Oh no! Condi's stuck on repeat! Or maybe shuffle! She went places, she met people... but it all seems so familiar, like she's just coasting for the next eight months or something. I don't know about you, but there are some Condi reruns I'd much rather see, so let's use the magical, revelatory power of Photoshop to pump up the Condiweek that was... after the jump, natch!
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It was a pretty bad Condiweek! She went all the way to the Middle East and accomplished little more than photo-ops with the morbidly obese; she bickered with kindly old man Jimmy Carter; and then she came home and participated in one of the most gruesomely cynical Bush Administration publicity stunts EVER. Catch up with America's Princess Diplomat after the jump!
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Kind of a weird week in Condiland! She had to threaten her staff again, had an awkward moment with Madeleine Albright, and endured the embarrassment of standing idly by as the Pope got kissed by — ew! — Nancy Pelosi. And that was really kind of it! So let's flesh things out the way real journalists do: by making things up! See the pictures and feel the magic, after the jump!
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Veteran Condiwatchers thought the ridiculous vice presidential rumors were over and done with, but oh no, there was to be one final, glorious flare-up last week to finally burn them to cinders. What else has America's Princess Diplomat been up to for the last seven days? Well, it all involves paperweights, cutesy baseball references, Jimmy Carter, and torture! Yay! Find out all about it after the jump.
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Last week was fun for Condi fans, but not so much fun for Condoleezza herself. She got dragged around by Bush on his farewell lap around NATO, and she had some laffs with George, but mostly was kind of a fifth wheel. Back home, the rest of us got to enjoy hot new Condicising photos and we finally learned who's playing Madame Secretary in Oliver Stone's Bush movie. Find out who the lucky actress is after the jump!
America's Princess Diplobot had a busy end of March: She celebrated 4,000 troop deaths in Iraq, reminisced about slavery, and reignited vice presidential rumors all by herself, by doing nothing more than talking to a friendly bear. Way to go, girl! Catch up with Condi after the jump!
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A long time ago in the 1990s there was this teevee program called The X-Files — a creepy mix of Nixon-era political conspiracy, the occult, fake terror attacks, FEMA killing everybody, and Space Demons. It seemed completely fantastic until 2001, when Dick Cheney and George W. Bush began their reign of horror. And finally, after years of silence, the creators of the X-Files are talking about how this administration stole all their ideas, even 9/11!
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Having to beg from Congress with those awful red-handed Code Pink hausfraus mocking you isn't a very nice way to start your week, but Condi Rice got rewarded with a two-day fiesta in Brazil! Yay! Join the Condi Carnival, after the jump!
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A Condoleezza road show is so much fun! Our Condi bounced from Egypt to Ramallah to Tel Aviv to Brussels, enjoying several perfect photo-ops along the way. The only problem was that outside the photo-ops, it was one of the most incriminating Condiweeks EVER, brimming with embarrassments, snubs, that Gaza Strip thing, and OMG, Glenn Kessler! So mean! Let's all pile on with Glenn after the jump!
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Each week, veteran Condiwatcher Peter Huestis (also known as Princess Sparkle Pony) provides a summary of the searing wit and infinite wisdom of America's Favorite Princess Diplomat™!
Each week, veteran Condiwatcher Peter Huestis (also known as Princess Sparkle Pony) provides a summary of the searing wit and infinite wisdom of America’s Favorite Princess Diplomat™!
On Monday, I directed you to an ultra-glamorous velvet painting of the secretary of state as an example of the wonderful world of Condi-inspired art. Since I was in a Condicentric mood (as usual), I never thought to see what else this gifted painter had to offer. Well, let me tell you, the Condi painting on black velvet was only the tip of a fabulous iceberg! Join me after the jump to marvel over Velvet Rove, Velvet Cheney, Velvet Ashcroft and… Velvet Lynndie England? Are these the most superfantastic portraits of our time? Probably!
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Each week, veteran Condiwatcher Peter Huestis (also known as Princess Sparkle Pony) provides a summary of the searing wit and infinite wisdom of America’s Favorite Princess Diplomat™!
Each week, veteran Condiwatcher Peter Huestis (also known as Princess Sparkle Pony) provides a summary of the searing wit and infinite wisdom of America’s Favorite Princess Diplomat™!
Each week, veteran Condiwatcher Peter Huestis (also known as Princess Sparkle Pony) provides a summary of the searing wit and infinite wisdom of America’s Favorite Princess Diplomat™!
Each week, veteran Condiwatcher Peter Huestis (also known as Princess Sparkle Pony) provides a summary of the searing wit and infinite wisdom of America’s Favorite Princess Diplomat™!
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