Hey John Edwards, want to debate Karl Rove in San Francisco for some reason? Sure why the hell not! That’s what’s going on today in San Francisco, where the two are engaging in a discussion about the economy at a meeting of commercial bankers. No Cameras. This is only Edwards’ second appearance since admitting that he banged a dingbat f-list 1980s New York socialite, “Rielle.” He can slip in to San Francisco and debate “finance” with a Republican fraud-lord for an unusually high speaking fee very, very stealthily, because most media outlets in the area are busy covering the current Gays vs. Blacks vs. Mormons Marriage War that has set the quaint seaside metropolis ablaze. [ABC7]

We posted this charming debate scene from The Dark Knight way back in May 2008. But it has gained new relevance this week, because we can now reveal that John McCain used the actual script of this fictional comic-book-character debate between The Penguin and The Batman during Wednesday’s bizarre spectacle. [Look See We Posted This In May/And Boing Boing, Today!]

Here’s your new Obama Campaign spot, and it’s got so much bug-eyed weirdness and nervous blinking from McCain! Also, serious policy stuff, what with how Walnuts is always loving Bush Junior. [Gawker]

A horrified America watched John McCain stagger up from his debate chair last night and turn into a monster. He almost caught our Barack Obama! What was happening? Clearly, the special anti-monster juice McCain drinks before public appearances was starting to wear off. They got him in the titanium-lined SWAT van just before he fully transformed. But fully transformed into what? MORE »

WE MISS YOU TOO, MITT: “What happens tonight is that the momentum shifts. It goes from being all Obama to being all McCain. And you’re going to see over the coming days a slow but sure increase in John McCain’s standing and narrowing in the polls. They’re going to be writing about John McCain comeback kid.” [Mitt Romney on Fox News]

Ah, snap polls. Here is how they work: A news-gathering organization rounds up a bunch of plumbers, all named Joe, and puts them in a lockbox where they are forced to look at two people arguing for 90 minutes. At the end of this torture session, people ask themselves, “Who blinked less? I’ll go with that guy,” and voila, you have your snap poll telling you Barack Obama won again. MORE »

It’s the photograph we have all been waiting for, the one you have already seen on the million frigging blogs you check every morning. John McCain makes very silly faces, indeed! Here he is vomiting, or making a lizard face, or trying to grab Barack Obama’s ass, or who knows. Re-enacting this commercial maybe?

Thanks to Jed Report/DailyKos for suffering through this long enough to make the awful clip you see today.

Thank you for staying with Wonkette for our special sexy late-night post-debate fun! John McCain and Cindy McCain have left the building! Barack and Michelle are, as usual, still there. Are they? Hey, C-SPAN, could you zoom in? Here is Part I, and Part II, and Part III, and Part IV. (Oh and Sara started another Part V, which is here, and now she has stomped off to bed.) Did you know the ACORNS will destroy your fabric? Please keep your fabric clean, and let’s please keep bums from making money trying to register voters, and let’s, uh, move on, to the deal. GO RALPH NADER. MORE »

• BREAKING OBAMA WINS DEBATE BY LANDSLIDE: Yikes, Obama won by 58%, he has won Three In A Row, according to All Networks, CNN, CBS, Everything. [Katie Couric Live Right Now, Online, Interviewing Joe the Plumber!]

How drunk are you people yet? Joe the Plumber is going to be elected President of America, because he has suffered so greatly for all of us, and gotten all of us drunk by being mentioned fourteen billion times by each presidential candidate so far. Bob Schieffer is being a hardass, oh boy! He even asked about Barack Obama’s terrorist pals, and John McCain said he wouldn’t have had to be so mean to Obama if he’d gone to McCain’s abandoned Bingo halls in Metairie. MORE »