Tag Archives: culture war

  The Browns Will Defeat The Rainbow!

Erick Erickson: Fertile Latinos Will Breed Permanent GOP Majority, Strong Like Bull

Just lie back and think of gerrymandering
Oh, sure, you liberals may be feeling pretty chuffed with how well 2015 has been going for you, what with your Obamacare surviving and your Supreme Court Victory for Sodom, and your beloved Barry Bamz just having a fine time being a highly mobile duck who isn’t the least bit lame, but the real joke is on YOU, according to Teabagging never-nude Erick Erickson. You see, he knows that conservatives have a secret weapon in their quiver, and that is the fact that the Latins will out-breed you birth-controlling liberals and you queerfolk what can’t make babbies at all. Welcome to extinction, you with all your abortions! Read more on Erick Erickson: Fertile Latinos Will Breed Permanent GOP Majority, Strong Like Bull…
  You'd Think Hate And Rage Would Bring People Together More

First And Second Amendments In Battle To Death As A**holes Shoot Up Texan Anti-Islam Event

She seems nice
A bunch of anti-Muslim extremists in Texas were attacked by a couple of Muslim extremists yesterday, proving that America needs to take much more extreme measures to protect itself from Muslim extremists. In the Dallas suburb of Garland, Texas, the charming folks of the “American Freedom Defense Initiative,” Pam Geller’s happy band of Islamophobes, were holding a widely publicized contest to find the bestest possible cartoon of the prophet Mohammed — a $10,000 prize to the cartoon that best captured what Islamophobes think is funny — when two men drove up and shot an unarmed security guard in the ankle; Garland police officers returned fire, killing the attackers immediately. Read more on First And Second Amendments In Battle To Death As A**holes Shoot Up Texan Anti-Islam Event…
  Also Something About Ponies Because It's Saturday

Ted Cruz Loves ‘The Simpsons.’ It’s Not Mutual.

None of these people would vote or Cruz. (Vader's endorsed Santorum)
So it seems that Sen. Ted Cruz (R-Moose Jaw) fancies himself something of a Simpsons fan, as he told The Federalist’s Ben Domenech in a recent podcast. He even did lines from his two favorite episodes, proving that he can relate not only to country music aficionados, but to rabid animation fans, also too! Read more on Ted Cruz Loves ‘The Simpsons.’ It’s Not Mutual….
  Firing Blanks In The Culture War

America-Hating Libs Murder Veterans Day Because They Fear Guns. Or Not.

Why not just let the kids know what WW I was really about?
Thank heavens we’ve got a good Culture War overlay for your Veterans/Armistice/Remembrance Day, America. According to a number of rightwing websites, the gun-hating (and hence Freedom-hating) liberals in charge of the Eau Claire, Wisconsin, School District have completely cancelled Veterans Day programs, denying children of a chance to learn about what makes their country great. Read more on America-Hating Libs Murder Veterans Day Because They Fear Guns. Or Not….
  Another Beneficiary Of Wingnut Welfare

Allen West To Head Up ‘Think’ Tank. Stop Laughing, You Guys, It’s Not Funny.

Finally a place for his talents
Congratulations to disgraced torturer ex-Rep. Allen West on finding a jerb! (We were going to say “honest work,” but this is Allen West we’re talking about, after all.) According to a big ol’ press release, come Jan. 2, 2015, the former disgraced colonel and former one-term congressman will become CEO of the “National Center for Policy Analysis,” a Dallas-based think tank that shills for the oil and insurance industries and thinks that global warming is a big conspiracy. And yes, it probably gets money from Koch Industries, too. Read more on Allen West To Head Up ‘Think’ Tank. Stop Laughing, You Guys, It’s Not Funny….
  chile con pistola en mano

Chipotle Unfair To Gun-Humpers! Boycott Chipotle!

Oh, golly, folks, looks like another gun-grabbing freedom-hating libertysquisher corporation is trying to Take Away Our Right To Self Protection! After a group of those cheerful souls from Open Carry Tarrant County — the same charmers that scared the living bejesus out of some Jack In the Box workers a while back — made a big show of taking their semiautomatic rifles to lunch at a Dallas Chipotle on Saturday, the company issued a statement Monday asking customers to please leave their guns at home. Needless to say, #BoycottChipotle is now a thing. Read more on Chipotle Unfair To Gun-Humpers! Boycott Chipotle!…
  clipbait

Stephen Colbert Warns Of Lesbian Throuple Threat To Traditional Marriage (Video)

From Massachusetts, Stephen Colbert brings ominous news of the latest rather hot threat to the institution of marriage: three women who call themselves a “throuple” and have sparked another rightwing freakout about how legalizing same-sex marriage will ultimately kill traditional marriage dead. Or as Colbert notes, at the very least, it will ruin “traditional threesomes, which are a wedge that drives straight couples apart after what was supposed to be a fun birthday present inevitably leads to crying whenever someone hears the name Stacey.” Read more on Stephen Colbert Warns Of Lesbian Throuple Threat To Traditional Marriage (Video)…
  clipbait

Jon Stewart Seems To Think The NRA Is Paranoid For Some Reason (video)

Tuesday’s Daily Show had some fun with last weekend’s NRA convention, leading off, as one must, with the WTF heard round the world, Sarah Palin’s weird joke about how waterboarding is how she’d baptize terrorists. And then he reminded us that this person was once the vice presidential candidate of one of America’s national political parties. (And don’t think we missed your borrowing of the Wonkette catchphrase “She seems nice,” Mister Jon Stewart. Fine. Now we’ll just have to put up with people saying we stole that…) Read more on Jon Stewart Seems To Think The NRA Is Paranoid For Some Reason (video)…
  'tough bananas!' is our new catchphrase

Radio Preacher Kevin Swanson: Did I Say Gay? I Meant Disney’s ‘Frozen’ Will Make Your Kid A Witch. A Gay Witch

So a couple weeks back we looked at how Colorado radio preacher Kevin Swanson had figured out that Disney’s Frozen is turning kids gay, because it just does, OK? Well, apparently Rev. Swanson simply can’t Let It Go, Let It Go, because now he’s identified another danger that Frozen and other movies pose to kids: these demonic kid flicks are leading children to practice witchcraft, which is a totally real thing, and are also part of Hollywood’s sinister agenda to turn children away from God, as opposed to simply making buttloads of money. Read more on Radio Preacher Kevin Swanson: Did I Say Gay? I Meant Disney’s ‘Frozen’ Will Make Your Kid A Witch. A Gay Witch…
  zuzu's petals--of subversion!

History Shocker! Ayn Rand Helped FBI Find Communist Influence In ‘It’s A Wonderful Life’

Before War On Christmas 2013 fades into memory, let’s take a look at how the FBI examined a Christmas Classic for evidence of communist propaganda. According to a nifty article in Aphelis, Frank Capra’s tale of the redemptive power of sentimental glurge was listed as potentially subversive, as part of a widespread investigation into alleged communist influence in Hollywood — as if anyone needed to investigate such an obvious fact, haw haw! Read more on History Shocker! Ayn Rand Helped FBI Find Communist Influence In ‘It’s A Wonderful Life’…
  bipartisan-curious

Rand Paul Wars On Christmas With Festivus Grievance Tweets

As if it weren’t bad enough that the right has turned “Merry Christmas” into a shibboleth, now they’re trying to co-opt Festivus.* Senator Rand Paul (R-Galt’s Gulch) announced yesterday that he would be tweeting his very own “airing of grievances” for fun and publicity, and so of course we are compelled to indulge him. Strangely, the nine fulltime employees of Twitchy found this something worth promoting, rather than part of the War On Christmas. There are rules on this, and if Rand Paul wants to have fun with a show about liberal New York Jews who mock the values of Real America, it’s funny, by god. Read more on Rand Paul Wars On Christmas With Festivus Grievance Tweets…
  sue the gay away

At Tea Party Unity Event, Anti-Gay Loons Dream Of Class Action Lawsuit Against Homosexuality

In the sort of thinking that seems perfectly rational in a world where we have declared war on “terror,” Tea Party Unity chairman Rick Scarborough and anti-gay obsessionist Peter LaBarbera shared their dreams of Suing the Gay Away yesterday. After all, back in the Clinton years, liberal attorneys general won a lawsuit against Big Tobacco, didn’t they? Read more on At Tea Party Unity Event, Anti-Gay Loons Dream Of Class Action Lawsuit Against Homosexuality…
  so long and thanks for all the nothing

Breaking! Exclusive! Must Credit Snipy! Shocking Story About Snipy’s Departure!

Well, this is awkward. I know the Glorious Editrix just announced a big Boston party for our new sideboob tracker blog and told you all I’d be the boss of it except that I will not be the boss of it because the Editrix is always the boss. Well, thrilled as I am for the opportunity to get paid to watch Miley Cyrus open the gaping maw of hell, I just can’t pass up the chance to go work for Ghost Andrew Breitbart’s new culture war juggernaut, BigDawg Music Mafia. I’ll be sad to leave Wonkette, of course, but who would blame me? Jumping ship to Breitbart-land offers me the chance to view literally everything in history as an affront to my cultural sensibilities. EVERYTHING! Read more on Breaking! Exclusive! Must Credit Snipy! Shocking Story About Snipy’s Departure!…
  no pot to piss in

D.C. Proposes Welfare Reefer For Poor Jazz Criminals

Yeah, this one’s not going to cause any rightwing freakouts: A proposal in the District of Columbia would require that marijuana dispensaries set aside 2% of profits to assist low-income people with medical marijuana purchases. Tell us about it, Washington Times: Under the regulatory proposal, dispensaries would give at least a 20 percent discount on marijuana to low-income people at or below 200 percent of the federal poverty level. Clinics often offer lower prices to poor patients, and states that allow medical marijuana often encourage discounts for low-income patients. But Allen St. Pierre, executive director of the National Organization for the Reform of Marijuana Laws, said no state has inserted this type of provision into regulations. “This rule is totally unprecedented in the medical marijuana community,” he said. Can’t imagine that this is going to end up being one of those D.C. home-rule things that Congress feels obliged to step in and crush, no, not at all. Read more on D.C. Proposes Welfare Reefer For Poor Jazz Criminals…
  there's no gesture like an empty gesture

Hero Republican Legislator Will Protect Son From California’s Transgender Restroom Tyranny

California Assemblyman Tim Donnelly is taking a brave stand for cisgender heteronormativity (trigger warning!), and he doesn’t care who knows it. To protest the state’s new law that allows trans students to use the restroom or locker room that they choose, the Republican legislator will be pulling his 13-year-old son out of public school. And in a guest column for WND (where else?), Donnelly raises the specter of “Allowing teenage boys and girls in the same locker room, showering side by side,” apparently unaware that schools don’t allow time for kids to shower during P.E. anymore. Disaster averted! Read more on Hero Republican Legislator Will Protect Son From California’s Transgender Restroom Tyranny…
  The Purple Prose of Texas

Wingnuts Furious: Texas Kids Design Imaginary Flags For Nonexistent Pretend Socialist Nation

Pity the poor children of Texas. Not only do they have to live in a state full of Texans, but many of them are at high risk of growing up to be Texans, too. Oh, and on top of that, they are constantly being bombarded by communist propaganda in their Texan-run schools, because apparently only communists get Texas teaching credentials. Thankfully, Texas Patriots have access to the Interwebs, and so they can expose the government schools for what they are: indoctrination factories brainwashing innocent children with the UN’s communist, pro-Muslim Agenda 21, with its FEMA Camps and bicycle paths. The latest dispatch from the culture war is a doozy, because it involves 6th graders being ordered — at Barack Obama’s behest, of course — to “design flags for a new socialist nation.” Clearly, this exercise in which children must think of a flag other than Old Glory can only be sinister. After all, this is the very same online curriculum that was previously investigated for signs of Muslim Bias! (And, OK, was found to actually be biased toward Christianity.) Read more on Wingnuts Furious: Texas Kids Design Imaginary Flags For Nonexistent Pretend Socialist Nation…