Good news from Variety, America’s #1 source on third-tier cable news channels:

MSNBC is trying out radio personality Michael Smerconish as the network looks for a permanent replacement for Don Imus. MORE »

Phew! The statute of limitations is up and the wingnutty “Virginia Tech happened because America forsook God” videos are rolling out. This American Family Radio production ropes Jeff Chamblee into reading some essay that’s been making the e-mail rounds, framed as a letter to God about why all these campus massacres happen. The answer:

Reply: “Dear concerned student. I am not allowed in schools. Sincerely, God.”

Then follow some examples of things America’s done to mock God, like:

“Then, someone said ‘Let’s let our daughters have abortions if they want, and they won’t even have to tell their parents. And we said, ‘that’s a grand idea.’”

If only Cho Seung-Hi had told his parents that he needed an abortion! Or something.

Yes, of course, the worst one-man massacre in American history happened on Monday. This is still the least funny thing you’ve seen all week. ParkRidge47, the Democratic consultant who created the Obama/Hillary/Apple/Orwell “1984″ video, is back with a… I guess you’ve call it a “parody” of The Office. Not even the good Office - the remake with the physically attractive American actors.

So what was your favorite part? The static images of despair? The ill-fitting callback to stuff Wolfowitz said in 2003? The fat guy who used the word “sex”? Or did you get bored and start watching the awesome Peter Gabriel documentary in the “related video” window? MORE »

David Brooks was right: Red and blue America are different. In blue America, if you buck your party on the Iraq War, you get challenged by a nondescript-looking anti-war liberal. In red America, the gauntlet gets tossed down by a guy who looks like a cross between Sam Brownback and that doctor in the Spider-Man movies who eventually turns into the the Lizard.

Attorney General Jon Bruning has changed his mind. He now is considering challenging fellow Republican Chuck Hagel in Nebraska’s U.S. Senate primary next year.
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Hagel helped Senate Democrats approve a $123 billion spending bill that includes a call for U.S. troops to begin withdrawing this year, with a goal of ending combat operations by March 31, 2008. MORE »

John McCain’s YouTube channel is streaming a pre-pre-preview of his official campaign announcement, featuring exciting video of those increasingly-rare moments when his blood is actually flowing to all of his body parts. Unfortunately, no one in the McCain mothership noticed that YouTube’s video previews capture the midpoint of the clips and turn them into static screenshots. Hence this deflated-sounding promise of sauce, beans and meat products for anyone who sidles up to the Straight Talk Express.
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(Explanation for that photo: Here.)

As of this moment I am an ex-Wonkette guest blogger. Phew. Between the 12 posts per day, the flood of e-mail tips, the Tammy Bruce interview, and the manatee-paced blog software, I ran myself ragged this week. I have a few people to thank for that.

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After a week of guest-blogging, I know understand why Wonkette spends so much time clawing at Katherine Harris: We have to do 12 posts a day, and she’s good for three to four. Before noon. Ignoring her would be like turning down manna on the road to the promised land.

Speaking of insane similies!

U.S. Rep. Katherine Harris’ campaign has called for an apology from Democratic National Committee Chairman Howard Dean.
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“Thank God for Bill Nelson, because we’d have another crook in the United States Senate if weren’t for him,” Dean said. “He’s going to beat the pants off Katherine Harris, who didn’t understand that it is ethically improper to be the chairman of the campaign and count the votes at the same time. This is not Russia. And she is not Stalin.”

It’s pretty clear that Dean is evoking that (possibly fictitious) Stalin knee-slapper, “It’s not the people who vote that count. It’s the people who count the votes.” Who cares! Someone’s stepped into a controversy and it’s not Katherine Harris!

That said… could Dean be outsmarting the GOP? (For once?)

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You’re going to get it e-mailed to you eventually, so just bite the bullet and watch Delegate Eleanor Holmes Norton on the Colbert Report. Be proud: She gives as good as she gets and gets into the flow of even Colbert’s most caustic jokes. MORE »

There’s been the right amount of fuss about Bleu Copas, the Arabic translator who was outed by anonymous e-mails and then dismissed from the U.S. Army under “Don’t Ask, Don’t Tell.” But there hasn’t been enough attention paid to this side note:

On Dec. 2, investigators formally interviewed Copas and asked if he understood the military’s policy on homosexuals, if he had any close acquaintances who were gay, and if he was involved in community theater.

Question: What if he had been involved in a production of “HMS Pinafore”? Actually, no, that’s not a very good question. MORE »

For some reason, polls by Rasmussen Reports always give Bush a higher approval rating than other leading polls - Gallup, Harris, Fox News. That’s probably the Reason “The Beltway Boys” co-host and journeyman pundit Fred Barnes cites them whenever he wants to re-make the case that Bush is a history-shiftin’ rebel who will lead us joyfully into the Rapture. From last Saturday’s episode of “The Beltway Boys”:

BARNES: Mort, have you been watching Bush’s presidential approval rating not surge, but creep up? MORE »

[UPDATE: Jesus, this post. A warning to everyone who wants to tip Wonkette - don't send a tip if you're not willing to see it printed. If it's printed, lay off the multiple emails demanding retraction.] A well-connected reader passes this on: The search criteria reseachers use inside one of the party committees. These are some of the terms the vetters punch into various data banks when checking out whether the party can accept a donation from a donor - to make sure, for example, that the would be-benefactor isn’t some kind of uppity queer. MORE »