Do you know who Yahoo! commenters love? Hint: It is Michelle Obama! They love her very, very much, and when they call her “Moocow” and “Squatch” and “Sasquatch” and “Mooch” and “Silver-Backed Gorilla,” it is not because of racisms but is more like a … well, okay, maybe it is a LITTLE bit racist. Also, […]

Internet commenters: they are the suck! (Present company … excepted? Hmmm.) You cannot read any story about any person whose name ends with ‘z’ (‘SPANICS) without getting an eyeful of the most insanely racist shit, the kind that makes your stomach sink into your liver, as if your liver was not having enough problems without […]

Two horrific mass shootings have rocked our world in the past few weeks. In Aurora, CO, an insane man walked into a theater and shot dozens of innocent people, leaving us with a hollow pit in our souls as we searched for an answer to the question of why an ABC news man was so […]

It is time for the not-really-daily Daily Feature, Wonkette’s Win of the Afternoon. Today’s star comment notes that the Dow Jones Industrial Average has soared an astonishing 62% (sixty-two percent!) since the Kenyan Socialist Barack Obama seized the White House in a violent Saul Alinsky coup that left over 1 billion Americans tragically murdered. Jeez, […]

After today’s news about yet another reason for the whole world to despise Americans, Wonkette commenters discussed ways of avoiding death by angry mobs while traveling abroad. Ideas included dressing in the costume of a Canadian, and probably “weeping under the bed at a hotel.” But commenter GregComlish wins the afternoon with his comment: I […]

Another of Wisconsin Governor Scott Walker’s propagandists on the public payroll had her home and computers raided by the FBI and state police, on Wednesday. The “former top aide,” Cynthia A. Archer, is currently on “paid sick leave” but had been the deputy chief of Walker’s comically corrupt administration. What did all the G-men want […]

In the Diminished Expectations Department, Obama’s Justice Department persecuting Obama-lovin’ leftists for having liberal ideals is one of those things that warrants a very reasonable response like, Eh I’m never voting again and also am going to BLOW UP AMERICA, even though such a response will also result in Obama’s Justice Department persecuting you. But […]

Remember the Ironic Tale of crazy gun/god fanatic Sarah Palin being threatened by a crazy gun/god fanatic? Guess who doesn’t like that kind of story? Crazy gun/god fanatics who are also Sarah Palin fanatics! Could this somehow result in a “Comment of the Day” feature on your Wonkette? Oh yes it can! “I hope the […]

Unlike the last time we had to switch commenting systems — when we got gay-divorced from Gawker Media, going on three years ago — this “move up” seems to have gone a hell of a lot better. How do we know? Because last time around, you were sending us angry/frustrated emails at the rate of […]

EYES ONLY  11:24 am August 24, 2010

by Ken Layne

TOP SECRET COMMINIQUÉ TO WONKETTE COMMENTERS: When the raven dives for a dragonfly and the dog barks at midnight, the monikers and pass-codes of the past will perish like art without patronage. What? Yes, this is an encrypted message, found at a dead drop in a Northern Virginia suburban park.

Arizona Congressional candidate Ben Quayle had previously denied he was a contributor to a website called “Dirty Scottsdale” a few years back. But now he is admitting that he couldn’t even get a blogging job with this site, which he’s said was “satirical,” because he says he “just posted comments to try to drive some […]

If you are an elitist internationalist with a nancy-boy education, the news that internet top-level domains will now be available in other alphabets was probably not a direct threat to your precious freedoms and sexuality. You probably didn’t even give a damn, right? Well, this is why you’re sitting around getting vegetarian-sushi recipes off your […]

COMMENT OF THE DAY  1:40 pm April 14, 2010

by Ken Layne

WIN OF THE AFTERNOON: Regarding the House special election in Florida that nobody talked about because it wasn’t a “game changer” because a Republican didn’t win, commenter JMP says: “I hadn’t even heard there was a special election going on today, unlike the hype over certain previous ones; why, it’s almost as if the media […]

Well how about this! Jacksonville artist David Durrett sends this “real painting” (super-sized) to your Wonkette and writes, “I love Wonkette, and was inspired to do an acrylic response to the Jesus painting yesterday! Hope you like it!!” Yes it is very nice! Maybe Obama can steal this one too, for his house. Also, we’re […]

YES! Here is your Barack Obama giving the “most muslin speech ever” by wishing the terrorists “Ramadan Kareem” on “behalf of the American people, including Muslim communities in all 50 states.” (“Ramadan Kareem” means “Merry Starvation Christmas,” in Mexican.) Then he explains Muslim culture for a while. Fifty million white grandmothers in America are opening […]