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Posts Tagged “Diplomacy”

dept. of suspicious bulges

Is Carla Bruni Knocked Up Again?


Here is a photo of France's new First Lady arriving in England with her midget husband. Her outfit speaks diplomatic volumes: flats, so as not to tower over M. Sarkozy; modest tweed, so as to remind Camilla of her youth back in the Depression. (In turn, Camilla wears a trashy befeathered nightmare hat because she is a tart.) But the real question is, why would a rail-thin former model be sporting a little belly pooch? We smell shotgun wedding. [The Sun]

3:10 PM on Wed Mar 26 2008
By saraksmith
7,236 views, 57 comments

Latest by 102415: @TGY: It doesn't matter what dirty dead things Camilla puts on her head because she'll never be you know who.@lovelyivy:Another influx of asswipe tools and trolls has arrived. As a person who's randomly had my head bashed in by a more »

it's pat

Hillary Clinton Caught In Millionth Bosnian Lie!

Ha ha, it turns out that Hillary Clinton even lies with her lying about her harrowing overseas adventures. First she says she once ran screaming through the streets of Tuzla smeared with the blood of Bosnian snipers as she singlehandedly brought peace to Northern Ireland; then she says she was the first president's wife to visit a war zone since Eleanor Roosevelt. Wrong again, Pantsuit! That honor goes to Pat Nixon, who visited Vietnam with Sinbad way back in 1969. More »

9:10 AM on Wed Mar 26 2008
By saraksmith
4,678 views, 49 comments

Latest by sandlapp: Who knew Pat Nixon had so much foreign policy experience? more »

star-humpers

Who Does Nancy Pelosi Think She Is, Richard Gere?

Oh Nancy Pelosi's so cool, she's the first female Speaker of the House! She wears chic outfits! She's from San Francisco! She hates China and loves freedom! And now she's palling around with the Dalai Lama, because she is the most sanctimonious California libtard since Richard Gere got exiled to a hamster sanctuary in Wyoming. More »

3:06 PM on Fri Mar 21 2008
By saraksmith
1,782 views, 17 comments

healer in chief

Bush To Check Out This 'World' Everyone's Whining About

Apparently, the president has caught wind of the fact that his visionary leadership has driven world opinion of This Great Nation into the shitter, forcing American students all over the world to act Canadian. And Bush will spend calendar year 2008 traveling abroad to restore our tattered image. Or at least that’s the angle in this Bloomberg story. We have to admit guys, we’re skeptical. More »

11:02 AM on Mon Dec 24 2007
By interngreg
1,594 views, 31 comments

john bolton

John Bolton Hates Bush for Listening to a Girl

John Bolton, former U.S. ambassador to the United Nations and overall sack of shit, is taking his grievances with American foreign policy to the German press now, and they are quite grievancesy! In an interview with the Fatherland’s Spiegel, Bolton claims that Bush’s “foreign policy is in free fall” now that he’s talking to gross people like Iran and Syria. But John Bolton is John Bolton, and he blames it on that chick at the State department, Rice or whatever, for going all vagina-ish on the Administration’s manly sensibilities. More »

11:48 AM on Wed Dec 19 2007
By Newell
1,959 views, 49 comments

Latest by Lyndon-La-Douche: Oops. My bad. I thought it read "George Bolton hates George Bush for being a Girl" more »

iraqembassyidontwannago-gate

Sissybitch Diplomats No Longer Forced To Iraq

The State Department announced Monday that it had filled its vacancies at the Iraq Embassy, so, ugh, fine, there’ll be no mandatory service — for now. This comes in the wake of massive bitching from members of our prestigious diplomatic corps, who were worried they’d be forced to serve somewhere that could actually use them. More »

1:31 PM on Tue Nov 20 2007
By Newell
1,098 views, 24 comments

diplomacy

Dipnote: You Pussy Diplomats, The Anbar Party Don't Never Stop

Foreign Service Officers (FSOs) having been bitching to high heaven ever since Condi & Her Power Friends ordered them to serve in Iraq. Fortunately the State Department has its savvy, Y2K-inspired Internet Weblog, Dipnote, to quell this undiplomatic sand-in-the-vagina-fest. Yesterday, an FSO currently serving in Iraq — he volunteered, of all things! — has a special message to his trembling colleagues in Foggy Bottom: The Marines over here think you’re “weenies.” More »

3:47 PM on Wed Nov 7 2007
By Newell
2,621 views, 33 comments

diplomacy

Diplomats Bitching About Mandatory Iraq Service

The State Department recently announced that it would order some diplomats to serve at the U.S. Embassy in Iraq due to a lack of volunteers, what with it being Iraq and all. As a 22-year-old, I prefer the idea of a diplomat-draft over that of a draft-draft, but these emissaries ain’t feeling it. The State Department held a town hall yesterday to run through the gripes (it’s all “dangerous” over there or something), and it’s pretty clear now that our diplomatic corps is just a bunch of pussies. More »

11:43 AM on Thu Nov 1 2007
By Newell
2,724 views, 55 comments

Latest by broken.yellow.fangs: The photo -- what is that? A gold-plated manhole cover waiting to be welded shut? more »

young turks dept.

White House Urges Congress Not to Learn From History

A House resolution that would recognize the 1915 Armenian Genocide as, well, a genocide is running into some problems: America’s strategic interests! You see, we are best (strategic) buds with the internationally despised Turks, because they let us use an air base. And as we all know, access to air bases trumps symbolic recognition of unthinkable acts of evil every time. More »

11:19 AM on Wed Oct 10 2007
By Pareene
1,800 views, 23 comments

wouldn't it be rice dept.

Even the Nazi Pope Has Had Enough of Condi

Recently it was revealed that Condoleezza Rice, GQ’s “MOST POWERFUL PERSON IN DC,” can’t actually get the New York Times to return her phone calls or print her lame op-eds. According to the BBC, they’re not the only ones to snub her — the Pope refused to meet with Condi last month. The Pope! The guy just met with those stupid British parents who killed their little girl at the Tapas bar or whatever, and he won’t meet with Condi? More »

11:45 AM on Wed Sep 19 2007
By Pareene
3,002 views, 28 comments

Latest by Confederatefag: Just like I did with the Values Voters choir, I like to imagine Condi having the shit fucked out of her by Strom Thurmond. Not the dashing young Strom of yore, but he old, ugly, senile, withered, flaccid, tang-hair-colored Strom more »

there's no crying in public diplomacy dept.

Condi, Karen, and Cal: Friends in Diplomacy


In this six-minute, State Department-provided clip, Karen Hughes (Under Secretary of State for Public Diplomacy) and Condoleezza Rice, GQ’s MOST POWERFUL PERSON IN WASHINGTON, DC, sit on a couch and chat with Cal Ripken, Jr., the famous baseball player. He apparently works for State now? As… Ambassador of Baseball? More »

4:56 PM on Wed Aug 15 2007
By Pareene
1,140 views, 21 comments

friends to the end dept.

Saudis Might Acknowledge Existence of Iraq

Our best friends the Saudis are doing us yet another solid — such bros they are! They might, maybe, if they feel like it, upgrade diplomatic relations with that little experiment we’re running over in Iraq. They still don’t really trust Nouri al-Maliki’s Shia government (who does!), and they think he’s kind of a pawn of Iran (who isn’t!) but hey, maybe they’ll open an embassy. You know, eventually. More »

10:44 AM on Wed Aug 1 2007
By Pareene
1,527 views, 28 comments

state dept. dept.

No One Liks Condi

Condi Rice is still the Secretary of State [can an intern confirm this?], but no one likes her or cares what she has to say. According to former New York Times foreign reporter Joel Brinkley, Rice’s influence worldwide has steadily fallen since she took over for the also-unloved Colin Powell 2 1/2 years ago, because Iraq is a mess and Bush is a lunatic and she is Bush’s bestest girl ever. More »

3:27 PM on Mon Jul 23 2007
By Pareene
4,442 views, 38 comments

as if dept.

The Condi Rice Method of Statesmanship

Moratinos emphasized that Spain’s relationship with Castro is also geared toward ensuring a transition to democracy. Spain’s diplomatic presence in Havana allows it to maintain more contact with Cuban dissidents than the U.S. has, he added.
More »

5:27 PM on Fri Jun 1 2007
By Pareene
3,257 views, 33 comments

coming in from the cold dept.

A Small Town in Maine

President Bush’s food tester is going to have a shitty Independence Day — Vladimir Putin’s coming to Kennebunkport! More »

10:37 AM on Thu May 31 2007
By Pareene
664 views, 25 comments

the queen haters dept.

Old English Lady Visits America

The Queen of England is still here, trying to surreptitiously take back the US for the British Empire under cover of darkness in a backroom deal with Dick Cheney, the Church of Scientology, a number of Freemasons, and Hitler’s brain. More »

10:11 AM on Mon May 7 2007
By Pareene
2,856 views, 55 comments

sex ed

Proper Sex Ed Being Taught Only in Overseas Embassies

The U.S. Embassy in Angola invited 50-Cent to address their staff — and their staff’s children — on the subject of HIV and AIDS awareness last month. It turned out pretty much as you’d expect. More »

8:18 PM on Thu Apr 12 2007
By Pareene
1,998 views, 8 comments

george w. bush

Bush Thrilled by Exotic Foreign Foods, Very Concept of Eating

President Bush: Hungry for diplomacy! And food. Mostly food. More »