David Axelrod held a briefing today with “reporters and opinion-makers,” you guys! He just wanted to get everyone together to remind them that the Democratic leadership made colossal, avoidable, unacceptable errors that completely ruined their agenda: “The White House had no contingency plan for health care reform if Democrat Martha Coakley lost the special election in Massachusetts, and officials did not discuss the possibility a Democratic loss would dramatically imperil their legislative efforts, a top adviser said today.” Hmm, perhaps it was only after Coakley’s loss that they learned of this whole “60 votes” conundrum in the Senate, and several hours after that did their calculations conclude that “59″ was a lesser number than “60,” not accounting for the multiplier effect. [TPM]

If you want to see DC’s most famous stars, you are best off visiting exotic locals such as the BWI airport and New York City’s Central Park. There you can find two of the most lovable party hounds in the history of American government! If you must stay in town, though, you might just spot the departing rump of one very famous ex-Clinton staffer … MORE »

Those who listen to the elitist Chicago street organizer public-radio program Wait Wait … Don’t Tell Me got a special treat this weekend, as Barack Obama’s personal Rasputin, David Axelrod, appeared on the show to describe how much this Socialist White House hates our nation’s fake-breasted gay-hating soft-porn models. [NewsPoliticsNews/NPR]

Barack Obama’s mustachioed Merlin, David Axelrod, hates Dick Cheney’s fat hateful ass. This, in itself, is hardly novel: Everyone hates Dick Cheney’s fat hateful ass. But Axelrod gets to go on Meet the Press and call Cheney a dick as part of his Administration job. [USA Today]

The Obama camp’s internal investigation report about its contact with Blaggy’s office regarding the “fuckin’ valuable” Senate seat “thing” has been released. Written by Obama’s fancy lawyer, Greg Craig, the report comes in at a brisk 4.5 pages. No one on the Obama team, according to the Obama team report, ever discussed any sort of quid pro quo with Blaggy. MORE »

By March or April or whenever it was that she got fired, everybody knew that Patti Solis Doyle was personally responsible for every single thing that went wrong with the Clinton campaign, except for the things Mark Penn and Bill Clinton and the candidate herself and even Harold Ickes were responsible for. Ms. Doyle was banished to her native Chicago uranium mines with only her public humiliation to keep her company, until the Obama campaign hired her, with predictable results: the Clinton people went insane with rage. MORE »

In yet another sign of media bias against Hillary Clinton, The Media is refusing to take the blame for calling Barack Obama a slick-talking handsome word stealing wizard just a few days ago. After all, wasn’t it the media that held a conference call with itself and showed itself some YouTubes of Massachusetts Governor Deval Patrick saying one thing Thomas Jefferson said and then Handsome Barry saying the same thing Jefferson said? And wasn’t it the media that started hollering about how “When an author plagiarizes from another author there is damage done to two different parties. One is to the person he plagiarized from. The other is to the reader”? No? Blast these Internets! That was all Howard Wolfson, the Clinton campaign’s communications director. But of course the media was the one foolish enough to go off and repeat everything some dumb communications director said. MORE »

* Heard on the Hill: Times Magazine runs a picture of Obama and David Axelrod together in Obama’s Senate office, in possible violation of election law… Capitol Police fail to rescue injured squirrels. [Roll Call]
* Reliable Source: Some celebrities are taller than you’d expect, and vice versa. [WP]
* Yeas and Nays: Tom Tancredo is against sending some tv person to a Mexican prison… Get ready for the DC “Commission on Fashion Arts and Events,” to celebrate the worst-dressed town on the eastern seaboard! … Kerry loses to Bush in car chase… Hillary apparently only person in Washington not willing to make nice with unfunny old jackass Don Imus. [Examiner]
* Inside the Beltway: WALNUTS! needs to grow a goatee to complete his gradual transition into an evil totalitarian film villain. [WT]
* The Sleuth: Now you are allowed to sympathize with Elizabeth Edwards without giving her husband money. [WP]
* Washington Whispers: Newt Gingrich now a tree-hugging hippie… Chuck Hagel has a book coming out about how he’s maybe running for president maybe. [USN&WR]

* First Bush presser of ‘07 “confirms” there are Iranians in Iraq. [WP, NYT]
* This Iranian “Delta Force” is possibly operating outside of Iranian government control. Rambo couldn’t be reached for comment. [LAT]
* Debate over the Iraq “I told you so” resolution went pretty quick. Waiting for John Murtha to count up the $100 billion, however, will take longer. [WP, NYT]
* Rudy Giuliani might have to stop telling people to “get motivated” if he wants to “get elected.” [WP]
* Libby Trial bloggers almost like real reporters, but more witty. Oh so witty. [NYT]
* David Axelrod channels the political discourse of the angels, hangs with the brothers. [WP]
* With a loaded husband and a well-connected brother-in-law, you too can be a Democratic lobbyist! [WSJ]