Tag Archives: david gregory

  Here have some news n stuff

NASA Found This Amazing Monster Black Hole Inside A Teeny Galaxy, No Big

Pretttttttty
Image Credit: NASA, ESA, STScI-RCC14-41a We have SCIENCE! that is so cool, we’re going to start with that today. (Look up. Look at the science. Isn’t it pretty?) We also have a Very Interesting Theory, a super absurd conspiracy theory, the future of travel, and a guy who races the subway … and wins. Read more on NASA Found This Amazing Monster Black Hole Inside A Teeny Galaxy, No Big…
  first day of school

Chuck Todd Meets The Press, Needs To Improve Listening Skills

Chuck Todd is so excited, you guys! It’s his first week as the new host of Meet the Press. That other guy with two first names failed his way into a $4 million buyout and NBC, looking to bring back the powerhouse once steered by Tim Russert, took the opportunity to slip Tim’s son Luke and Morning Misery Joe Scarborough in along with Chuck to lend the proper gravitas. We couldn’t wait to see Chuck’s debut Sunday morning, by which we mean we slept in and caught the late rerun. Read more on Chuck Todd Meets The Press, Needs To Improve Listening Skills…
  Shameless self-promotion

Meet The Press Is About To Get So Much Worse; You Need This Coffee Mug More Than Ever

Buy it now
Do you need yet one more reason to ignore NBC’s “Meet the Press” because you can’t get enough of John McCain and the weekly parade of the same old white dudes saying the same old white dude things? What the heck is wrong with you? FINE, be that way. Have one more reason. Heck, have two, courtesy of the New York Post’s Page Six: Read more on Meet The Press Is About To Get So Much Worse; You Need This Coffee Mug More Than Ever…
  If it's Sunday David Gregory's sitting around unemployed

David Gregory Booted From NBC, At Least He Has $4 Million To Keep Him Company

This is definitely the saddest news of the day. No, the week. No, the century. Basically, it is the saddest thing ever. EVER. NBC’s David Gregory, best known for asking really great questions on “Meet the Press” and getting his objective journalist on by dancing with Karl Rove at the 2007 nerd prom, has been sacked. Ousted. Booted. Shit-canned. Read more on David Gregory Booted From NBC, At Least He Has $4 Million To Keep Him Company…
  If it's Sunday it's gee what else is on TV?

NBC Hires Expert To Figure Out Mystery of Why David Gregory’s Show Sucks So Hard

If you are a Reglar ‘Merican person who has occasionally flipped to NBC’s Meet the Press on a hungover Sunday morning, thinking the vapid tones of whatever panel of white men plus John McCain is appearing that day might somehow relieve your headache and nausea, only to find it worsened when you were compelled to throw things at your television and scream “THIS IS WHY WE CAN’T HAVE NICE THINGS!!!!” then you already know exactly what is wrong with NBC’s has-been Sunday talk show. Like every other Sunday morning talk show, it is, at best, the same rotating cast of a dozen or so professional beltway pontificators explaining how Democrats are like THIS, but Republicans are like THAT, with the occasional “some say” or “both sides do it” interruption from the milquetoast moderator — in this case, David Gregory, who plays a Very Serious Journalist on the tee vee, even though he’s really always wanted to be a dancer. Sometimes, he awakens from his half-coma enough to journosplain who is and isn’t a JournalistTM, as defined by David Gregory. (It feels a tad superfluous, even malicious, to remind you once more than David Gregory was a back-up dancer to Karl Rove at the annual gathering of Very Serious Journalists Stroking Themselves Approvingly in Tuxedos, also known as the White House Correspondents Dinner. It is superfluous and malicious, but we just did it anyway because Jesus H. Christ, if you are a back-up dancer to “MC Rove,” you do not ever EVER NEVER NOT EVER get to define who is and is not a journalist.) If, however, you are NBC, you are apparently shocked and amazed that Gregory’s show is getting its ass ratings-kicked by, among others, Pretend to Face the Nation, hosted by practically dead Bob Schieffer. How could this once great show — and by once great, of course, we merely mean that it used to be the top rated show on Sunday when it was hosted by Tim Russert, who at least had a personality, plus a chalkboard — no longer be revered or, like, watched? Time to call in A Expert: Last year, the network undertook an unusual assessment of the 43-year-old journalist, commissioning a psychological consultant to interview his friends and even his wife. The idea, according to a network spokeswoman, Meghan Pianta, was “to get perspective and insight from people who know him best.”* We’re going to take a quick commercial break so we can all die of laughter. When we return, for those who managed to survive, we’ll try to imagine exactly how this “consultation” works. Then we will die of laughter some more. Read more on NBC Hires Expert To Figure Out Mystery of Why David Gregory’s Show Sucks So Hard…
  four and twenty blackburns baked in a nye

Marsha Blackburn Wins Climate Change ‘Debate’ With Bill Nye! (Does Not Fling Actual Poo)

So the slightly hyped Big Climate Change “Debate” between science education advocate and teevee guy Bill Nye and Tennessee congresspillock Marsha Blackburn on Sunday’s Meet The Press actually turned out to be a whopping 13-minute segment, which was short enough that no real details could be explained, yet long enough to make a viewer yearn for the sweet release of death. The only good thing to be said for it was that host David Gregory framed it as a debate on climate change policy, although of course Blackburn predictably insisted the very question of human-caused climate change is still open. We suspect that in 2114 people boating through the canals of Nuevo Miami will still be arguing about whether the evidence is sufficient yet. Read more on Marsha Blackburn Wins Climate Change ‘Debate’ With Bill Nye! (Does Not Fling Actual Poo)…
  blackburn singin' in the dread of nye

Bill Nye, Science Guy, To Perform His Most Dangerous Feat Yet

Fresh off his not-really-a-debate (though he won) appearance with creationist Ken Ham, Science Guy Bill Nye will take on another leading proponent of nonscience, Tennessee Rep. Marsha Blackburn, in a not-really-a-debate appearance on this Sunday’s Meet The Press on NBC. As we said about the Ham On Nye show, it’s not really going to prove anything, and more to the point, unlike questions like “is Neil Degrasse Tyson cuter than Carl Sagan?” or “Was Alexander Hamilton a good President?”* science is simply not a matter of opinion. On the other hand, Bill Nye is super awesome and probably better at communicating about science to a popluar audience than a real climate scientist would be, and we think it will be fun to watch him take Blackburn’s illogic apart. So as infotainment, it will be worth watching, even though we share most of Wonket alumnus Alex Pareene’s qualms that by even holding the “debate,” Meet the Press “is responsible for taking the anti-science side seriously enough to present it as a legitimate and defensible view.” But hell, that’s pretty much where a lot of viewers already are. They could only benefit from hearing it from a guy who’s pretty adept at explaining how science works, and it’s not like refusing to engage the anti-science crowd has shown them to be illegitimate. Better to take their nonsense apart and make it clear why it’s nonsense. Read more on Bill Nye, Science Guy, To Perform His Most Dangerous Feat Yet…
  party of personal responsibility

Ted Cruz Doesn’t See Why Democrats Won’t Accept His Reasonable Plan To Only Kill Obamacare A Little Bit

Sen Ted Cruz (R-Green Eggs) opened a new front in the War On Logic yesterday, Cruzplaining on NBC’s Meet the Press that he has already compromised a whole heck of a lot by only wanting to defund the Affordable Care Act instead or repealing it altogether. And hey, the House GOP has even compromised a second time now — they’re willing to settle for just delaying it for a year! Why can’t the Democrats just bend a little bit and agree to just not let the 2010 law go forward? They’re so darned inflexible! Read more on Ted Cruz Doesn’t See Why Democrats Won’t Accept His Reasonable Plan To Only Kill Obamacare A Little Bit…
  journamalism

American Government Propaganda is Not Actually Propaganda, Says Government Official

Congress has worse ratings than cockroaches, Genghis Khan, and Nickelback. More than half of Americans think that the country is heading in the wrong direction. Over half of Americans think of Edward Snowden as a whistle-blower rather than a traitor. Should the government: a) take a serious look at the country, its policies, and the general desires of the American people to consider how its institutions can better tailor their various goals and strategies to people’s needs or b) convince the American people that their opinions, needs, and desires are wrong. The answer, of course, is b) convince the American people that their opinions, needs, and desires are wrong. From Foreign Policy: Read more on American Government Propaganda is Not Actually Propaganda, Says Government Official…
  Our Cold Dead Hands

Gun News Roundup: Wayne LaPierre Is A Vile Sack of Garbage, Plus Some Things You Might Have Not Already Known

Greetings, representatives of the People’s Glorious Wonkitburo! We thought we would start this edition of Our Cold Dead Hands with a gun-related tale that could have had terrible and tragic consequences for world diplomacy, but because no one was hit with any shotgun pellets, turned out to be amusing in a “Holy flurking shnit” sort of way. It seems that back in 2006, Mahmoud Ahmadinejad was in New York for the United Nations General Assembly, that forum every year where the world’s craziest leaders get a chance to stand up and denounce the Zionists or water fluoridation or whatever plot their fortune tellers see in a bunch of goat entrails spread on a rock in their backwards desert kingdoms. One day during the confab, Ahmadinejad and his entourage were getting into their cars outside his hotel. Nearby, a Secret Service agent (the Secret Service guards foreign dignitaries when they are in the U.S.) was adjusting a shotgun mounted on the side of his Suburban when the gun went off. Luckily no one was hurt. Our favorite part of the story is that Ahmadinejad heard the shotgun blast, looked around, and seemingly thought to himself “Gunfire? Oh right, I’m in America.” Then he got into his car and drove to the U.N. because again, America, what are you going to do, amiright? Anyway, everyone close your eyes and try to imagine the nightmare of an international incident that would have been a Secret Service agent accidentally blowing away Iran’s leader on U.S. soil. During the Bush Administration, no less. And the Secret Service, you would think those guys would be be firearms experts! But no one was hurt or killed, so it falls under the rubric of an amusing, if frightening, little anecdote. It is not much, but we take what we can get at Wonkette. Read more on Gun News Roundup: Wayne LaPierre Is A Vile Sack of Garbage, Plus Some Things You Might Have Not Already Known…
  history's greatest monster

What Is Chelsea Clinton Hiding About Monica Lewinsky?

Everyone knows that Chelsea Clinton is the world’s most boring human being — though she did grow up to be quite a fetching member of the female species, suck it Rush Limbaugh. She is even more boring than Luke Russert, and possibly has less-notable insights! But were you aware that the reason she is such a flop on NBC, which hired her for “journalism,” is not that she is not particularly a journalist, or experienced, or fluffed up by her famous name to a rank she might have actually earned someday — no, it is only those things a little bit! The real reason, according to Buzzfeed, is because she will not tell us how it felt to be a 13-year-old whose Dad was getting impeached by Newt Gingrich for cigar-banging a plump luscious vixen, “claiming” that it’s “none of our business.” Buzzfeed has some well-considered and not at all creepy thoughts on this! Read more on What Is Chelsea Clinton Hiding About Monica Lewinsky?…
  passive-aggressive twitters

Rand Paul Campaign Goin’ Nuts, Suddenly Terrified Of David Gregory

David Gregory is a professional cocktail-hour name-dropping titty child who only got into television so he could meet and dance with and suck up to famous people — mostly “dance with.” So this is a good move by Rand Paul, if he’s trying to bargain with David Gregory, who just wants the most famous person of the week on his teevee show and will probably end up allowing that person to write the entire show’s vanilla script, if the person demands. Is that too harsh on David Gregory? Fine, Rand Paul’s just as big of a pussy. Now it’s journalistically objective. UPDATE: Now it’s official: Rand Paul will not be on the teevee show that you sleep through, according to Dave Weigel, who lies about everything. [Twitter] Read more on Rand Paul Campaign Goin’ Nuts, Suddenly Terrified Of David Gregory…
  ministry of truth

Why Is Weird Bill Clinton Still So Paranoid?

Haha Bill Clinton, who even is this guy? Not that you would even know this by reading the corrosive falsehoods spread by the so-called media, but back in the 90s, he was the victim survivor of a “vast right-wing conspiracy,” a phrase he and his wife cold made up that quickly became one of the Clintons’ buzzy catchphrases. And Bill Clinton’s vast right-wing conspiracy, or BCVRWC as it is known in the BCVRWC secret dungeon planning control chamber, is as sinister and formidable as ever! Its henchmen are everywhere, and they continue to accuse Barack Obama of murdering Vince Foster. Clinton will simply not stand for this! Read more on Why Is Weird Bill Clinton Still So Paranoid?…
  wonk'd

Staycation: Famous For DC People Remain In DC, Even In July!

So we did a midsummer slow news day’s Wonk’d yesterday and what do you know, another billion Wonk’d sightings arrived in out Tips Box this morning. It’s like you people can be easily manipulated by suggestion. “Here are some Wonkette readers sending us Wonk’d items … this means you must do the same, reader.” And it works! (Next time we’ll subliminally make you do something vulgar in the Reflecting Pool.) Anyway, enjoy these eyewitness reports of Maria Shriver, Ralph Nader, Rahm Emanuel and Others doing whatever it is they do, in Washington! Read more on Staycation: Famous For DC People Remain In DC, Even In July!…
  seething hatred

McCain Can’t Even Tell Polite Lie About Supporting Palin In 2012

How deeply must you despise your former running mate — the person you wanted America to accept as a perfectly good and safe president-in-waiting, just a few months ago — to be unable to fake a quick “Sure I support her” on a Sunday news-chat show? Here’s Old Walnuts McCain utterly unable to answer a simple question about Palin from David Gregory, because good lord, Palin is absolute human garbage. You’ve got to be some real dumb trash when even Republicans won’t support you. [YouTube/USA Today] Read more on McCain Can’t Even Tell Polite Lie About Supporting Palin In 2012…
  pretend boyfriends

CHUCK TODD TO DO MOST THINGS FOR NBC NEWS: Whoa hey it’s press release day at your Wonkette! “NBC News announced today that Chuck Todd has been named Chief White House correspondent,” NBC News announced in a press release. He will remain NBC News Political Director and will also become a regular contributor to Meet The Press, with David Gregory, who used to be Chief White House correspondent. Chuck Todd, everyone! [Sigh]. We would pay millions of dollars just to watch Chuck Todd describe Lake County, Indiana precinct returns at midnight one more time. Read more on …