Ha ha, Michael Dukakis loses again. This bro, former DNC chair Paul Kirk, was more or less picked by the Kennedy family. “Deval, darling, appoint this human, we used to summer together,” Vicki Kennedy urged the Governor of Massachusetts. But it was probably a good pick, because Kirk is familiar with Ted Kennedy’s staff and might actually have some sense of what the hell he’s doing. Oh golly. Check out John Kerry in the video! What a SEVERE couple these two will make, in the Senate. [NYT, YouTube]

• MASS. SENATE PASSES ‘TED KENNEDY MEMORIAL PARTISAN WARM-BODY ACT,’ HOORAY! Oh good, now Gov. Deval Patrick should be able to sign this quick fixeroo tomorrow and Michael Dukakis or whoever can putz around Washington for a few months, casting a crucial vote or two occasionally. Also, pundits can stop saying, “But the Democrats only have 59 seats, they need Olympia Snowe!!!” because it is not true anymore. No one needs Olympia Snowe! NO ONE! [Boston Globe]

Former Massachusetts Gov. Michael Dukakis, who one time — for fun — let a black inmate run free so as to rape the white ladies, could be the next fake Ted Kennedy, for a few months! He is “the name most prominently mentioned” appointee for Gov. Deval Patrick, who awaits a bill allowing him to do this, which is being debated in the House today. This is big news, because most people had just assumed Michael Dukakis was dead. [Washington Post]

Ted Kennedy might have a mean old liberal Democrat replacement in the Senate soon! All the Massachusetts legislature must do is change the comical law that Ted Kennedy forced it to enact in 2004, the one that prevented Gov. Mitt Romney from appointing a Republican to President John Kerry’s Senate seat. The legislature has moved up a hearing from October to early September on a bill that would allow Gov. Deval Patrick to appoint a temporary replacement to Kennedy’s seat, immediately. Patrick will be looking for a replacement with such qualifications as the ability to press the “yea” button on a health care reform bill, and nothing else. Would it be hypocritical of the Massachusetts state government to amend this law right now? Yes. Good GOD, yes! But who cares? [Salon/War Room]

Now that the question of what to do about Ted Kennedy’s Senate seat is no longer an academic one, folks in Boston seem to be giving the issue a little re-think. Remember Kennedy wrote to the governor recently asking him if he couldn’t perhaps do something about that terrible law Democrats passed in 2004, the one that called for a special election in the event of a Senate vacancy FIVE MONTHS after the seat first opened? That got everybody so steamed … MORE »

Hey you know that handsome black politician who plagiarized Thomas Jefferson and likes to talk about hope? He is like that other guy, so an Obama presidency is as naturally doomed as the Patrick governorship. MORE »

You catch him once, he gets suspended for a semester, then goes on academic probation, and then he plagiarizes horribly again. Will Barack Obama ever learn that Massachusetts Gov. Deval Patrick has copyrights on every word? Apparently not, since he may have stolen yet another whole two sentences from Patrick. MORE »

Do you still remember the “Presidents Day Plagiarism Outrage” of 2008? Well now there’s another one — and this time, instead of fancy word-user Barack Obama being blamed for repeating such phrases as “I have a dream” and “The Declaration of Independence,” which were earlier spoken by a different black politician, it’s Hillary Clinton who got caught biting rhymes from yet another “black” politician: ex-president and “first black president” Bill Clinton! MORE »

Hey, Barack Obama, we have rules in this country. Rules like, You cannot go around quoting the “I Have A Dream” speech, or the Declaration of Independence, or that weird/wrong thing FDR used to say (”The only thing we have to fear is fear itself”) to try to soothe the desperately poor and angry people who were this close to “seizing the means of production.” And that’s why Hillary’s campaign is sending everybody these shocking YouTubes proving that another black person has also trotted out a couple of patriotic chestnuts as proof that campaign speeches really do change the world. MORE »