convention

Well well well NRA, it looks like maybe you do not love the prologue to the Second Amendment (the “First” Amendment, whatever that might be) that much after all! That is because you shockingly asked Zombie Industries to remove its Zombie “Rockie” target from view at your big shindig over the weekend, the one we [...]

Remember when we told you about how the DNC delegates did that voice vote about putting God and Jerusalem in the platform, and the mayor of Los Angeles just made up the results, and then it kind of looked like the Democrats were booing God? Don’t worry, somebody noticed. Though the stupid fake voice vote [...]

After last night’s stirring RNC tribute to small business people who did not receive any help from the government except for government loans and grants and a taxpayer-funded stage to pimp their businesses, it is difficult to be more inspired than we already are. But here is a positive, hopeful story that will put a [...]

PDA  11:40 am July 17, 2012

Obama Macks On Black Chick

by Rebecca Schoenkopf

OMG send the children from the room, you are about to see (or have just seen? Little quick with the clicky finger there, huh bub?) PORNOGRAPHY. Leave it to a black man to be totally unable to control his lust, for all the world to see! Look there, at this Socialist Usurper busy ravaging some [...]

Oh, this is perfect. After spending all week straining to convince voters that he is a humble, all-American God-fearing Christian regular Joe, Barack Obama will deliver his acceptance speech tomorrow night from a structure that ABC News says “resembles an ancient Greek temple.” Because nothing hits the trifecta of Hollywood, presumption, and alternate religion like [...]

SEXYTIME  6:55 pm August 21, 2008

by Ken Layne

MILE-HIGH HAPPY ENDINGS: “Whether You’re Looking for a Stiff Drink or a Swedish Massage, the Mile High City Has Plenty of Ways To Recharge During the Democratic National Convention.” [Associated Content]

Maybe it’s because the bars won’t be open 24-7 slinging delicious Wonkettinis to help conventioneers drink away the pain. Maybe it’s because the start of the convention coincides with the beginning of the school year, significantly reducing the chances that 14-year-old pages will be available for games of “hide the memo” in the Minneapolis airport [...]

SHOCKERS  1:58 pm August 4, 2008

Bill Kristol Has A Scoop!

by Jim Newell

HA, Bill Kristol‘s column is like seriously not bad today. Hooray! This is because he writes about actual political strategy and not about how Obama is Hitler at the War Dildo. And he has a scoop, from his friends who work for McCain. Oh neat a scoop.

Here’s the first page of a real letter from some sad panda named Marvin D. Wells, one of 28 pledged Hillary Clinton delegates from Washington State who will still cast his vote for her at the national convention in August. He still hopes that Hillary can pull off a coup at the convention, you see, [...]

Hey now, what ever happened to Clinton’s former chief strategist Mark “Bowser” Penn, the most stereotypically evil man in the world? When he was demoted from his top position, no one expected him to have any less sway, yet he’s remained shielded from the public eye. Now, however, some new information has come to light [...]

GOP  2:01 pm September 27, 2006

A Twintacular GOP Convention!!!

by Ken Layne


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