December 12, 2013
Newark Mayor Cory Booker, the caped-crusading, embattled-cat recovering, amateur fireman, Mr Plow come to life, twitter-master and media darling, won the Democratic primary for New Jersey’s open Senate seat yesterday despite a big ol’ Hate-On from liberal writers everywhere, including our own erstwhile wonkets. But why all the hate, haters?
Lord but is this NSA shitfuffle giving some of our elected officials and political figures a chance to do their best impressions of spaghetti-western-era Clint Eastwood (which for our money is the best era Clint Eastwood – we would rather forget about the old-man-ranting-to-an-empty-chair era.) Let us take a look at this children’s treasury of [...]
OH BOY OH BOY THE DEBATES ARE COMING! This week will be the first time that Barack Obama and Mitt Romney get on TV and have a thoughtful, earnest exchange about how their different visions will translate into policies to help the great country they both love ha ha we can’t even finish this sentence [...]
Sexboat toe goblin Dick Morris has some thoughts on the typically thuggish Chicago regime, and how they “Rough Up Gallup for Polls They Don’t Like.” Get ready you guys, because it is terrifying! In a scene right out of a typical authoritarian regime, Fox News reports that “employees at the venerable Gallup polling firm suggested [...]
What did Donald Trump use to do for “fun,” before he started accusing Barack Obama of being a Kenyan space lizard with lousy SAT scores? Oh, you know, he would drunk dial David Axelrod and beg him for a job, of course. Zounds! Probably best to take a pinch from the snuff box before you [...]
Democrats in Congress were too afraid even to try to pass an extension of the Bush tax cuts for the middle class before the election, because Republicans saying anything at all about Democrats and taxes is very scary! Of course, Republicans still used this anyway, because they have no problem turning anything and everything into [...]
Look at all the president’s men having so much fun on their Fantasy Lacrosse League while poor people talk about their troubles, with Obama!
The New York Times posted an article last night entitled “Obama Advisers Weigh Ad Assault Against the GOP,” which detailed the Democratic Party’s plan to propagate the notion that Teabagger ideas have taken over the Republican Party, based on unnamed sources. So, hey, welcome to the show! Your librul media has been sort of doing [...]
President Obama, like many people, was very happy that Proposition 8 was overturned yesterday. But no, that does not mean he supports gay marriage, David Axelrod says. “The president does oppose same-sex marriage, but he supports equality for gay and lesbian couples, and benefits and other issues, and that has been effectuated in federal agencies [...]
David Axelrod held a briefing today with “reporters and opinion-makers,” you guys! He just wanted to get everyone together to remind them that the Democratic leadership made colossal, avoidable, unacceptable errors that completely ruined their agenda: “The White House had no contingency plan for health care reform if Democrat Martha Coakley lost the special election [...]
If you want to see DC’s most famous stars, you are best off visiting exotic locals such as the BWI airport and New York City’s Central Park. There you can find two of the most lovable party hounds in the history of American government! If you must stay in town, though, you might just spot [...]
Those who listen to the elitist Chicago street organizer public-radio program Wait Wait … Don’t Tell Me got a special treat this weekend, as Barack Obama’s personal Rasputin, David Axelrod, appeared on the show to describe how much this Socialist White House hates our nation’s fake-breasted gay-hating soft-porn models. [NewsPoliticsNews/NPR]
Barack Obama’s mustachioed Merlin, David Axelrod, hates Dick Cheney’s fat hateful ass. This, in itself, is hardly novel: Everyone hates Dick Cheney’s fat hateful ass. But Axelrod gets to go on Meet the Press and call Cheney a dick as part of his Administration job. [USA Today]
The Obama camp’s internal investigation report about its contact with Blaggy’s office regarding the “fuckin’ valuable” Senate seat “thing” has been released. Written by Obama’s fancy lawyer, Greg Craig, the report comes in at a brisk 4.5 pages. No one on the Obama team, according to the Obama team report, ever discussed any sort of [...]