Tag Archives: dennis kucinich

 

Dennis Kucinich Will Single-Handedly Impeach Bush

A few years back, everybody was all, “Let’s impeach Bush & Cheney & Rumsfeld and try them for war crimes and execute them by firing squad, on Pay Per View.” And then our nation sort of got over it — what administration doesn’t launch a bunch of illegal wars — because the Democrats won Congress and the economy collapsed and now Americans are basically just looking around nervously for food and shelter, maybe under that bridge. Well the good times are back: Dennis Kucinich is going to impeach George W. Bush on Monday! Read more on Dennis Kucinich Will Single-Handedly Impeach Bush…
 

DREAMS COME TRUE:If you’ve been wondering what the debate maybe would’ve been like if the Highest Court in Nevada hadn’t barred the dangerous Dennis Kucinich from taking part, wonder no more. Democracy Now’s Amy Goodman has made some fantasy-baseball version where Dennis really did take part! [Democracy Now] Read more on …
 

Hillary, John & Barry Put Vegas To Sleep

That was sure worth getting up before dawn and making a five-hour drive to Las Vegas! Thanks, Democrats. Our coverage for the night is just about over, but we’ll have much more Campaign Trail Fun all over Las Vegas on Wednesday, which is basically today. There will be events, and perhaps a rally of some kind! All in the cause of giving Americans a “safety valve” so they can “blow off steam” by voting for pretty much identical elitist candidates. Anyway, here’s a recap of Wonkette’s Tuesday in Nevada, plus more pictures, if you want them. Read more on Hillary, John & Barry Put Vegas To Sleep…
 

This Debate Will Never Start

Here is the scene: There are many, many, many filing tables. About a third of the chairs are occupied. There are flat screen monitors on stands, and they’re all playing this SAME GODDAMNED 5-MINUTE LOOP ABOUT HOW NEVADA IS SO AWESOME IF YOU ARE A MEXICAN WHO MOVED HERE. Or a Cuban. Harry Reid does the intro. I have seen this at least a dozen times and have no doubt I’ll see it another dozen times before the debate finally begins. Read more on This Debate Will Never Start…
 

Evil Nevada Supreme Court Backs Fascist MSNBC: Kucinich Is Out Again!

What have they done to Dennis now? The happy little candidate was kicked out of tonight’s debate for no good reason, and then he went to court to get back in, and then MSNBC went to the state supreme court and just got him re-kicked out. Jesus, what did Kucinich to do anybody? We will seek him out, by looking for his very tall, hot wife. And then we’ll ask him how he feels or whatever.
 

The Kuciniches Will Always Have a Home Here

NBC’s appeal to keep Dennis Kucinich out of tonight’s MSNBC debate in Vegas was set for a 4:30 ET hearing in Nevada’s Supreme Court (the majors!). Word should come out shortly whether our favorite hobbit makes the grade or not. Also, Liz “Polaroid” Glover did not go with Ken to Vegas. This is just a leftover from New Hampshire, and THEN THAT’S IT. [The Caucus] Read more on The Kuciniches Will Always Have a Home Here…
 

NBC Ordered To Allow Sweet Dennis

Dennis Kucinich’s lawsuit to get into tonight’s Democratic debate from Vegas actually worked. A judge ordered that NBC must include him in the debate. It makes sense, since he and John Edwards ultimately have the same chances of winning the nomination. UPDATE: NBC News “will appeal a judge’s ruling rather than include Democratic presidential hopeful Dennis Kucinich in a candidates’ debate in Nevada.” So mean! [Las Vegas Now] Read more on NBC Ordered To Allow Sweet Dennis…
 

NBC today disinvited Kucinich from the upcoming Nevada debate, after having issued him an invitation on Wednesday. See, they’d tried to make the original criteria stringent enough to keep him out (the way that ABC did), but then they didn’t succeed the first time, so they changed the criteria. Dennis is, understandably miffed and may sue. Luckily, he has a special lady friend back home in Ohio to comfort him and he didn’t stand a snowball’s chance in hell regardless. [The Hill] Read more on …
 

Gipper-Esque

Surprisingly, the Palestinians don’t have a very high opinion of Bush. [New York Times] Bill Richardson, we knew him well. [Washington Post] Giuliani doesn’t think voters should discount him just because he hasn’t been in the race for weeks. [New York Times] Read more on Gipper-Esque…
 

Another Man Tries to Give Liz Sausage

Dennis and Elizabeth Kucinich have been working really hard to promote his big bid for the Presidency — so hard, in fact, that Dennis has attracted 4 primary challengers for his Congressional reelection campaign. One of them, Joe Cimperman, is apparently after more than just Kucinich’s Congressional seat. On Tuesday night, Cimperman visited the Kuciniches’ home armed with cameras and a basket of sausages. He found only the lovely Elizabeth, who bid him a swift adieu. Silly boy! To think that the lovely maiden’s heart could be won with amateur porn and floppity phalli! The woman has refused to show off her tongue ring and obviously already has all the meat she can handle. [Cleveland Plain Dealer] Read more on Another Man Tries to Give Liz Sausage…
 

The Story of Dennis & Liz

newVideoPlayer("dennis2.flv", 475, 376,""); SORRY THIS WAS BROKEN, EARLIER. NOW IT’S FIXED, HOORAY!OK boys (plus women and curious gay men), here’s your Liz Kucinich video. Oh, and Dennis, talking about why he should win some poll. Let me just say that these two — and Dennis’ campaign team — have been infinitely more polite and available than any of the others. And not just because he’s losing his ass off — Duncan Hunter is IMPOSSIBLE to find! Although he might be dead in a ditch somewhere. Hahahaha, that would be too funny, if Duncan Hunter died. Read more on The Story of Dennis & Liz…
 

Dennis Kucinich Is Too Cool For Your Stupid American Presidency

Look at him. Of course he’s always smiling. He is a short old man surrounded by long luscious women — young women, too. When he loses elections, movie stars invite him to live in their mansions. Here’s Dennis Kucinich in a hot-lady sandwich as featured in Sunday’s New York Times Magazine. Read more on Dennis Kucinich Is Too Cool For Your Stupid American Presidency…
 

The Most Important City in the World?

OK, no more “promises” about when stuff appears. Let’s just say Ron Paul is a flirt and Tom Tancredo thinks Liz needs to learn a thing or two about what “racism” means. We’re in the lobby of the Manchester Radisson now, somehow on the set of MSNBC’s Morning Joe, with the Dennis Kucinich campaign team (very nice people!) on one side and Chris “Rangoon” Matthews (avoid! avoid!) on the other. As it turns out this is the only way to get Internets in the state of New Hamsters. Read more on The Most Important City in the World?…
 

Kucinich Sues Texas Democrats Over Loyalty

Kucinich was kept off the Texas primary ballot because he refused to promise to vote for the eventual Democratic candidate (perhaps in deference his his BFF). Kucinich actually crossed out the oath, so the Texas Dems called his application “defective” and want to run their primary without him. He filed a lawsuit today to make them keep his name on the ballot, but it doesn’t sound like it has a chance in hell. Boy, boys, boys. It’s just a little extra ink, why are you so worried? Besides, he travels with Elizabeth. Why wouldn’t you want him to come to Texas? [El Paso Times] Read more on Kucinich Sues Texas Democrats Over Loyalty…
 

Murdoch-WSJ Hit Piece Destroys Kucinich Presidency

Dennis Kucinich was this close to winning both the nomination and the presidency when Rupert Murdoch’s evil new Wall Street Journal brazenly brought up that whole UFO incident, which everybody had completely forgotten because it was only a widely reported and heavily mocked part of a nationally televised Democrat debate a few months ago. Read more on Murdoch-WSJ Hit Piece Destroys Kucinich Presidency…
 

Pizza Hut Ad Smears Dennis Kucinich

newVideoPlayer("Pizza_Hut_Snapper.flv", 475, 376);A new smartass Pizza Hut ad splices together various presidential candidates’ soundbites to make it sound like lower pizza prices are a pressing issue. Cute. But then it shows Dennis Kucinich mentioning “UFOs”, followed by a cutaway voiceover saying “CONFUSED?” That’s fucking unfair. That fattie Bill Richardson is clearly behind this, what with the tight race for sixth place heading into the home stretch. Read more on Pizza Hut Ad Smears Dennis Kucinich…
 

A Little Competition

Cynthia McKinney, the former Congresswoman from Georgia defeated by her own inability to shut up about how “the Jews” wanted her to go down every single time time she loses a race, is running for the Green Party’s presidential nomination. Also, she now lives in California in an effort to escape all the Jews in Georgia. Since there aren’t any Jews in the Green Party, it’ll be interesting to see who she blames when she loses again. Probably the Jews. [CNN] Read more on A Little Competition…
 

“The youngest brother of Democratic presidential candidate Dennis Kucinich was found dead at his [Cleveland] home Wednesday. Perry Kucinich, 52, was found face down by another brother, Larry, at about 9 a.m., said Powell Caesar, a spokesman for the Cuyahoga County Coroner’s office.” [AP] Read more on …
 

Kucinich Sells Horrible Recount Relic for Xmas

Still haven’t bought your special someone a Christmas gift? Well let salesman Dennis Kucinich make you v. v. special offer: For only $219.95, Dennis Kucinich sell you “a Palm Beach County voting machine from the 2000 election ‘containing actual chads,’ with a ‘replica butterfly ballot’ and a letter signed by Kucinich proclaiming ‘the stolen presidential election of 2000,'” to quote Gannett News. Very good price, my friend. Read more on Kucinich Sells Horrible Recount Relic for Xmas…
 

Who Needs Oprah When You Have Sean Penn!

Sean Penn is expected to formally endorsed Dennis Kucinich at a press conference at San Francisco State University today, joinging the ranks of Larry Flynt and Shirley MacLaine. But whatever may happen or not happen there, it might be totally eclipsed by the actor/director’s latest rant: “It’s been an odd week,” Penn wrote in today on HuffPo. “For me, a particularly odd week. But that’s another story. So, wait a minute. Iran DOESN’T have nuclear weapon capability??? So, who are we gonna bomb? I want to bomb somebody!” Hey, me too! Read more on Who Needs Oprah When You Have Sean Penn!…
 

Kucinich Loves His Hot Wife

Yes, yes, the Washington Post has a fawning profile of the Kucinich marriage in its Style section written by Libby Copeland. Snark, snark, snark. We apologize profusely, but the Wonketteer officially covering all short, dark politicians was apparently a little hormonal this morning and totally had something in her eye that she had to get out, okay? Read more on Kucinich Loves His Hot Wife…
 

Government Types Hold Alien Panel, Pull 9/11 Card

History will remember the 2008 Dennis Kucinich campaign for two things: his hot-ass wife Elizabeth, and bringing UFOs back into the political dialogue. Kucinich’s discussion of his UFO encounter during the last Democratic debate sparked a resurgence of very important questions about how our government is handling the “alien situation.” No, not Mexicans — like LEGIT aliens in flying saucers and shit. Last week, former Arizona Gov. Fife “The Fife” Symington wrote about his alien encounter after years of denying it. On Monday, The Fife was a key member of a UFO panel featuring experts with Air Force, NASA, FAA, Et Cetera and So Forth experience. Read more on Government Types Hold Alien Panel, Pull 9/11 Card…