to the Epcot Center at Disneyworld and were shocked, shocked, to find a Mexican employee working at the American pavilion, which “showcases different cultures in the United States.”

Every year on this holy day, we all gather around the YouTube to enjoy the greatest presidential moments in American History, such as these guys screwing around with the Animatronic Presidents at the Disney World. Oh look, here’s Lincoln half-heartedly freeing the slaves after the Civil War already started. Those are his morals collapsing, right […]

In the days before YouTube, our computers were pretty safe from stuff like this. But, as slaves to audio-visual technology, we must now be exposed to moments best captured by a single photograph — as in turkey pardons of past presidencies — and then quickly forgotten. Here, President Obama again shows his cruel elitism, as […]