dick armey
FreedomWorks: Your New Source For Hillary Clinton Sexxxxxxytime…With Pandas!
Here at Wonket, we are pretty grateful for FreedomWorks. They’re like the snotty libertarian half-brother of grownup GOP PACs. Their notorious infighting devolved into a downright theater of the absurd when Dick Armey showed up WITH GUNS to remove top employees. Way to make office politics interesting, Dick! Speaking of interesting…ok, you know what? We’ve [...]
Dick Armey Sorry He Dished To Most Sinister Far-Left Outlet On The Planet, ‘Media Matters’
Were any of you as surprised as we were when Dick Armey decided to dish about all the crimes going on at his “grassroots” Tea Party group to the most sinister far-left outlet on the planet, Media Matters, last week? It was awesome; he explained how the “grassroots” Tea Party group FreedomWorks, before it paid [...]
Hot New ‘Guns Blazing’ Negotiation Technique Is All the Rage
Wonketeers, we understand that sometimes you are dissatisfied with the structure of a corporation you chair. You wish to reconfigure your management structure, synergize your efficiencies, and let some underperforming folks go. (Hahaha you do not get to do that because you are a peon who does not have your own wingnut group to run, [...]
Dick Armey: Clinton, Gingrich Would ‘Smoke Cigars and Talk About Their GFs’
What I discovered: Clinton found out about the Gingrich affair and called Newt over to the White House for a private meeting between the two of them. Clinton said, “You and I are alike.” Which meant, shut up about Monica or I’ll start telling your story. Olasky: Was it blackmail or bonding? Armey: Newt and [...]
New FreedomWorks Diversity Thing Sounds Really Fake
FreedomWorks is constantly on the move. We mean this figuratively and literally, since FreedomWorks is always very busy hosting death picnics — but also it actually moved its headquarters, because it is so afraid of all the libruls. And somehow FreedomWorks has been able to keep up the momentum, perhaps because Dick Armey keeps an [...]
Scary Liberal Hate Mail Makes FreedomWorks’ Lease Expire
FreedomWorks is a sparkling beacon of truth, a special Made In China sweatshop beacon that turns into a Dick Armey-shaped sponge when you place it in a glass of water. So why do liberals keep emailing FreedomWorks hateful messages such as “eat a turd sandwich and then drop dead, preferably at this very moment”? It’s [...]
Glenn Beck Launches Beatnik Wordplay Site
“Glenn Beck,” a longtime collaborative performance art project run by a team of situationist pranksters, has moved into its next phase! Not content with posting dadaist nonsense on the GlennBeck.com URL — so on the nose! — the team acquired TheBlaze.com (the name refers to the power of flame to cleanse away man’s attempt to [...]
A Children’s Treasury Of So-So BlackBerry Photos From FreedomWorks’ Tax Day Tea Party
Welcome to Narnia! We arrived at the FreedomWorks Tax Day Tea Party last night just as the Christian lion Admiral Ackbar was gettin’ the crowd all hot and bothered, about socialism, between their trips to the Fried Dough and Porta Potty lines. No just kidding, the speaker was maybe Neal Boortz or somebody else. “They’re [...]
DICK ARMEY QUITS LAW FIRM TO BECOME FULL-TIME LYING EXPLOITATIVE LIAR: Former Republican House majority leader Dick Armey, head of one of the most prominent wingnut Astroturfing organizations, FreedomWorks, is quitting his “real job” at a law firm for rather Palinesque quittery reasons. “The firm is busy with its business, and shouldn’t be asked to [...]
Gossip Roundup: Party Line
Gossip Roundup: A Fleeing Jenna
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