Tag Archives: comments

  behave yourself! behave yourself!

Deleted Comment Of The Day: ‘You’ People Take A ‘Dump’ On ‘Real’ Americans!

Hey, Wonkaroos! We know you’re all just watching the Big Gummint Shutdown clock — when it reaches midnight, don’t forget to kiss a couple billion dollars goodbye — but in case you’re in the mood for a distraction (and god knows we are), here’s one of those comments that Yr Wonkette does not allow. Enjoy it with some of those cakes we like. Our unhappy camper writes in response to our story last week on the Big Yell At Barack Obama To Submit to The People For Arrest Party, scheduled for November 19. We made fun of the notion that deranged sorta-lawyer Larry Klayman could get a million morons to march on the White House, which led an irate patriot to leave the following comment, in which he neatly skewers the utter hypocrisy of all liberals and especially Wonkette’s Gary Legum, with whom Irate Patriot is very Irate: You mean like the Democrats do “All” the time Gary Legum? You mean like the Marches “You” people have where you wear your “Terrorist Scarves” around your faces to hide your “Identity” while you and others like you, “Trash” Private Stores by “Smashing the windows and “Stealing” their “Merchandise” and then there is my favorite “Turning Police Cars over and setting them on “Fire” after taking a “Dump” on them. Is this what you speak of “GARY”!!!! Irate Patriot saw a YouTube video of the 1999 WTO protests in Seattle once, and it has never, “ever” left him. Read more on Deleted Comment Of The Day: ‘You’ People Take A ‘Dump’ On ‘Real’ Americans!…
  creature features

Cosmic Fireballs, Water On Mars, And Why House Republicans Are Like Stoned Kids, All In This Week’s Sci-Blog

Hey there, Wonketeers! It’s time once again for another appalling Wonkette Sci-Blog. Fire one up and come on in. Sometimes it’s just not a good idea to let the Stoned Kid drive. Many years ago a group of us were driving around wearing various aspects of an Illegal Smile (as was the fashion of the time). The Stoned Kid who had been driving pulled up to the red stoplight at an intersection fairly competently and waited. So far, so good. Then, the left turn lane arrow switched to green. Stoned Kid sees the green arrow and floors the big American sedan straight through the intersection, grinning and blissfully ignorant of the enraged panel van driver he cut off. “Uh, Jesus! You just blew through a red light, Stoned Kid!” “What? No! The light was green!” “No, dammit! That was a turn lane! Your light was red!” “No! The light was green! GREEN MEANS GO!” “No, the arrow was green! Your light was red!” “Bite me! It was GREEN! GREEN MEANS GO!” Needless to say, Stoned Kid was forcibly replaced by a more able driver soon after and we all made it safely through that night. Sometimes you have to recognize who’s able to cope with reality and who isn’t. Read more on Cosmic Fireballs, Water On Mars, And Why House Republicans Are Like Stoned Kids, All In This Week’s Sci-Blog…
  you don't know what 'ad hominem' means

Deleted Comment Of The Day: ‘Your Face Is So Far Up Obama’s Ass…’

As you all know, Yr Wonkette does not allow comments, but if we did, we would certainly get a lot of interesting communications! For instance, we received this missive from “jsk” in response to Thursday’s story about the nonrevelations in the Benghazi hearings: What a poorly written article. How can anyone be taken seriously who obviously doesn’t even have the intelligence to pass 3rd-grade English. Either that or your face is shoved so far up Obama’s ass that you can’t see well enough to proof read your own work. And the reason your face is up his ass, is because he has once again been caught with his pants down. Anyone who thinks it’s okay for a U.S. president to abandon Americans under attack on American soil and then fabricate a preposterous story to save his own skin, is as disgusting an individual as Barack Obama himself. Impeachment is too good for him. He should be tried and executed by a military firing squad. We guess we have been put in OUR place! INPEACH! Then EXECUTE TO DEATH! Also, too, while we are not into that sort of thing at all, we would not be the least bit surprised if it turned out that Barack Obama’s ass tasted of mangoes and honey, with strong undertones of ass. Read more on Deleted Comment Of The Day: ‘Your Face Is So Far Up Obama’s Ass…’…
  visions of america

A Children’s Treasury of Sincere Comments Praising Wal-Mart

Last week we mentioned that a half-dozen heirs to the Wal-Mart fortune own more than the 100,000,000 Americans at the wrong end of the U.S. Pyramid of Poverty, which is gigantic on the bottom and narrow in the middle and just a teeny tiny point on the top that controls all the wealth in this irredeemably corrupt welfare-capitalism police state of desperate, insane “consumers.” We also noted that one of the heiresses to this outrageous stockpile of American wealth has been throwing around about a billion dollars to construct and fill up a vulgar Fine Art museum in Arkansas, in a ditch behind the Wal-Mart headquarters. Within a few days, we began finding lots and lots of pro-Wal-Mart comments from people who have never commented on Wonkette before. It’s a Festivus miracle! Read more on A Children’s Treasury of Sincere Comments Praising Wal-Mart…
  testing ... testing

Participatory Journamalism Experiment: Submit & Vote On Wonkette Stories!

Hello comrades. We have a mission for you, should you choose to click/accept it, etc. Wonkette Propaganda Industries & Co. is preparing a Digg-style story submission system to replace our current unwieldy and underutilized tips@wonkette mail list. What this means is simply that we would like to gauge interest in such a public forum where you would use your existing commenter accounts to submit stuff for Wonkette. And readers could vote the things up or down, a la Reddit/Digg, and your comments about whatever ridiculous/outrageous newslinks would add to the fun/horror. (Sensitive/anonymous tips will always be accepted and appreciated through the usual tips line.) Read more on Participatory Journamalism Experiment: Submit & Vote On Wonkette Stories!…
  win of the afternoon

Comment of the Day: ‘That’s Our Unicorn!’

In the Diminished Expectations Department, Obama’s Justice Department persecuting Obama-lovin’ leftists for having liberal ideals is one of those things that warrants a very reasonable response like, Eh I’m never voting again and also am going to BLOW UP AMERICA, even though such a response will also result in Obama’s Justice Department persecuting you. But our prize-winning Commenter of the Day notes that we just need to put all of this in perspective, and only then is it appropriate to weep openly and respond to all of Obama’s fund-raising spam with violent rhetoric, which will also lead to Obama’s Justice Department persecuting Obama’s supporters, again, forever. Read more on Comment of the Day: ‘That’s Our Unicorn!’…
 

Does Everybody Have Their New Wonkette Commenting Account?

Unlike the last time we had to switch commenting systems — when we got gay-divorced from Gawker Media, going on three years ago — this “move up” seems to have gone a hell of a lot better. How do we know? Because last time around, you were sending us angry/frustrated emails at the rate of about a hundred a day, and it took several months to painstakingly figure out why so many commenter accounts were “born funny.” Read more on Does Everybody Have Their New Wonkette Commenting Account?…
 

Last Notes On the New System, With Apologies For Comment Hardships

As Glenn Beck once said during the Martian Civil War, one-score and four hours ago, your Wonkette embarked upon its first redesign since 2007, and the first comment/technology system change since the spring of 2008, when Hillary Clinton was the Democratic frontrunner for president and Twitter was some weird new thing a few geeks were doing at the SXSW conference. We know “change is hard” and whatever, for you people, because you’re all romantic drunks, and we appreciate your patience while things get finalized and you figure out how this new comment system works. Read more on Last Notes On the New System, With Apologies For Comment Hardships…
  nadine is that you?

Hilarious Weirdo Leaves Comment About Sarah Palin’s House (?)

What kind of insanity is Sarah Palin causing today? We were reading Wonkette alum Juli Weiner’s thing at the Vanity Fair website about the Great Home-Depot Pre-Assembled Board-Wall of Wasilla when we stumbled upon a comment that may or may not have been translated from the original Latvian. Does Sarah Palin “takes off her cloths, shows her boobs, old lady, and then devalues real estate”? Read more on Hilarious Weirdo Leaves Comment About Sarah Palin’s House (?)…
  things we knew

George Washington Is A Terrible Coward

Any Commander of the Continental Army worth his salt should know that you can’t go about Warring if one side moderates all Blogspot comments, on the Internet, approving nothing. Each side must stand in a line and shoot at the other line — with Dignity — until enough people are dead. Read more on George Washington Is A Terrible Coward…
  populamism

THIS SINGLE COMMENT FROM SOME FREE REPUBLIC THREAD DESERVES ITS OWN POST: “reaganaut1,” upon hearing that Barack Obama wants to impose a small tax on banks to recoup bailout funds, warns: “If Wall Street doesn’t grow a pair of nads now, they are forever doomed.” Text “HAITI” to 90999 to help the powerless Wall Street. [Free Republic via No More Mister Nice Blog] Read more on …
  please stand by

NO WE DID NOT BAN YOU (YET): We don’t know what’s going on with the comments, either. But we have our comment boxes again, on our various machines, across this great land. HEADQUARTERS is maybe working on the “can’t comment at Wonkabout” problem? Okay here is a fun challenge: If you can comment, but couldn’t before, please explain what happened, in the comments, and then we’ll have TECH SUPPORT read these comments, the end? Read more on …
  caption contest

CAPTION CONTEST WINNER: Okay now DON’T take this personally, because most of our paid-for jokes suck too, but… well maybe the problem was with the picture? Not much to work with? (WHAT WE MEAN IS THAT THE ENTRIES WERE BAD.) So the winner will be working-class hero “jagorev” for ecstatically outing himself as a fan of this nerdy little nerd sport, whack-a-mole: “OMG, as a cricket fan myself, I feel like Barry just touched me in my special place (the guy with him, Brian Lara, is one of history’s greatest cricketers). This is what it must have felt like for basketball fans when he nailed that three pointer.” GET A JOB, JAGOREV. Read more on …
  where the last half hour has gone

Do You Hate Obama For Using Teleprompters, Too?

As some of you pointed out, the comments thread on that Fishbowl DC post we just linked to has some the best punditry we’ve seen the election. At least 75% of them make some scathing reference to the fact that Barack Obama uses teleprompters to deliver prepared speeches, like all Presidents and leaders and speakers have done since the invention of teleprompters and before that, when they read speeches from paper. There is literally no way that someone using a teleprompter to deliver a speech can be construed as controversial. Ha. But did you also know that pretty boy over there in the White House also wears “shoes” on his feet, like a retarded pussy? CAN’T HANDLE THE TERRAIN ON YOUR BARE FEET, HUSSEIN? [FishbowlDC] Read more on Do You Hate Obama For Using Teleprompters, Too?…
  real americans

Ha Ha, Best ‘Liberal’ Blog Somehow Between Wonkette And PUMA Site

So we checked out our “competitor,” the Confluence blog, and, as many of you have already discovered… it’s a PUMA site! They have a post called, “An Interview with Harriet Christian, NY Senate Seat Contender.” Oh man. Welcome to our radar, Confluence! [The Confluence] Read more on Ha Ha, Best ‘Liberal’ Blog Somehow Between Wonkette And PUMA Site…