Tag: dana loesch

Why would he say that? Cause he's a life ruiner. He ruins people's lives.

Rightwing Loons Dana Loesch And Jim Hoft All Out Of Love After Lewandowski Arrest

Elections can be so stressful on friendships. One friend supports Candidate A, while the other supports Candidate Shithead, and before you know it, they start letting their political disagreements come between them. It's very sad, and if you think...
You can tell he's being silly because his appleheaded vagina mouth is in the "giggle" position.

Donald Trump Just Teasing, Won’t Commit Murder To Test Idiot Fans’ Loyalty

Donald J. Trump's jokes are too funny for average people to understand sometimes. This weekend, he said, "I could stand in the middle of 5th Avenue and shoot somebody and I wouldn’t lose any voters, OK? It’s, like, incredible."...
Love the smell of Republican infighting!

RNC Fires Racist Dirtbag Magazine For Being Mean To Racist Dirtbag Candidate

Oh how terrible, it seems that Donald Trump's existence continues to tear the Republican Party asunder, we are so deeply sorry about how hard we are LOLing. National Review, the racist collective of racist goons spawned from William F. Buckley,...
Ugh.

Mike Huckabee: Syrian Refugees Are Just Like That Time I Ate The Bad Squirrel Meat

Long before the Paris attacks happened, Mike Huckabee, presidential candidate and sometimes conjugal visit sex lover of Kim Davis (ALLEGEDLY!), had already won the blue ribbon for "most ignorant, stupid, hateful thing ever said about the Syrian refugees." Huck was...
Still up on that cross.

Kim Davis Is In Jail, And Wingnuts Are Jizz-Crapping Their Pull-Ups In RAGE!

CRU-CI-FY! CRU-CI-FY! CRU-CI-FY! Oh, we are just joshing, nobody wants Kim Davis crucified. (OR DO WE?) Wingnuts, though? Remember that time they lost their whole country in the span of a week, because gay marriage was legalized and the Confederate flag...
Oh, fine. Begin the recitation of stupidity.

Gays, Abortions, Blacks, Oh My! Your Virginia Shooting Tragedy Bingo

Wonder why bad things happen to good people? We've been scanning the dregs of the wingnuttosphere since Roanoke TV journalists Alison Parker and Adam Ward were shot to death while doing a routine interview Wednesday, and you'll be astonished...
Why is Obama so afraid of this man?

Ted Cruz Tells Obama And Clinton To Stop Rubbing Their Lithe Bodies All Over Islamic Tyrants

Ted Cruz has apparently had enough of all the Hitler rhetoric over the Iran nukes deal, and is now suggesting that Barack Obama, Hillary Clinton, and John Kerry want to have a hot swinger foursome with Iran and maybe...
She probably doesn't like crosseyed pegasi in the pool either.

Wingnuts Outraged Teen In Bikini Forced Hero Cop To Smack Her Around Some

The National Conversation On The Pool Party Gone Awry in McKinney, Texas, took a familiar turn after the first full day of media exposure. Yr Wonkette was astonished to see that on Sunday, even the nine full-time staffers of...
He has ALL the confuse

Gov. Scott Walker: Ultrasounds Are So Hella Cool They Should Be MANDATORY

Wisconsin Gov. Scott Walker does not understand why you libtards do not like the nice anti-abortion bill he signed in 2013. Recently, a federal judge smacked part of it down, saying that requiring abortion doctors to have admitting privileges at a...
History's Greatest Monster, 2016 Edition

‘Clinton Cash’ Author Worries Clinton Mafia Will Murder Him, Like How They Always Do

Peter Schweizer, whose book-shaped object Clinton Cash has apparently set some kind of record for Most Debunkings Before Actual Publication, is doing his darndest to keep hyping the thing, which finally slouches into bookstores today. On Monday's edition of...
Something must be done about all this nondiscriminating!

Wonkette Fires Gay For Freedom, Make Us GoFundMe Now

Yr Wonkette was pretty impressed by the story of Memories Pizza, the brave little Christian-owned pizzeria in Walkerton, Indiana, which announced it would definitely not cater any gay weddings, no way, not ever. It was a pretty brave stance, considering...
Same, Beaker. Same.

Wingnuts Thrilled With Iran Nuclear Deal, Have Nothing But Kind Words For Obama

On Thursday, the Prophet Obama (peace be upon him) won a great victory over the infidels. Or at least a framework for the final agreement of a great victory of the infidels. And the infidels were not pleased! Of course...
Dana Loesch, America's greatest living satirist

Dana Loesch Has Very Clever, Satirical Humor Thoughts About Dumb Ay-rabs

Move over, Mark Twain, because there's a new master of English-language political satire, and it is bespectacled she-troll Dana Loesch! It has been a while since Loesch graced us with her signature brand of satire. Thankfully, she is here...
Same as it ever was.

Here’s Everything That Killed Eric Garner (Other Than A Cop)

For a bunch of people who forever criticize liberals for “never letting a crisis go to waste,” conservatives sure are trying hard to tie their onerous taxes hobbyhorse (among other things) to Eric Garner’s death. Sen. Rand Paul was the most...
2014 America in one photo

Will Fox News Accuse Ferguson Of Doing War On Christmas?

Just a quick question for Todd Starnes and Bill O'Reilly: Would this photo be better or worse if the sign said "Merry Christmas"? Our guess: If Fox News does mention this sign, one of the resident Professionally Oppressed Christians will...
An armed society of intelligent cats is a polite society of intelligent cats.

Clip & Save! Your Handy Wonkette Review Of (Part Of) Dana Loesch’s New ‘Book’

We were planning to review for your enjoyment Amazon’s free preview of Dana Loesch’s new book-like substance, Hands Off My Gun, because who doesn’t want to spend a nice afternoon slogging through a piece of writing that is one...