WORLD NEWS ANCHOR CHARLIE GIBSON IS QUITTING. Someone at ABC will now go to the Good Morning America studio, find Diane Sawyer, and shuffle her down the hall to replace him. Sawyer can probably just stay seated in whatever chair she uses over there during this exciting transition process, provided it’s one of those rolly ones. [ABC News]

That girl who nailed Eliot Spitzer, Ashley “Alexandra” Dupre, has given an interview to ABC’s Diane Sawyer as part of Sawyer’s “Prostitution in America” investigative journalistic reportorial KGB-spy series. Look forward to all sorts of juicy nuggets along the lines of: “In high school, Dupre was an honor student, worked in a restaurant and ‘never really socialized and went … to any of the parties, the high school parties. I got along with everyone, I was kind of popular. I was pretty popular.’” If she was so popular, WHY DIDN’T SHE GO TO THE PARTIES? You know, The High School Parties? That’s all. [ABC News]

Here’s Joe the Plumber on the teevee this morning with, uh, who is that, Diane Sawyer. Good Morning America. It turns out that Joe does not make $250,000 a year, or anywhere close to that, but he really does hate the idea of a progressive tax system! Do you think he knows that it EXISTS ALREADY? He wouldn’t like that Socialism none too much, mmhmm. Guy just really hates the money taxes, and that’s why he never pays them. [YouTube]

Yesterday Wonkette brought you the EXCLUSIVE FOOTAGE SEEN NOWHERE ELSE of Barack Obama’s 10- and 7-year-old daughters, Misha and Selma or whatever, being interviewed by some pretty Access Hollywood gal. This was a first, as Obama usually likes to hide his children in underground caves to shield them from THE SPINELESS INTERNET. Naturally, everyone made fun of these two children and, by the end of the day, were blaming them for starting the Iraq War and also capitulating on FISA. Nary an Internet Addict found the children, say, adorable. And that is why Barack Obama told adult-child Diane Sawyer on today’s Good Morning America that he’ll never put his children on teevee again. MORE »

ABC presented an exclusive Diane Sawyer interview with Iran President Mahmoud Ahmadinejad this morning, in which he skilfully dodged every question while still giving answers with more substance than the last dozen Bush interviews. MORE »

• Rush & Molloy: Diane Sawyer most demanding VIP in Martha’s Vineyard. Bill and Hillary Clinton appear everywhere at once. Newt Gingrich pitches Hillary-esque sit-com. [NYDN]
• Lloyd Grove’s Lowdown: Hillary Clinton and Gail Sheehy catfight looms (first item). [NYDN]
• Cindy Adams: Some guy from Wyoming trashes Ann Coulter (first item). [NYP]
• The Reliable Source: Ken Mehlman wants to share Bush’s b-day presents with all Republicans (second item). Karl Rove stares at the walls (third item). [WP]
• Liz Smith: President Bush a member of the “60 in ‘06″ club. Other members include Diane Sawyer, Liza Minnelli, and Cher. [NYP]