Wonkette

During the Hurricane Katrina fiasco, FEMA found out the hard way that sometimes the press just isn’t feeling very charitable towards the incompetent agency. So when they had a press conference today, the Washington Post’s Al Kamen reveals, it’s way better to just make sure the reporters can’t get there, and then to assign various staffers with make-believe roles as pretend reporters. MORE »

California’s burning, and there are political points ripe for the plucking! Michelle Malkin and Glenn Beck, for instance, both agree it’s all the environazis’ fault, with Malkin taking the opportunity to throw a few Mexicans on the pyre while she’s at it. MORE »

Iraqi insurgents nearly killed three Republican senators and a Democrat from the House, for good measure, as the Americans attempted to flee Iraq on Thursday. GOP senators Richard Shelby, James Inhofe, Mel Martinez and Alabama Representative “Robert” E. “Bud” Cramer were finishing their vacation in Baghdad when missiles and rocket-propelled grenades were fired at their C-130 cargo plane. MORE »

When inexplicable tragedies happen, some turn to god, and some turn to drink. We turn to our Anonymous Lobbyist. And also drink.

The 35W bridge collapse doesn’t present too many easy scapegoats — Pawlenty and Bush do severely fuck up everything they’re supposed to be in charge of managing, but America’s decaying infrastructure isn’t exactly the work of one or two men. No, years and years of work and lobbying went into ensuring that nothing would ever be repaired! AL explains how, after the jump.

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Every day, trains carrying unimaginably deadly materials run straight though our fair district on ancient, poorly maintained tracks, bound for god knows where, always moments away from derailing and killing thousands. MORE »

And my mission was very simple. I wanted to thank President Bush for the millions of FEMA trailers that were brought down there. They gave roofs over people’s head. People had the chance to have baths, air condition. We have TV, we have toiletry, we have things that are necessities that we can live upon.

But now, I wanted to remind the President that the job’s not done, and he knows that. And I just don’t want the government and President Bush to forget about us. And I just wish the President could have another term in Washington.

-Hurricaine Katrina survivor Rockey Vaccarella, after he drove his FEMA trailer from New Orleans to Washington to demand a meeting with President Bush, which he was, surprisingly, granted. MORE »

First they put the White House press corps in a trailer.

And now the toilet is clogged.

What do the reporters who work closest to President Bush on a daily basis have in common with refugees from Hurricane Katrina?

-Mark Silva, Chicago Tribune White House correspondent. MORE »

We spent a bit of time trawling through Michael Brown’s email for that definitive piece of evidence that would exonerate him (it was the one-armed man who didn’t rescue those couple hundred black people, seriously!), but we never found anything this good.

CNN is hedging their bets re. its authenticity, but it supposedly comes from a “good friend” of Brown’s and the President’s (right, right). Assuming it’s real, we’d be happy to hear your guesses as to the sender’s identity. But that’s a pretty big assumption, considering that all we have to go on is a very clean-looking and conveniently redacted .pdf. Wait, look, we found another email!

It’s got a big Situation Room stamp on it! It has to be authentic! Wolf Blitzer’s personal seal of approval — look for it on all your sensitive and politically damning correspondence. MORE »

Worst part of this email: It’s always annoying when Americans adopt pretentious Britishisms. Also: we are extremely curious about the redacted portion. We’re guessing it says “Feel free to fuck up royally…”

THE BLONDES WERE AGAINST HIM FROM DAY ONE. ALERT GE. MORE »