Insanely old oil monster George H.W. Bush has “pulled a Notre Dame” and invited the terrible President to come speak at Texas A&M University on Friday about the importance of Community Service, gay. George H.W. Bush is allowed to do this because (a) his Presidential Library is on the A&M campus and (b) he owns Texas. But could this be a catastrophe, now that it is controversial for presidents to talk to people in America? “Poppy” understands, though, that a few hundred racists will probably get drunk and protest for “states’ rights” or whatever, and has written an open letter to the students of A&M subtly begging them not to be complete and total assholes. MORE »

Dumb dumb dumb, dumb dumb dumb, dumb, dumb, dumb, dumb dumb dumb dumb dumb, dumb dumb dumb dumb. That is one “dumb” for each paragraph of Jonah Goldberg’s Los Angeles Times column today. For the record, we did not expect it to be “good,” in the traditional sense — we didn’t expect to read it at all! But 18 paragraphs of unmitigated “dumb” has a strangely magnetic appeal during this lazy news season. So let’s check out Jonah’s column, in which he argues that Obama’s plan to offer educational aid as a reward for national service is somehow both (a) welfare and (b) slavery. Europe, MTV, “the JFK cult,” and Rolling Stone magazine also play bit parts in Jonah’s remarkable paean to the God of Shit. MORE »