congress
Who wants to hear about boring old “debt ceiling” issues such as old people being pushed into landfills because of no more money? What America needs is a Way To Laugh Again, and it got that bouquet of clown farts Sunday night as Madame Ex-Speaker Nancy Pelosi called for an official inquisition against Oregon’s best-loved [...]
Ron Paul, currently on his third run for president, is finally “in it to win” this time: he announced he will not seek re-election to his Congressional seat so he can focus on his presidential run. This has led to a massive outpouring of grief from sobbing Paultards, who all want to know WHO NOW POSSIBLY [...]
Anthony Weiner is crazy for girls and crazy for Twitter, two things that do not go well together, especially when you’re a married congressman who can’t stop taking pictures of your dick and sending them to the entire Internet. So, after who knows how many weeks of Weinergate, Anthony Weiner is resigning from Congress. We’re [...]
Here is a good use legislators have found for taxpayer money: more congressional travel, millions and millions of dollars of it! It’s not like we weren’t just hearing about how maybe some of those disaster victims in Missouri needed it, or anything. Free vacations for members of Congress and their families are the one thing [...]
Have you heard the hot news about Anthony Weiner and the never-ending dick joke that is now the entire life of this once-promising congressman — or should we say dongressman? — and how he will go to “rehab” to stop loving the young womens on Twitter? Yes, the liberal pinup Democrat who loved to go [...]
Have you heard about the website that combines the two worst things, Congress and Twitter? It is called “TweetCongress.org,” which is dumb, and this website found that congressional use of Twitter has declined 28% in the terrible week since Weinergate started, because Congress is full of olds who now worry that the Twitter is going [...]
Big-spending Washington elitist insider John Boehner has totally squandered his time as speaker of the House by failing to stop all government spending, so the teabaggers have launched a campaign to throw him out of Congress. “Replacing Nancy Pelosi with John Boehner isn’t much of an improvement,” says Tea Party Nation in a communique delivered [...]
The number of Americans relying on federal help to get food has been climbing for years now, with 45 million people and 21 million households currently dependent on the program. It’s not just the unemployed relying on the vouchers — seniors, veterans, school children and the disabled are among the groups hit hardest in this [...]
We thought Giant Whining Baby/Serial Divorcer Newt Gingrich had his half-million-dollar Tiffany’s credit line just because he always needs new engagement rings when he divorces his old, cancer-ridden wives for new, younger ladies he’s been schtupping for several years. But no, it’s actually sleazier than all that, because this is Newt Gingrich we’re talking about. [...]
Gosh, it’s almost like actions sometimes have consequences: After their plan to privatize Medicare helped a Democrat win a vacant New York congressional seat, House Republicans are vowing to prevent the 2012 election from becoming a referendum on the proposal. Democrat Kathy Hochul scored an upset in a traditionally Republican western New York district May [...]
This should play well in Missouri next year: House majority leader Eric Cantor (R-Meanie) has blocked federal disaster-relief help for Joplin, where an incredible storm and tornado killed at least 122 people and leveled much of the town. Police and firefighters and ambulance workers are still pulling victims from the rubble, and the Republican House [...]
Great news for the Democrats: They are once again winning congressional seats in weird rural areas full of old men in overalls plucking banjos from the comfort of sofas placed on sagging wooden porches. Even better news for the Women’s Movement: The Democrat who just won a rural upstate New York State congressional seat is [...]
Is Rep. Gabrielle Giffords about to be recalled for not showing up for work, because she was shot and nearly killed when she did show up to work, on a weekend in Tucson? No, she probably won’t be recalled. Only 165 people have signed the online petition so far, and even a few of them [...]
Oooo, is this Gay Day? Is it always like this around here? Well look: Firstly, we do not really want to be in the “outing the gay people” business. But that does happen in Washington with the Republican senators and congressman every few months, so it seems we’re on that beat for the time being. [...]






