George W. Bush And Bill Clinton Are Not Going To Debate If People Are Going To Get All Excited About It
Thursday, November 5th, 2009
Hot on the heels of yesterday’s impossibly exciting news of the opportunity to pay at least $70 to hear Presidents George W. Bush and Bill Clinton sitting in adjacent armchairs and mumble talking points in a vaguely conversational rhythm: a cancellation of that exact thing! Apparently everyone was too into it, and this is why it had to end before it began. According to some Clinton spokesperson: “This event … was supposed to be a discussion between the two former presidents, and has been cancelled because it was not being billed as such by an overeager promoter.” How dare the promoter describe the event in such a way as to attempt to convince people to attend? [New York Post]












MCCAIN STILL GAY FOR JOE THE PLUMBER: At a Walnuts rally today: “We had a good debate last night. I thought I did pretty well, but let’s have a little straight talk: the real winner last night was Joe the Plumber.” Indeed! Well at least he probably got laid last night. Beyond that? Joe must love having his tax records and (lack of) plumbing licenses scoured by the media, too. He’s already been vetted more than Sarah Palin, who proved to be sucky. [
So uh how did that whole deal go? Let’s go the the twelve dozen pundits gathered around a table in the CNN dungeon and see what they have to say, while Ken Layne eagerly watches the CSPAN to see if John McCain flees the stage immediately (again).
Well hey people, this is the last liveblog of a debate — the number is actually 50, no joke — in this election season. This has been a complete abortion of time. Ours, yours, God’s, ACORN’s. Remember Mike Gravel yelling at Joe Biden and really everyone else in that debate last April, which was 40 years ago? Well, that was actually in this SAME ELECTION CYCLE, and now it’s over forever because of the Economy, here’s a send-off into the hobo space jungle. And now we wait for the day…
Check out that ACORN squirrel illegally registering black Richard Simmons to vote in the swing state of New York. These liberal tracheotomy squirrels, can you even believe them. They should all be thrown in a bathtub of battery acid and Truck Nutz. Such things will be topics at this evening’s debate. Let’s see what the lamers on CNN are saying before the debate. BRING YR PANTS.
Wait, we only have an hour left to put together a drinking game? That’s not enough time to create high-quality alcoholic comedy! Well, we shall do our best — if by “our best” you mean, “We’ll just throw together a quick phrase/drink list and you can give it a try, at home!”