Tag: democracy

John Kasich Opposes D.C. Statehood Because, Ew, There Are Democrats There

For a country that was partly founded on the idea of opposing "taxation without representation," it's always been a tad odd that those who live in our very capital, the District of Columbia, pay taxes while being denied representation....
This election is going better than 2008, we think.

Some Dick Is Trying To Keep Bernie Sanders Off The Washington DC Ballot

This month, the DC Democratic Party turned in some ballot papers late for all the Democratic candidates to appear on the DC ballot. All of them. Bernie Sanders, Hillary Clinton, and this hilarious old Rocky De La Fuente guy...

Emory University Kids Very Certain Donald Trump Is Unperson, Double-Plus Ungood

Quick, kids, go to your safe space and hold on to your Trigger Warning, because a bad thing happened on the way to democracy: someone at Emory University in Atlanta chalked the words "Trump 2016" onto a sidewalk. Are students...

Two Adults Talk About America Instead Of Their Dicks: Dem Debate Liveblog!

We were told that the evil dark forces of darkness had conspired to destroy democracy by not inflicting seven zillion Democratic debates on us. That's what we'd heard. There would be maybe one, and it would be about 15 minutes...

Bernie Surprise Winned Michigan! Time For Another Democratic Debate Death Match

When was the last time we had a Democratic debate between Hillary Rodham Sanders and Berndog Clinton or whatever their REAL names are? Were you a little girl at the time? Well you're still a little girl obviously, because...

Cruzmentum Popping Out All Over, Just Like That Thing That Popped Out Of His Nose

Welcome to your Saturday primaries and caucuses, politinerds! Big thumpin' news from the state of Kansas, where Ted Cruz won the Republican caucuses, and as we get ready to post this here bloggy thing, he's also leading in Maine,...

Time For Another Sexxxy Saturday Of Presidential Primaries And Caucuses!

Oh hey, Wonkers, are you ready for some more DEMOCRACY? Because it's time for some states to decide who they want to fight to the electoral death for the title of U.S. American President Of America. We expect that if...

Maryland Rep Opposes DC Statehood Because Of All These Facts He Just Made Up

You know what would be a terrible, horrible, no-good, very bad thing for the country? If Washington DC, the only part of the continental United States that currently gets no actual say in the legislative branch of government, got full...

Why Republicans And CNBC Can F*ck Themselves Right In the Free Market

On Wednesday, Americans watched the third Republican presidential debate. Well, some Americans, anyway. The ones who could afford it. Because, in case you needed reminding, freedom isn't free. And neither was access to a debate among contenders to be the next leader of...
'Merca!

A Children’s Treasury Of Sexy Fourth Of July Patriotic Musical Videos

For your America Day enjoyment, we proudly present this retread/update of a 2011 post by "Wonkette Jr," whose actual identity is lost to time -- truly, we are standing on the shoulders of an unknown giant. Since not even...

The Weekend Stock Photo Report Resigned From Congress Before It Was Cool

In this installment of The Weekend Stock Photo Report with Weekend S. Photo, Aaron Schock will no longer be in Congress but is yes longer be in trouble with the Feds, Barack Obama thinks everyone should be required to...
Dammit, Mama bit into an olive pit.

Peggy Noonan Wishes Obama Would Give Ungrateful ISIS Jihadists A Spank Right On Their Bottoms

Sweet Reagan’s nutsack, the cold chilled her to the bone. The snow beat against the windows of her aerie high above the deserted Manhattan streets, themselves devoid of people, filled only with great drifts of snow. She had sent...
Turn that poo-face upside down, Sarah.

The Sarah Palin Fartknocker Report: Some Votes Are More Equal Than Others

On this week's installment of The Sarah Palin Fartknocker Report, presented by Fartknocker, Governor Quitterpants looks right into the camera and argues with herself for six minutes. Democracy is good, Palin says, and since the Republicans won in 2014,...

Sundays With The Christianists: American History Textbooks For Free Enterprise No Matter What

The Progressive Era presents a tricky challenge for our rightwing Christian U.S. History textbooks. On the one hand, they are firmly in the pro-capitalism cheering section; on the other hand, they can't entirely deny that by the turn of...

DC Approves Living Wage Bill Despite Wal-Mart’s Threat To Take Its Ball And Go Home

Here is a number that has put District of Columbia Mayor Vincent C. Gray in the unenviable position of deciding who writes legislation for his city -- Wal-mart, or the democratically elected city council: 12.50. See, the D.C. council, interested in...

Ohio Secretary of State John Husted Refuses to Comply With Court Order That Would ‘Confuse’ Voters

Remember when Ohio Republican Secretary of State John Husted tried to extend voting hours in Republican counties, and then when everyone bitched and moaned about it he was all FINE, I WILL TURN THIS CAR AROUND AND NO ONE...