dildos

DILDOS  1:48 pm April 4, 2012

Super-Slick James O’Keefe Wannabe Tries To ACORN Everybody While They Point And Laugh

by Rebecca Schoenkopf

Just because you are busy suing and getting sued by every partner you have ever had is no reason to ever turn your back for a second, James O’Keefe. That is when a newer, prettier, younger you will All About Eve you every time! So what super-slick moves is newest James O’Keefe apostle/role-stealer Mr. John [...]

WHO SAYS MAGIC ISN'T REAL?  5:26 pm August 11, 2011

Christine O’Donnell Amazon Page Mostly Dildos and Witchcraft Books

by Kirsten Boyd Johnson

What is this Internet Magick right here? The little Internet djinn are good-humored today and casting spells on Christine O’Donnell’s Amazon related products page for everyone’s amusement. This is apparently referred to as an “Amazon bomb,” but that just feels so military industrial. How about an “Amazon sorcery orgasm” or something a little less war-like [...]

TAKES ONE TO KNOW ONE  11:04 am March 7, 2011

George Will: Mike Huckabee Is a ‘Vibrator’

by Jack Stuef

2012 DILDO NEWS: “The most recent vibrator is Mike Huckabee,” reports George Will. George Will will not allow Republicans who talk about Barack Obama’s Kenyan birth to be the next president of the United States. That is uncouth. So, like a sporting gentleman, he will refer to them as dildos until they go away.

ISLAND OF MISFIT SEX TOYS  5:22 pm October 6, 2010

Congressional Candidate Regrets Sucking Reindeer Dildo

by Jack Stuef

There is, remarkably, a 28-year-old woman who is running for Congress from Virginia named Krystal Ball (JESUS CHRIST, BAD PARENTS). As we have, apparently, noted in the past, this woman is quite attractive, in terms of fornication. But we wrote that before photos showed up on the Internet of her fellating a Rudolph the Red-Nosed [...]

JUST THE TIP  5:32 pm October 4, 2010

James O’Keefe Swears He Wasn’t Going To Dildo CNN Lady On Boat

by Jack Stuef

It took James O’Keefe all weekend to come up with an alibi for why he tried to trick a CNN reporter into coming on a boat filled with lube and dildos and “an obvious sex tape machine,” but now he has posted his brilliant explanation on the Internet. “She would have had to consent before [...]

TRAITORS MUST BE EXECUTED TO DEATH  3:00 pm June 17, 2010

Florida GOP Congressman Wants Joe Barton Destroyed

by Ken Layne

Here is the corporate troll and traitor Joe Barton (R-Texas) apologizing to BP for the terrible inconvenience America has caused BP, and also promising to move back to communist-land because he hates America so much. Now a Republican congressman from Florida wants Barton kicked off the energy committee for being such a dildo.

CARTOON VIOLENCE  12:32 pm February 19, 2010

Gayest Cartoon Violence Ever

by Josh Fruhlinger

By the Comics CurmudgeonDid you ever see one of those romantic comedies where the two principals just straight up frickin’ loathe each other, and try to undermine and destroy one another, but then, in the stunning turnaround that generally happens at the end of Act I or thereabouts, it turns out that all that animosity [...]

CARTOON VIOLENCE  12:05 pm January 29, 2010

When ‘Change’ Happens, Things Get Weird

by Josh Fruhlinger

By the Comics CurmudgeonYou know, a little more than a year ago, we elected a dude for president whose whole campaign hinged on the word “change.” It was almost like Americans actually wanted things to be different, though of course that turned out not to be true at all, since it turns out that everything [...]

IT'S BEGINNING TO LOOK A LOT LIKE THE WAR ON XMAS  12:01 pm November 25, 2009

Wonkette Gift Guide Preview: Obama Dildo!

by Ken Layne

Unlike our amoral right-wing friends, here at Wonkette we don’t start the War on Xmas until after Thanksgiving (Cyber-Sex Thursday). But here’s a special preview of the kind of trash you can expect to find in our annual War on Xmas Gift Guide: Oh hey, it’s an Obama Dildo, so you can, uh, practice your [...]

CARTOON VIOLENCE  2:00 pm November 20, 2009

Asses: Another Installment In an Irregular Series

by Josh Fruhlinger

By the Comics CurmudgeonAs your Comics Curmudgeon demonstrated earlier this year, political cartoonists love butts. Just love ’em! The ass is the most polysemous of images, representing everything from sex appeal to debasement and humiliation to an actual butt. So we’re presenting a panoply of ass shots this week, with a greater emphasis on sodomy. [...]

CARTOON VIOLENCE  12:03 pm October 30, 2009

The Thrill Is Gone

by Josh Fruhlinger

By the Comics CurmudgeonDo you remember ’round about a year ago when it was all “hope and change” this and “yes we can” that, and everything was going to be fixed, forever? Ha ha! Obviously all of our problems are intractable and terrible and nobody can fix them, no matter how nice his teeth are. [...]

COMICS CURMUDGEON  11:08 am June 12, 2009

WRONG WRONG WRONG

by Josh Fruhlinger

By the Comics Curmudgeon Look, one of the things we namby-pamby liberals get critiqued for is our inability to just stand up and show some moral courage, to say that some things are right and some are wrong. Usually we’re all like “Oh, there’s context” or “It’s society’s fault” or “Who are we to judge” [...]

CARTOON VIOLENCE  12:48 pm January 9, 2009

Everything Is A Terrifying Nightmare

by Josh Fruhlinger

By the Comics CurmudgeonRemember a couple of months ago, when everything was all Hope this and Change that and Yes We Can whatever, and you thought that everything was going to be all sweetness and light from here on in? FOOLS! Little did you know that the nightmare would just go on, forever and ever, [...]

TEXAS   12:12 pm March 5, 2008

The Real Winner In Texas: Sex Toys

by Ken Layne


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