Tag Archives: democracy

  a series of principled decisions

Hey, Here Is a Photo of Obama Egypt Anti-American Groups Can Use!

Hey America, guess what your government did today? It sad idly while some security forces it funded in another country set their hoses on anti-dictatorship protesters who were praying. Yes, it appears that Egypt has gone to crap, and its authoritarian regime may soon crumble in the name of freedom. And where will the American president be in all of this? Standing next to that dictator, smiling, on millions of election posters for anti-American political parties very soon. There are many of these photos to choose from! Yes, the people of the Muslim world finally are standing up for themselves and for freedom, just like ol’ Georgey Bush wanted. But the United States of America is not joining them. Oh, there will be a “review” of our relations with this regime in “coming days,” according to Robert Gibbs. Hmm, too late? Decades too late, maybe? Read more on Hey, Here Is a Photo of Obama Egypt Anti-American Groups Can Use!…
  voice of america

Obama: Anti-Dictator Demonstrators Should Stand Down

In Tuesday’s State of the Union address, Barack Obama did what every president does in that thing: He praised people around the world who rose up for democracy and against authoritarian regimes. It was because these people Thought Big and American that freedom would Win the Future! But though Obama praised voters in Sudan and demonstrators in Tunisia, he said nothing about what was going on in Egypt. In fact, he’s been completely quiet about Egypt. That is, until he was cornered on YouTube yesterday, of all things, by noted journalist the Keyboard Cat or whatever. According to Obama, the regime in Egypt is trying to be more democratic. And as for the demonstrators? He’s not going to say they shouldn’t want democracy. But he’s not supporting what they’re doing. Read more on Obama: Anti-Dictator Demonstrators Should Stand Down…
  winning the future

Man With Pencil: Christians Should Abandon Democracy, Support Dictator

Look, sooner or later, the evangelical Christians were going to lose out on this democracy thing. There’s just not enough of them for their views to supersede the desired liberties of the majority. If they want to hold on to power, they’re going to have to return to their roots by supporting a new dictatorship. And the man with the pencil will be just the one to do it. Read more on Man With Pencil: Christians Should Abandon Democracy, Support Dictator…
  pandaleaks

It’s All Going To Be OK: The Zoo Pandas Signed a Five-Year Extension

Why do we suddenly see members of Congress referring inanely to nerdface Hu Jintao, the weakest leader in the history of the People’s Republic of China, as a “dictator” and a murdering “gangster”? Our pandas have been SECURED. That’s right, Washington, your pandas have signed a five-year extension, so you can rest assured that your mediocre zoo will continue to be somewhat used for something other than as a jogging track. “The pandas may be a cultural attraction we had to borrow from China, but everything in Washington is borrowed from China, and we need something to put on our Metro cards.” But despite the free speech grandstanding, if China suddenly becomes a democracy we probably will lose the pandas, haha. Read more on It’s All Going To Be OK: The Zoo Pandas Signed a Five-Year Extension…
  the oracle of tennessee

Basil Marceaux’s Midterm Predictions

When you’re looking for a solid prediction of today’s results, to whom do you really want to turn? Nate Silver? Mark Halperin? The Cook Political Report? No. You turn to this campaign season’s best candidate, Basil Marceaux. Marceaux told us the Republicans will win three seats, which is enough to control the House. (To be fair, before he said this he was discussing about the FEC, which he says controls the whole system, making our country a democracy, even though the Pledge of Allegiance says it’s a republic.) After the jump, Basil makes his prediction in the Nevada Senate race. Read more on Basil Marceaux’s Midterm Predictions…
  kill chavez and take his oil

Election Observers Will Observe Hugo Chavez’s Earthquake Machine

“Election observers” (CIA people) are in Venezuela, probably trying for another coup d’etat? Let’s hope so! As international delegates begin trickling into Venezuela to oversee Sunday’s National Parliamentary election, some in this nation of 27 million say there are too few coming too late to watch the hotly contested vote. Read more on Election Observers Will Observe Hugo Chavez’s Earthquake Machine…
  journalistic negligence

White House Transcriptionists Beg For Trade Group Leadership Role

The race for who will rule the captured souls of the White House Correspondents’ Association has begun, and it is almost exactly like regular politics. Ballots aren’t due until July 15, but WHCA reporters are whispering these actual things to each other, at work, right now: “My expectation was that I would be running unopposed” and “The basic issue for me is access” and “I’m charming.” Read more on White House Transcriptionists Beg For Trade Group Leadership Role…
  online fetish shows

Michele Bachmann Performs Online Tonight — Don’t Miss Out!

OMG you guys, this is more awesome than a Night Ranger/Styx double-bill: According to the teabagging fetishist website Ensuring Liberty, “rock star” Congressvixen Michele Bachmann will be performing LIVE and IN CONCERT at a virtual town hall meeting tonight at 8 PM EST, with fellow Congressional “rock star” Steve King as her opening act. Real America’s two greatest talents will perform a set of shriek-y fight-the-power ballads about “the disasterous [sic] implications of the Dodd Financial Reform Bill,” and other things that make them feel all emo inside. Then they’ll answer questions from viewers at home — that’s you, maybe! — about their latest collaborative EP, We Poop Flags, available at Walmarts and feed mills now. Read more on Michele Bachmann Performs Online Tonight — Don’t Miss Out!…
  democracy is coming to the usa

Most Americans Hate Government, Democracy Itself

Important cable teevee station CNN has commissioned two (2) polls of the Americans, and the results are bad for the Tea Baggers’ beloved “U.S. Constitution” and “Democracy,” so it’s a good thing those people don’t actually like either of those things, when it leads to a common slave becoming the so-called “People’s President” who puts his feet on the desk. And yet … does anyone really love “democracy” anymore? Read more on Most Americans Hate Government, Democracy Itself…
  america's biggest asshole

Ron Paul Hates Freedom & Democracy (In Iran)

If there’s one thing everybody can agree upon, it’s that the brave democracy protesters in Iran deserve at least our moral support, right? It’s not like it costs money or risks our safety to, say, put a “me too” green stripe on our dumb blogs, right? NO WRONG, IDIOTS, Ron Paul just cast the lone opposing vote on the harmless House Resolution 560, “Expressing support for all Iranian citizens who embrace the values of freedom, human rights, civil liberties, and rule of law, and for other purposes.” Read more on Ron Paul Hates Freedom & Democracy (In Iran)…
  why does he love death so much?

McCain: Let’s Go Give Those A-rabs In Wherever A New Election, HEHNGNN?

Visit msnbc.com for Breaking News, World News, and News about the Economy Here’s more of John McCain making a damn ruckus over Iran. He truly believes that the United States must do whatever it can — use all available options! — to ensure Iran counts all votes in its domestic presidential election. (And it also needs to ensure that Ahmadinejad loses, regardless of how the votes play out. Democracy!) Just remember, again, that if WALNUTS! were president right now, you would be dead, regardless of age, as all Americans would have been shipped out to fight in the wars in Iran, Iraq, Afghanistan, Pakistan, China, Russia, Spain, France, Mexico, “Africa,” Spain again, North Korea, Greece, Italy, Nazi Germany, the Carolinas, and Neptune. [MSNBC] Read more on McCain: Let’s Go Give Those A-rabs In Wherever A New Election, HEHNGNN?…
 

There Will Be Dancing In The Streets Of Lahore Today

As anyone who has seen White Nights can attest, there is one force in the world more dangerous and powerful than love. Or democracy. Wonkette operative “Ivan” sends us this image captured by the New York Times, in which we see secret agents smuggling this highly volatile substance into a major metropolitan area in Pakistan. Read more on There Will Be Dancing In The Streets Of Lahore Today…
 

Flames, Pestilence Complicate Virginia Campaigns

Last Tuesday, as tornadoes swept the South and the Midwest struggled beneath a blanket of snow, the weather showed it would stop at nothing to foil the progress of Democracy. Now the weather has set its sights on Virginia and the Carolinas, sending down a plague of hellfire and howling winds–just in time to stop presidential hopefuls Barack Obama and Hillary Clinton from campaigning in the area. Read more on Flames, Pestilence Complicate Virginia Campaigns…
 

Son of ‘Candid Camera’ Host Couldn’t Care Less What You Think

Peter Funt, son of twisted sadist Allen Funt, has had it up to here with all these polls! Who cares what a representative sampling of Americans think about things! Not this not-quite-famous person, that’s for sure! To be fair, The Today Show did apparently have some sort of “America’s Best Sandwich” poll, clear proof that our national obsession with “voting” has gone too far. Read more on Son of ‘Candid Camera’ Host Couldn’t Care Less What You Think…
 

U.S. Generals Finally Admit They’re Not In Iraq For ‘Democracy,’ Either

Top U.S. generals in Iraq have some bad news for fans of Democracy: Iraq cannot have some. Nearly five years into the greatest American war ever, Army brass are finally admitting what nearly everyone else on Earth (including Dick Cheney) has known for so many years: Bombing the fuck out of a distant country for no actual reason and killing half a million of its people and scattering its armed military forces and destroying its entire infrastructure and executing its government and raping its children and elderly in torture chambers and forcing its educated and professional classes to flee to other countries is not, in fact, a surefire way to spread democracy in the Middle East. Read more on U.S. Generals Finally Admit They’re Not In Iraq For ‘Democracy,’ Either…
 

Mike Gravel Wants You to Have to Vote Even More Often

What has crazy old man Mike Gravel been up to since he left the Senate 200 years ago? He founded a nonprofit called “The Democracy Foundation” whose aim is nothing less than the complete and utter destruction of American democracy as we know it. Because Mike Gravel and his little organization want to put you, the people, the stupid, stupid people, in charge. Read more on Mike Gravel Wants You to Have to Vote Even More Often…