JOHN McCAIN cut himself (”down the highway” not “across the street”) after NAVY lost to Ohio State, at American collegiate football. Hardly a surprise, considering those dapper Navy midshipmen can’t even beat a bunch of dirty beatnik bookworms at croquet. Can you even begin to imagine how disastrous it would be if MIT challenged Navy to a game of MARIO KART? … MORE »

New York Times opinion editor Andrew Rosenthal lost all professional credibility when he hired “lightning rod conservative” Bill Kristol late last year and then — and then! — called Liberals “intolerant” for not accepting this “serious, respected conservative intellectual” as a particularly edifying addition. Well, Kristol’s one-year contract is almost up, and we’re amazed that Andrew Rosenthal still has a job. Any job. So what’s the fixin’ plan for 2009, Rosenthal? His answer: hire, uh, rock stars such as that U2 guy who cares about AIDS, The Bono. MORE »

Intern Juli has compiled her notes and will now describe the atmosphere at Columbia University during last night’s Service Nation Forum with Barack Obama and Walnuts. If you watched the thing, you’ll understand how comical it is that so many people were duped into watching it outside. Here is Juli’s preview from yesterday. MORE »

We are only hours away from John McCain and Barack Obama’s 9/11 Forum at New York City’s Columbia University, and no one cares. But! Our own Intern Juli actually attends this bratty college and has written about the campus atmosphere leading into the event. Juli’s secret dispatch suggests that a bunch of spoiled snobs are whining about nothing. Who could have predicted?

As no one outside Columbia’s three block campus would ever know, today is a very exciting day in Morningside Heights. John McCain and Barack Obama are coming to the student center to talk about the importance of Service, and 9/11, which is today’s date. And the entire student body will watch the thing from a giant flatscreen teevee on the steps of an administration building, because Columbia hates its students. MORE »