Tag: Corruption

Wonkagenda: September 28th, 2016

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Neither a gentleman nor a scholar

New York Times Pretty Sure Trump Bribery Stories Not True Unless New York Times Breaks Them

The New York Times has found a nonsmoking gun that proves not much about whether Donald Trump paid Florida A.G. Pam Bondi to drop an investigation of Trump 'University'
It's like the Shining

Corruption Scandal Rocks Obama Cabinet, And You Won’t Believe What Hillary Said About It

Smooth Latin lover Julián Castro, the secretary of Housing and Urban Development and potential Hillary Clinton running mate, is in BIG TROUBLE for allegedly violating the rules against partisan campaigning by federal officials. Castro praised Clinton and criticized Donald Trump...

Donald Trump Did Not Say That Thing About American Soldiers That He Said

Donald Trump may have accused American soldiers of stealing 'millions and millions' of dollars in Iraq reconstruction money. Or he may have accused Iraqi soldiers of doing that. Or he may be a floor wax and a dessert topping.

Why Did Ben Carson’s Enemies Force Him To Shill For Quack Cancer Cure?

Now that Dr. Ben Carson is the Republican Party's new daddy of the month, his enemies are out to get him. How? By hopping in their submarine time machines, apparently, and forcing him to use his reputation as a...
Art swiped shamelessly from the incomparable Bill Griffith. OK, with some shame.

Head Foot-The-Ball Guy Resigns In Huge FIFA Scandal We All Care About Very Much

Wow, have you been following the incredibly fascinating FIFA scandal as closely as we have? As sports-related fuck-tussles go, it's like the Chicago Black Sox times DeflateGate plus BENGHAZI! It's all about corruption and bribery in the governing body...
Gee. Who could have told someone to fake the records?

Tulsa Sheriff’s Office Faked Certification For Cosplaying Cop Who Accidentally Killed A Man, Oops

It was bad enough that the Tulsa County Sheriff's Office apparently makes a habit of handing a badge and a gun to any rich schmuck who buys the department some flak vests and a few Crown Vics. Which is...
You're looking especially Muppetlike today, Senator

NJ Sen. Robert Menendez Indicted; Sorry, Daily Caller, No Fake Underaged Hookers This Time

Sen. Robert Menendez (D-New Jersey) has been indicted on corruption charges by the Justice Department in a bribery scandal that Yr Wonkette would never even cover if the guy had been a Democrat. He's accused of receiving campaign contributions...

The Weekend Stock Photo Report Resigned From Congress Before It Was Cool

In this installment of The Weekend Stock Photo Report with Weekend S. Photo, Aaron Schock will no longer be in Congress but is yes longer be in trouble with the Feds, Barack Obama thinks everyone should be required to...

Surprise! City Of Ferguson Run By A Bunch Of Grifty Criminal Racists!

Every time we read another nugget of information dug out of the Justice Department’s report on the gangster cartel that has run the town of Ferguson, it becomes more apparent that the town’s entire municipal court and police force...
Nope, can't take the Ferrari to prison with you.

Grifty Virginia Governor’s Wife Sentenced To Sleeping On Very Low Thread Counts In Prison

Ice Queen and former Virginia First Lady Maureen McDonnell brought single-digit temperatures with her to Richmond this morning for her sentencing hearing in the case of tobacco pills, unrequited love, and rides in a Ferrari that gripped the nation...
Have you seen the little piggies in their starched white shirts?

Mean Enviros Won’t Let Tenn. State Rep. Throw Pig Carcasses All Over The Place, Except They Did

Let's just call this story "Son Of Exploding Foamy Pig Doots," shall we? Except there's no exploding, and the foaming is mostly just a froth of pure pigshit coming from Tennessee state Rep. Andy Holt, who is quite certain...
He still looks nice on Facebook, though

Resigning Oregon Gov. Kitzhaber Gonna Go To So Much Jail Maybe (Because He’s A Democrat)

Oregon Gov. John Kitzhaber may be resigning effective Wednesday, unless he changes his mind again, but he and his fiancée, Cylvia Hayes, still have a big ol' pile of legal problems. Both the state and now a federal grand jury...
They just want to buy the White House is all

Koch Brothers Pledge $889 Million To Least Losery 2016 Candidate, If Any

If President Obama's lame-duck "don't give a fuck" attitude has been improving your outlook on life lately, then fresh from Freedom Partners' annual winter summit comes some news that will send you crashing right back down to Frown Town....
grift is a very big thought indeed

Ben Carson Shilled Scam AIDS And Cancer Cures For 10 Years, Will Be Your Next President Obvs

Just how much clownery do you need to completely obliterate the good will you built up from starting a foundation to do brain surgery for poor kids? How much pure nonsense does a trailblazing brain surgeon need to peddle...
Nope, can't take the Ferrari to prison with you.

Sad Former VA Gov. Bob McDonnell Will Be Your Pen-Pal, From Prison

  Former Virginia Gov. Bob McDonnell has been sentenced to two years in the Crossbar Hotel on multiple corruption charges. Federal Judge James Spencer said that the case "breaks his heart" but added that a "price must be paid" for...