Wonkette

* Don’t fret, we wouldn’t let an idle summer week pass without a shallow poll. Thus, we proudly present: The Hill Intern Hotties competition. Since everyone already knows how this works, we’ll just let you speed along - boys’ poll here and girls’ poll here. In case you’re one of those “readers,” we’ve also got written testimonials for all the pretty girls and all the strong men. MORE »

As we’ve previously stated, we don’t put much stock in the rumors of an affair between President Bush and Condoleezza Rice — an affair that supposedly led a furious Laura Bush to decamp from the White House for the Mayflower Hotel. We have our doubts, largely because of the Condi part. C’mon, guys — Condi???

Right now, the Bushes are traveling in Europe. George and Laura Bush have made several public appearances together, and nothing seems amiss. In a question-and-answer session in Vienna, Laura revealed that George brings her coffee in bed each morning. This doesn’t seem like the behavior of a cheater.

Nevertheless, the Dubya-Condi rumors persist — and now they’ve been picked up by the tabloids. After the jump, for those of you who don’t share our skepticism, we recount — but don’t vouch for — the latest Bush-Condi gossip.

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* In defiance of the best interests of both the Democratic party and summer weekend motorists, Jack Murtha chooses Friday afternoon to declare his intention to run for majority leader, with the notion that Democrats will actually win some midterm elections and retake the House. “Jacky Drama” and “First Degree Murtha” expected to be to most popular nicknames. MORE »

Secretary of State Condoleezza Rice, assuming the position. (AP Photo/Gerald Herbert, via Princess Sparkle Pony)

We’ve been trying to take the high road around here. Over the past few days, we’ve refrained from writing about rumors of an alleged affair between Dubya and Condi, which supposedly caused Laura Bush to move out of the White House. We’ll willing to believe almost anything around here — but this gossip strikes us as a tad ridiculous.

As in the case of the Martin Random rumors, however, a flood of reader emails has forced our hand. We will now blog about the aforementioned crazy talk, just to stem the tide of tips about it.

Check out the dirt, after the jump.

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* The week started off with a double shot of intelligence stories to get us all hot and bothered. Did we say hot? We meant super-hot. MORE »

* CIA Director Porter Goss called it quits this week, and didn’t make up a reason for leaving. Not even the standard “time with my family” excuse, which of course makes us think it had something to do with the hookers or the gambling and payola. Anyway, he’s back on the gulf shore already, and everyone is waiting to hear who the next shady character to take over the job is going to be. MORE »

Looks like Adele Fergusen has some competition for “craziest columnist at a non-major newspaper.” From Fort Wayne, Indiana — the same metropolitan area that spawned the insane Tony Zirkle — we get this insightful commentary:

No, this is not an Onion article — although with an author photo like that, your confusion is understandable. This was published in an actual newspaper (page A4 of the hard copy edition). So, unlike our ephemeral musings, TREES DIED FOR THIS.

After the jump, some additional excerpts from Richard Sloan’s piece, plus commentary.

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* Ah springtime: sun, life, and the dawn of a beautiful crazy/homeless friendship. [Eavesdrop DC]
* Just one more reason stumble to the kitchen and pour yourself a cup of ambition. Then cry in it as you consider your pitiful lot. [Tales From the Club]
* A French state-sponsored search engine? You’ll probably get better answers out of your magic 8-ball. [Beauty and the Beltway]

No, this is not a metaphorical reference to Sen. George Allen: MORE »

We get a lot of reader email around here, and we try our best to read each message (and to respond when necessary). Given the sheer volume of correspondence we receive, there were many candidates to choose from; but this message must win for “best email we’ve received in a long, long time.” MORE »