Tag: creationism

Gotta catch 'em all, two by two

Glenn Beck Yelling At Bill Nye About Noah’s Ark, Because Science

Glenn Beck briefly surfaced from complete obscurity to try to bair Bill Nye the Science Guy into an argument about Noah's Ark. It was sad.
Exactly how evolution works

Ohio School ‘Science’ Video Made By Weirdo Islamic Sex-Fiend Creationist. Wonkette Torn.

Schools in Youngstown, Ohio, are teaching 'Intelligent design,' using videos from a nutty Islamic creationist. Maybe Islamophobia and anti-science stupidity will cancel each other out.
Your tax dollars at work

North Carolina Vouchers Throw Taxpayer Money At Jesus Schools, Like Founders Wanted

a href="http://wonkette.com/497377/heres-a-surprise-school-vouchers-help-spread-creationism"Time for another update on the wonderful world of "School Choice" -- taking taxpayer dollars from public schools and giving them to private schools, to help improve education all around. Or at least help people running religious...
The crazy candidate lady Mary Lou is on the left, next to Ted Cruz's insane father.

Texas School Board Candidate Can’t Wait To Teach Kids About Obama’s Gay Whoring Days

Time for a dispatch from Texas, where the book larnin' happens. The Texas Freedom Network, which does the yeoman's work of trying to keep actual education in Texas schools, would like to introduce us to Mary Lou Bruner of Mineola,...
Bible lizard.

Bryan Fischer Knows Dinosaurs Are Really Just Ginormous Grandma Bible Lizards

Whatcha doin', Bryan Fischer? Solving science and convincing Wonkette that we have been completely wrong about this whole fundamentalist Christian thing, and just in time for the birth of Our Lord And Savior Baby Jesus, and also the afterbirth?...
HISTORY FACT.

Dumb Millennials Don’t Even Believe Jesus Rode Dinosaurs

Millennials, they are THE WORST. They're always like "Mommy, can you write a note to my teacher in medical school to say he's being mean?" and "Hey Taylor Swift, why is this gross old lady Alanis Morissette on stage...
The real holocausters, we guess.

The Snake Oil Bulletin: Sesame Street Holocausting Your Children!

Greetings, pilgrims! Saddle on up to the caravan here, and let your old pal Dr. Volpe spin you the tale of a joker-faced jackal-beast who decided to pick a fight with puppets. As you'll soon see, dear reader, up...
it's a baby not a robot doll

Ex-Con Jim Bakker Says Planned Parenthood Sacrifices Babies For Satan, So That’s New

We have no idea how Jim Bakker returned to cable -- maybe he never went away -- but it is certainly a blessing from the Comedy Gods, because nobody does insane bullshit preacherman crazy like Bakker when his voice...
A lot, actually

Ben Carson Pretty Darn Angry At Satan For Inventing Evolution

You may have noticed by now that, for a neurosurgeon, Ben Carson is a surprisingly unscientific guy. He was first-rate at cutting into brains and making repairs, but once you get him outside the operating theater, he comes off...
she's as enthusiastic as ever!

Idiot Homeschool Mom Reviews Creation Museum, Likes How It Bibles Up Science

We're sad to report that her very modest YouTube success may have spoiled Megan Fox -- not the pouty, please-rescue-me gal from the Transformers movies, but the loopy Christianist homeschool mom whose bizarre "audit" of Chicago's Field Museum became...
Very few of these going on in Jeb's head.

The Snake Oil Bulletin: Deepak Chopra Has Derp Thoughts About Evolution

Greetings, grifters! It's time again for the Snake Oil Bulletin, your weekly installment of the latest and greatest in quantum woo woo and pseudoscience. This week we have a return guest! Our favorite Oprah-approved king of quackery. No, not...
"learning" is fun!

Dumb Duggar Girl And Dumb Husband Explain Atheists Don’t Exist (Kind Of Like God)

There is something in Texas called the Institute for Creation Research, and one of the reality-TV-for-Christ girl Duggars took a field trip to it, with her husband. This is the same Duggar who field tripped to the Holocaust Memorial...

Louisiana Senator Is Not Cool With Scientists Murdering All The Creationists Dead

It's spring, so it's time for the Louisiana state legislature's annual competition for who can come up with the stupidest rationale to keep the awful "Louisiana Science Education Act" (LSEA), an anti-evolution law that's been in place since 2008....
'Maybe God made a monkey that doesn't like to think it's a monkey, and lies a lot.' -- Joe Rogan

Alabama Rep. Saves Schoolkids From Learning They Are Disgusting Monkeys

This is exciting! Alabama state Rep. Mack "Not a Porn Name" Butler has introduced a bill that will encourage students to "think critically" about science by allowing teachers greater latitude to add stuff to science classes that isn't so...

Oh Good, Gov. Bobby Jindal ‘Wrote’ A History ‘Book’

Louisiana, as you may have heard, isn't a state that's all that big on forcing education into people. Its public schools are being dismantled through aggressive "school choice" vouchers that use precious taxpayer dollars to fund religious schools, including...
Marco Rubio may very well believe this is happening right now, in the sky.

Surprise! Marco Rubio’s Church Is Full Of Demon-Wrasslers, Gay-Haters And Creationist Derp

Marco Rubio has two churches in Miami. One, as you might imagine, is the Catholic kind, because the Cuban-American Rubio is Catholic. The other one is a ginormous Baptist affair, featuring demon-wrasslin', homo-hatin,' and a sincerely held religious belief...