Tag Archives: democracy

  online fetish shows

Michele Bachmann Performs Online Tonight — Don’t Miss Out!

OMG you guys, this is more awesome than a Night Ranger/Styx double-bill: According to the teabagging fetishist website Ensuring Liberty, “rock star” Congressvixen Michele Bachmann will be performing LIVE and IN CONCERT at a virtual town hall meeting tonight at 8 PM EST, with fellow Congressional “rock star” Steve King as her opening act. Real America’s two greatest talents will perform a set of shriek-y fight-the-power ballads about “the disasterous [sic] implications of the Dodd Financial Reform Bill,” and other things that make them feel all emo inside. Then they’ll answer questions from viewers at home — that’s you, maybe! — about their latest collaborative EP, We Poop Flags, available at Walmarts and feed mills now. Read more on Michele Bachmann Performs Online Tonight — Don’t Miss Out!…
  democracy is coming to the usa

Most Americans Hate Government, Democracy Itself

Important cable teevee station CNN has commissioned two (2) polls of the Americans, and the results are bad for the Tea Baggers’ beloved “U.S. Constitution” and “Democracy,” so it’s a good thing those people don’t actually like either of those things, when it leads to a common slave becoming the so-called “People’s President” who puts his feet on the desk. And yet … does anyone really love “democracy” anymore? Read more on Most Americans Hate Government, Democracy Itself…
  america's biggest asshole

Ron Paul Hates Freedom & Democracy (In Iran)

If there’s one thing everybody can agree upon, it’s that the brave democracy protesters in Iran deserve at least our moral support, right? It’s not like it costs money or risks our safety to, say, put a “me too” green stripe on our dumb blogs, right? NO WRONG, IDIOTS, Ron Paul just cast the lone opposing vote on the harmless House Resolution 560, “Expressing support for all Iranian citizens who embrace the values of freedom, human rights, civil liberties, and rule of law, and for other purposes.” Read more on Ron Paul Hates Freedom & Democracy (In Iran)…
  why does he love death so much?

McCain: Let’s Go Give Those A-rabs In Wherever A New Election, HEHNGNN?

Visit msnbc.com for Breaking News, World News, and News about the Economy Here’s more of John McCain making a damn ruckus over Iran. He truly believes that the United States must do whatever it can — use all available options! — to ensure Iran counts all votes in its domestic presidential election. (And it also needs to ensure that Ahmadinejad loses, regardless of how the votes play out. Democracy!) Just remember, again, that if WALNUTS! were president right now, you would be dead, regardless of age, as all Americans would have been shipped out to fight in the wars in Iran, Iraq, Afghanistan, Pakistan, China, Russia, Spain, France, Mexico, “Africa,” Spain again, North Korea, Greece, Italy, Nazi Germany, the Carolinas, and Neptune. [MSNBC] Read more on McCain: Let’s Go Give Those A-rabs In Wherever A New Election, HEHNGNN?…
 

There Will Be Dancing In The Streets Of Lahore Today

As anyone who has seen White Nights can attest, there is one force in the world more dangerous and powerful than love. Or democracy. Wonkette operative “Ivan” sends us this image captured by the New York Times, in which we see secret agents smuggling this highly volatile substance into a major metropolitan area in Pakistan. Read more on There Will Be Dancing In The Streets Of Lahore Today…
 

Flames, Pestilence Complicate Virginia Campaigns

Last Tuesday, as tornadoes swept the South and the Midwest struggled beneath a blanket of snow, the weather showed it would stop at nothing to foil the progress of Democracy. Now the weather has set its sights on Virginia and the Carolinas, sending down a plague of hellfire and howling winds–just in time to stop presidential hopefuls Barack Obama and Hillary Clinton from campaigning in the area. Read more on Flames, Pestilence Complicate Virginia Campaigns…
 

Son of ‘Candid Camera’ Host Couldn’t Care Less What You Think

Peter Funt, son of twisted sadist Allen Funt, has had it up to here with all these polls! Who cares what a representative sampling of Americans think about things! Not this not-quite-famous person, that’s for sure! To be fair, The Today Show did apparently have some sort of “America’s Best Sandwich” poll, clear proof that our national obsession with “voting” has gone too far. Read more on Son of ‘Candid Camera’ Host Couldn’t Care Less What You Think…
 

U.S. Generals Finally Admit They’re Not In Iraq For ‘Democracy,’ Either

Top U.S. generals in Iraq have some bad news for fans of Democracy: Iraq cannot have some. Nearly five years into the greatest American war ever, Army brass are finally admitting what nearly everyone else on Earth (including Dick Cheney) has known for so many years: Bombing the fuck out of a distant country for no actual reason and killing half a million of its people and scattering its armed military forces and destroying its entire infrastructure and executing its government and raping its children and elderly in torture chambers and forcing its educated and professional classes to flee to other countries is not, in fact, a surefire way to spread democracy in the Middle East. Read more on U.S. Generals Finally Admit They’re Not In Iraq For ‘Democracy,’ Either…
 

Mike Gravel Wants You to Have to Vote Even More Often

What has crazy old man Mike Gravel been up to since he left the Senate 200 years ago? He founded a nonprofit called “The Democracy Foundation” whose aim is nothing less than the complete and utter destruction of American democracy as we know it. Because Mike Gravel and his little organization want to put you, the people, the stupid, stupid people, in charge. Read more on Mike Gravel Wants You to Have to Vote Even More Often…
 

As Vote for New President Nears, Democracy Disappoints Americans

By Alex Pareene Wonkette Foreign Service Friday, April 20, 2007; Page A01 WASHINGTON, April 19 — This was Tanko Bala’s life before the arrival of democracy: He had a steady job at a factory, a predictable supply of electricity in his home and a few of life’s indulgences. Milk with his morning tea. Movies in the evenings. Read more on As Vote for New President Nears, Democracy Disappoints Americans…
 

Senior Military Officials Suggest Next Iraqi Ruler Be Chosen Via Farcical Aquatic Ceremony

“Senior administration officials have acknowledged to me that they are considering alternatives other than democracy,” said one military affairs expert who received an Iraq briefing at the White House last month and agreed to speak only on condition of anonymity. –New York Times, today. Read more on Senior Military Officials Suggest Next Iraqi Ruler Be Chosen Via Farcical Aquatic Ceremony…
 

Ted Stevens Still Amazed, Terrified by Intercontinental Telegraphy

You ever have one of those days where you just want to quote the Mencken line about Democracy being the theory that the people know what they want and deserve to get it good and hard over and over and over again? Today is one of those days. Good people of Washington and points beyond, we give you Senator Ted Stevens (R-AK), explaining why he voted against “net neutrality”: Read more on Ted Stevens Still Amazed, Terrified by Intercontinental Telegraphy…
 

Rumors on the Internets: Gee But It’s Great To Be Back Home

* Bush pines for his Crawford crib. [HuffPo] * Tell Congress exactly whose house America is. [PowerLine] * Looking for a split-level in a good school district with minimal air raid attacks? Check out a liberal democracy. [Dean’s World] * Move to Massachusetts and break your legs. Don’t cost nothin’. [Q and O] * Or stay home; can you really afford not to? [Boi From Troy] Read more on Rumors on the Internets: Gee But It’s Great To Be Back Home…
 

Cartoon Violence Swings Both Ways

The major question facing our nation today is not immigration or war or abortion or how those motherfucking snakes got on that motherfucking plane — no, it’s whether political cartoonists will ever stop making jokes about Dick Cheney shooting a guy in the face. Though, uh, it’s not much of a question, as our resident cartoon expert The Comics Curmudgeon learns this week — the answer is pretty plainly “no.” Still, though, Today’s Cartoons just really want you to like them. All the cross-hatched bloodshed, after the jump. Read more on Cartoon Violence Swings Both Ways…