commenters
There Are People In This World Who Simply Do Not Care For Michelle Obama
Internet commenters: they are the suck! (Present company … excepted? Hmmm.) You cannot read any story about any person whose name ends with ‘z’ (‘SPANICS) without getting an eyeful of the most insanely racist shit, the kind that makes your stomach sink into your liver, as if your liver was not having enough problems without [...]
Someone Should Step In Before White Supremacist Murderers Get Hurt
Two horrific mass shootings have rocked our world in the past few weeks. In Aurora, CO, an insane man walked into a theater and shot dozens of innocent people, leaving us with a hollow pit in our souls as we searched for an answer to the question of why an ABC news man was so [...]
‘Venomous, Obese, Gullible Imbeciles’ — Genius Describes Americans In One Perfect Paragraph
After today’s news about yet another reason for the whole world to despise Americans, Wonkette commenters discussed ways of avoiding death by angry mobs while traveling abroad. Ideas included dressing in the costume of a Canadian, and probably “weeping under the bed at a hotel.” But commenter GregComlish wins the afternoon with his comment: I [...]
FBI Raids Computers of Koch-Monster Scott Walker’s Henchwoman
Another of Wisconsin Governor Scott Walker’s propagandists on the public payroll had her home and computers raided by the FBI and state police, on Wednesday. The “former top aide,” Cynthia A. Archer, is currently on “paid sick leave” but had been the deputy chief of Walker’s comically corrupt administration. What did all the G-men want [...]
Wonkette ‘Deceived By Satan’ Re: His Fave Grandma, Sarah Palin
Remember the Ironic Tale of crazy gun/god fanatic Sarah Palin being threatened by a crazy gun/god fanatic? Guess who doesn’t like that kind of story? Crazy gun/god fanatics who are also Sarah Palin fanatics! Could this somehow result in a “Comment of the Day” feature on your Wonkette? Oh yes it can! “I hope the [...]
Does Everybody Have Their New Wonkette Commenting Account?
Unlike the last time we had to switch commenting systems — when we got gay-divorced from Gawker Media, going on three years ago — this “move up” seems to have gone a hell of a lot better. How do we know? Because last time around, you were sending us angry/frustrated emails at the rate of [...]
TOP SECRET COMMINIQUÉ TO WONKETTE COMMENTERS: When the raven dives for a dragonfly and the dog barks at midnight, the monikers and pass-codes of the past will perish like art without patronage. What? Yes, this is an encrypted message, found at a dead drop in a Northern Virginia suburban park.
American Web Commenters Very Upset About Arab-Speaking Nations Getting Terrorist Version of Internet
If you are an elitist internationalist with a nancy-boy education, the news that internet top-level domains will now be available in other alphabets was probably not a direct threat to your precious freedoms and sexuality. You probably didn’t even give a damn, right? Well, this is why you’re sitting around getting vegetarian-sushi recipes off your [...]
WIN OF THE AFTERNOON: Regarding the House special election in Florida that nobody talked about because it wasn’t a “game changer” because a Republican didn’t win, commenter JMP says: “I hadn’t even heard there was a special election going on today, unlike the hype over certain previous ones; why, it’s almost as if the media [...]
‘The Jesus Painting Yesterday’ Produces Obama Campaign-esque Artistic Revival
Well how about this! Jacksonville artist David Durrett sends this “real painting” (super-sized) to your Wonkette and writes, “I love Wonkette, and was inspired to do an acrylic response to the Jesus painting yesterday! Hope you like it!!” Yes it is very nice! Maybe Obama can steal this one too, for his house. Also, we’re [...]
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Please Nobody Tell The Yahoo! Commenters About Michelle Obama’s New Portrait
by Rebecca Schoenkopf
Do you know who Yahoo! commenters love? Hint: It is Michelle Obama! They love her very, very much, and when they call her “Moocow” and “Squatch” and “Sasquatch” and “Mooch” and “Silver-Backed Gorilla,” it is not because of racisms but is more like a … well, okay, maybe it is a LITTLE bit racist. Also, [...]