December 13, 2013
Cory Booker, welcome to the Senate. On a day better known for scary costumes, you are one good-looking piece of eye-candy that we are very excited to see more of! And you were sworn in by the only man in the Senate we would like to bone more harder, Old Handsome Joe Biden, playing his [...]
There’s a very simple explanation for why Steve Lonegan lost last week’s special election for U.S. Senate to Cory Booker: The government shutdown. OK, that, and Lonegan’s being a loathsome asshat, maybe. But mostly the government shutdown, Lonegan told the Star-Ledger in an interview published Monday: “There is no doubt in my mind or in [...]
Here’s your Nice Time video for the day: Newark Mayor and Senator-Elect Cory Booker officiating at the city’s first same-sex weddings, marrying nine couples just after midnight, when New Jersey joined the rest of the 21st century. Did everything go seamlessly? Of course not: some asshat protester decided to Make A Statement, and was crushed [...]
Tucker Carlson’s Daily Caller, everyone’s favorite home for racists who can’t read good and stuff, has quite the little scoopty scoop, and that is that Cory Booker, who is a better human being than you, is NOT a better human being than you, because of how he is LYING about living in Newark, according to [...]
We know some of you beloved Terrible Ones have a huge raging throbbing hate-on for Newark mayor and New Jersey’s next senator, Cory Booker. You are all like waaaaah, banks! We get it. (Actually, we don’t really get it. But we guess the 27-year-old us who voted for Nader kind of gets it? Nope, still [...]
An aide to New Jersey Republican senatorial candidate Steve Lonegan got himself fired yesterday following a bizarre, obscenity-filled rant against Democratic candidate Cory Booker. When are political types going to realize that bizarre, obscenity-filled rants are serious business, and should best be left to professionals like Yr Wonkette? In the interview with Talking Points Memo’s [...]
Yes, we know, boobs. And Cory Booker. It’s very exciting. Especially the boobs. But really especially the Cory Booker, what a piece! Buzzfeed (NSFW link, because boobs) was first with the magical tale of how a man named Cory Booker used his Twitter to say he loved a stripper named Lynsie Lee. Go to Buzzfeed [...]
OMG you guys, did you hear that Cory Booker might be gay? Well, actually, what he said was that he wasn’t necessarily ruling out the possibility that he may or may not be gay, or straight, or something! In an interview with the Washington Post, Booker said that since he has not yet acquired a [...]
Newark Mayor Cory Booker, the caped-crusading, embattled-cat recovering, amateur fireman, Mr Plow come to life, twitter-master and media darling, won the Democratic primary for New Jersey’s open Senate seat yesterday despite a big ol’ Hate-On from liberal writers everywhere, including our own erstwhile wonkets. But why all the hate, haters?
As flags across New Jersey fly at half-staff in remembrance of beloved teevee man James Gandolfini, dozens of Garden State politicians are scrambling to explain their connections to an illegal pay-t0-play scheme that wouldn’t have felt out of place in one of the more boring episodes of The Sopranos. Here’s how it worked: the bankrupt [...]
Sure, everybody is all up in your grill today with fresh new news like the fact that the NSA is in your bedroom watching you RIGHT NOW or something, but here at Wonkette we also provide the valuable service of discussing completely obvious news because…well, because we really need to keep feeding you people new [...]
Gov. Christie has returned from the wilderness where he was in communion with The Great Smog God of Turnpike Exit 7-A, and has made his official declaration about how to fill Sen. Lautenberg’s recently vacated Senate seat.
Over the weekend, we told you about a New York Times hit piece on Tall Column of Chocolate Love Cory Booker, and how reporter Kate Zernike did not seem to be doing herself any favors by ending it with a steaming dump of DO YOU KNOW WHO I AM? Now, thanks to HuffPo, we are [...]
We guess Newark Mayor Cory Booker sighed too much in his presidential debate with Texas governor Jorge Boosh, because the New York Times has decided he is a big giant asshole! Meow, says the Times’ Kate Zernike, Cory Booker spends a quarter of his time out of town (getting $100 million grants for his city [...]
America, have you enjoyed your Cory Booker? He has been your American superhero, your bright shining full-of-integrity star in the awful firmament of American politics. He saves ladies from burning buildings. He has a Gosling-style tumblr dedicated to him. He scored free Hot Pockets for America, or at least for Newark. He’s just like you, [...]