Tag Archives: debt ceiling

  enigma wrapped in a mystery cloaked in a yawn

‘Crazy,’ ‘Threatening’ Debt Ceiling Emails Coming From Inside The House! A Wonket Mystery Survey

We love a mystery! And this week’s political mystery (apart from the continued popularity of Sarah Palin) is a real head-scratcher: In January, someone sent House Republicans mean anonymous emails promising DEEP HURTING for any any member of the GOP caucus who voted to increase the debt ceiling. So you are probably asking yourself, “So? It’s an email, what’s the big deal?” and also “Where is that large automobile?” Well here is what the big deal is: the spam was sent to the House members’ super-top-secret confidential private House email addresses, the addresses that they only use for correspondence with each other. Buzzfeed’s John Stanton says, Because of the near-secret nature of lawmakers’ internal email addresses, the emails have raised more than a few eyebrows — and the possibility that one of their own was behind, or at least assisting in the attacks. Can you imagine the drama of House Republicans looking suspiciously at each other, wondering who sent the emails or leaked the list to a debt-ceiling reality denier? Must be crazy paranoid over there right now. More than usual, we mean. Read more on ‘Crazy,’ ‘Threatening’ Debt Ceiling Emails Coming From Inside The House! A Wonket Mystery Survey…
  Legislative Nice Time

John Boehner To Test Unconventional Debt Limit Strategy Of Not Being A Dick

Bad news for anyone who was looking forward to another stupid debt ceiling standoff: popular television personality and Speaker of the Whole House John Boehner says he will hold a House vote tomorrow to raise the borrowing limit of the United States, which he expects will pass only with a big assist from Democrats: House Speaker John Boehner (R-Ohio) made clear the GOP would provide the requisite number of Republican votes for the “clean” measure but that Democrats will be expected to carry the vote. Credit where credit’s due: Boehner is not a dumb politician. He realized long ago that the extreme right, Tea Party wing of the GOP was not, shall we say, strategically minded. He also knew that he personally lacked the ability to yoke their weird gyrating rage to anything legislatively productive. So he basically sat back and said “Whatever, go ahead, see what happens.” And “what happens” is Obama gets re-elected, the GOP’s popularity hits historic lows, and must-pass legislation only moves with Democratic support, which is just embarrassing. This series of obvious failures so diminished the potency of the scorched earth crowd that Boehner felt comfortable saying they’d “lost all credibility,” which was delicious and true. Read more on John Boehner To Test Unconventional Debt Limit Strategy Of Not Being A Dick…
  crazy eyes wide shut

The Debt Ceiling: Is Michele Bachmann Taking Jan Brewer’s Meds?

Could it be that Michele Bachmann has been visiting Jan Brewer’s medicine cabinet? As we noted in our year-end review, the Arizona governor actually said and did some pretty sane stuff in the last year; now it almost looks as if several other prominent teabaggers are engaged in similar flirtations with reality. Just look at this National Journal article about the prospects for a clean Debt Ceiling bill — Bachmann, who like other House Republicans seemed willing to hold a gun to the nation’s head last fall, is not quite going so far as to actually support a clean debt ceiling increase, but she’s also not holding hands with other Tea Party Caucus members and steering the economy toward a cliff this time around: “What I’ve heard from other members,” Bachmann says, “is that this is not going to be the hill that they’re going to die on.” “You have to know when to hold them and you have to know when to fold them,” added Bachmann, who isn’t advocating for a clean debt-ceiling bill. “You just need to be wise to know when to have political fights. It isn’t that our allegiance to principles have changed; it hasn’t at all. You just need to know when your opportunities are and when to exercise your leverage.” Why, that sounds incredibly reasonable and measured, Rep. Bachmann. What’s your dosage, incidentally? Read more on The Debt Ceiling: Is Michele Bachmann Taking Jan Brewer’s Meds?…
  christmas miracles

How Will Congress’s New Budget Murder You And Your Children? A Wonksplainer!

Hey Congress, watcha doing? Making laws and working hard, ahahahhaha, yeah right, pardon us and our humor. The House has already skipped town to go home and await the arrival of White Santa, and the Senate just finished voting on the two-year compromise budget resolution, which passed 57-33. A COMPROMISE?!?! Yep, it seems that Sen. Patty Murray (D-Sneakers) and Rep. Paul Ryan (R-P90X) came together on a very small budget deal that will maybe possibly prevent a government shutdown. Congress has been fellating itself all week because that’s what you do when you accomplish ONE GODDAM THING. We bet you want to know what is in this budget, don’t ya? Let’s wonksplore.  Read more on How Will Congress’s New Budget Murder You And Your Children? A Wonksplainer!…
  things are back to normal and that's terrible

Michele Bachmann Has A Sad Because Government Reopened

Poor Michele Bachmann needs a hug. She called the reopening of the federal government after a two week shutdown “a very sad day,” because mean old Barack Obama “got 100 percent of what he wanted” — you know, a functioning government, and no worldwide economic meltdown due to a debt default. We ask you, is that fair, that he should get all of his dreams, while Michele Bachmann gets nothing but her share of the blame for two weeks of a meaningless tantrum? It’s as if Obama doesn’t want to take any responsibility at all for the House Republicans’ plan to shut down the government. Read more on Michele Bachmann Has A Sad Because Government Reopened…
  When Life Gives you Lemons Burn Life's House Down

Sarah Palin Doubts Barack Obama Has Ever Pulled Lemonade Out Of His Bootstraps

On her FaceSpace page yesterday, Sarah Palin posted this photo of her son and nephew from about 15 years ago, gettin’ all mavericky and free-enterprisey one summer. She had this note: When life gives you lemons, at this point make margaritas. Caving on debt could drive one to drink. This photo of my son and nephew ran in our local newspaper about 15 years ago. I’m betting dollars to doughnuts our president skipped this universal childhood lesson in Economics 101, and perhaps that explains his problem understanding the tragedy to befall us as America drowns in debt. Running a lemonade stand teaches you to progress by the sweat of your brow and live within your means. It taught these boys that it was unacceptable and self-defeating to keep coming back to mama for more money for ingredients needed to concoct a product to sell to the public. Gosh that’s wise! And there’s no way that Barack Obama ever ran a lemonade stand, seeing as how he is Not Really American — he probably had a Roast Dog stand, haw-haw! Also, too, what’s that you’re saying about the economic lessons of lemonade stands? Read more on Sarah Palin Doubts Barack Obama Has Ever Pulled Lemonade Out Of His Bootstraps…
  meet the new boss

Harry Reid Is Your New Grandmaster Of Senate Chess

Harry Reid is not perfect, as he’ll be the first to tell you. Second to tell you will be your Wonket, your Wonkette, and all of les enfants terrible who would leave comments here, if we allowed those. It’s a three-way tie of telling you second. That said, we can’t think of anyone who’s more responsible for last night’s favorable resolution to the government shutdown/debt limit fiasco than Harry Reid. The Senate’s bill, passed last night by the House and signed by our benevolent dictator B. Barry Bamz, reflected Democratic preferences on the timing of the next debt limit and continuing resolution fights. Republicans also agreed to return to regular budget order, so the next time Congress guts social insurance it will be regular and orderly, thank goodness. Let’s explore how Harry Reid got us here, and why he is your latest nominee for Wonkette’s coveted Legislative Badass of the Year award, which will likely never be awarded, because we forgot. Read more on Harry Reid Is Your New Grandmaster Of Senate Chess…
  has he given any thought to defunding obamacare?

Professor Barack Obama’s Outrageous ‘Get Your Butts Back To Work’ Speech Divisive, Hurtful, Professor-y

OMG you guys, this Professor Barack Q. Obama Esquire, PhD., is just so mean, and professory, the way he’s lecturing and rubbing Republicans’ faces in their loss of the 2013 Government Shutdown Bowl. The partisan rhetoric was just overwhelmingly cruel, as the Tyrant told Republicans: “You don’t like a particular policy or a particular president? Then argue for your position. Go out there win an election… Push to change it. But don’t break it. Don’t break what our predecessors spent over two centuries building. That’s not being faithful to what this country’s about.” What’s worse, now he’s talking about passing a budget, immigration, and a farm bill, as if it’s Congress’s job to pass legislation, rather than to repeal it. Did this man even pass high-school civics in whatever Pakistani madrassa he attended? Read more on Professor Barack Obama’s Outrageous ‘Get Your Butts Back To Work’ Speech Divisive, Hurtful, Professor-y…
  same as it ever was

Our Long National Nightmare Put Off A Few Months As Debt Ceiling Raised, Government Funded

On this momentous occasion of the worst possible thing not happening, let’s not concern ourselves overmuch with winners (Democrats, America) and losers (the Tea Party, rank idiocy). Instead, let’s celebrate. Government by extortion has been rejected. A global financial panic has been averted, the United States retains its role as an economic leader, and the dollar remains the world’s reserve currency — for now. Maybe Fitch will still downgrade our credit rating, but who cares? When Standard & Poor’s downgraded us in 2011, borrowing costs actually fell, remember that? Oh, and the same thing happened in Italy. It’s almost as though people don’t trust the judgments of the credit rating agencies who said subprime-backed securities were AAA Would Invest Again can’t-miss licenses to print money. Weird… Where were we? Oh yeah. Democrats win! America wins! Tea Party loses! Ted Cruz 2016! Read more on Our Long National Nightmare Put Off A Few Months As Debt Ceiling Raised, Government Funded…
  that's illegal!

GOP Consultant Alex Castellanos: Ted Cruz Is Doing Bestiality On Poor Little Bunnies

Alex Castellanos, the Cuban American GOP consultant, has correctly identified Ted Cruz’s problem: he can’t stop fucking animals. However! Alex Castellanos was incorrect when he claimed Ted Cruz was doing sex on poor defenseless bunnies. As we all know, Ted Cruz is fucking that chicken. Read more on GOP Consultant Alex Castellanos: Ted Cruz Is Doing Bestiality On Poor Little Bunnies…
  also: walnuts

Lindsey Graham Sorry, So Sorry, Please Accept His Apology

While the “world watches” America threaten to destroy the global economy, it’s “eat your own” time for the Republicans, otherwise known as “the people in charge of making sure America does not destroy the global economy while the world watches.” But the debt ceiling is scheduled to come tumbling down tomorrow and yesterday the House could not even get it together enough to vote on a deal that would stop the country from defaulting on all its debt (until February! When we can do this all again!) and open up all the government stuff it had shut down. And the Senate really wanted them to get that done, so that they could pass their bill that Harry Reid and Mitch McConnell have already agreed upon. There’s an arcane procedural reason the Senate [was] waiting. If it were to advance its own bill through the normal channels, stalling tactics expected to be used by arch-conservatives like Sen. Ted Cruz (R-TX) could delay passage until the weekend. But if the House were to pass a debt limit hike first, the Senate could declare the measure “privileged” and advance it quickly, possibly by amending it and sending it back. So the Senate needed the House to stop being stupid, so they could avoid Ted Cruz definitely being stupid and making everything take forever, because the country’s rent is due tomorrow, people. And now what has come to be known as what passes for reasonable in the GOP is yelling mercy and saying sorry and trying to get someone somewhere to do something for chrissakes because this is not good. And who was the most grownup grownup in the room yesterday? Why, none other than our own belle of the ball, Mr. Senator Lindsey Graham! Read more on Lindsey Graham Sorry, So Sorry, Please Accept His Apology…
  inpeach

Sarah Palin Has ‘Unimpeachable’ Logic (GET IT?) About Why We Should Impeach The President

Sarah Palin has been having a very good week! First, she got to star in the “gamechanging” rally of 200 lunatics #occupying the WWII Memorial and throwing their Barrycades everywhere. Sharing a speaker’s slot with Larry Klayman, noted opponent of Obama’s White Slavery, means she is still completely relevant! Now, an even better thing has happened than getting to stand in front of simple nimrods who are paying attention to her; she has made a thought in her brain, and it actually makes sense. We defy you to find a hole in Sarah Palin’s logic about why the prezzy will be impeached. (Spoiler alert: You can’t! It is that airtight!) Read more on Sarah Palin Has ‘Unimpeachable’ Logic (GET IT?) About Why We Should Impeach The President…
  burning down the house

Your Morning Default Wonkdate: If You Have Not Yet Laid In A Supply Of Survival Seeds, You Should Probably Do That

Because we are terrible nerds, our mental health breaks from our day job on Tuesday consisted of scrolling through our Twitter feed looking for news about the impending debt default and occasionally hitting ourselves in the face with a hammer. Because holy sobbing Majority Leader was Tuesday ever nuts. Let us see if we can sum it up before we feel the need to pick up that hammer again and not stop with the hitting until we pass out. Read more on Your Morning Default Wonkdate: If You Have Not Yet Laid In A Supply Of Survival Seeds, You Should Probably Do That…
  dance like nobody's watching (because the world is going to end)

Your Happy Nice Time Sounds From The Default!

We have heard there is some kind of politics thingie that is happening where one of the political “parties” is maybe going to end the entire universe if it does not get its way about a thing? We aren’t really sure how any of that works, giggle! Well, now some journalists are reporting that the “Republicans,” who are one of the only two parties represented in our system of government except for Bernie Sanders who is a communist from Vermont, are going to do a vote on the “government debt ceiling” that they have already been warned that our president, you may have heard of him, that handsome black guy?, has already said he will not sign because of how they are acting like Somali pirates. And then they are going to leave town maybe! And then someone on Twitter, some @7im fellow, tweeted this Liz Phair song, and the next 15 minutes of our life became quite obvious. READ MORE Read more on Your Happy Nice Time Sounds From The Default!…
  eastbound and down

Dozens Of Truckers Show Up To Completely Shut Down DC; Constitution Likely To Survive Anyway

In a development that took nobody by surprise, the Great Big Trucker Siege of Washington DC has drawn several thousand fewer participants than the several thousand truckers that the organizers had hoped would show up and block traffic on the Beltway all weekend, for Freedom. Fox News reports that “dozens, not thousands,” of tractor-trailer rigs have arrived for the “Truckers Ride for the Constitution” protest that was supposed to have saved America from corruption, members of Congress who have violated their oaths, high fuel prices, and the Antichrist in the White House. Read more on Dozens Of Truckers Show Up To Completely Shut Down DC; Constitution Likely To Survive Anyway…
  what is your opinion of dying in a fire?

Republican Party’s Favorability Hits All-Time Low, Proving That We Must Repeal Obamacare

You see that picture up there, with the jaggedy lines? It’s a “graph,” and it shows that 28% of Americans have a favorable view of the Republican Party, according to Gallup. Maybe you think that’s pretty good, considering that the Republican party can barely hide their contempt for most of America, and also that they’re wrong about everything, plus or minus a thing (maybe, sometimes). But it’s actually any party’s worst poll result in the 20 years since Gallup first sounded the depths of America’s hatred for the people they repeatedly vote into office. While we don’t know for sure, there’s good circumstantial evidence that Republicans’ historically low favorability is related to their refusal to fund the government unless Democrats let them make Obamacare worse. Say… all this talk of polls and approval has made us wonder: How are people liking their death panels so far? Read more on Republican Party’s Favorability Hits All-Time Low, Proving That We Must Repeal Obamacare…