The best song/video combination since “Thriller” appears on the Iowa Federation of College Republicans’ blog, home of Wonkette Vice Person of the Year 2007 nominee Ben “Beef Jerky and Toiletries” Johnson. Unlike Ben, however, the MittGirls are endorsing heterosexuality in their lovely performance of “Mitt’s our Man.” YOU DO NOT HAVE TO BE A BOY TO LIKE THIS. I know this, because I am a boy. [Iowa Federation of College Republicans]

The chairman of the Iowa Federation of College Republicans, Ben “Beef Jerky” Johnson, has apparently been keeping his eye on teh Internets’ colossal makefunnery of him. We’d like to lay claim to the lion’s share of this, and accordingly we’ll assume that much of his e-mail response to the College Republicans listserve!!! was directed at us. In said e-mail, he lies and says that he’s not “actually gay,” he just dresses the part. Beef jerky and generally gay writing also play pivotal gay roles, and you can see the whole gay thing after the jump. MORE »

Thanks to commenter jann9884 for digging up what was easily last night’s biggest debate submission: That of one Ben “Beef Jerky and Toiletries” Johnson, the chairman of the Iowa Federation of College Republicans. Johnson voices his concern to the candidates with that same smarmy charm that earned him Wonkette’s douchebag of the week title not long ago. Specifically, he queries, Why are you giving my drivers license to teh Messicans when I can’t even buy a good Cuban cigar? We’ll have to think about that one, Benji, but we’ll be sure to report back to you — because we’re never ignoring you again. [YouTube]

Jesus, there’s another video of Ben Johnson, the chairman of the Iowa Federation of College Republicans. In this one, he talks about his organization’s efforts to support the troops. And he totally says, at one point, “we send packages to their units.” MORE »

* Reliable Source: Grandpa Huxtable turned on the Norwegian Embassy’s Xmas Tree, ’cause dude loves Norway… Joan Collins goes to the Press Club, forgets name of own book. [WP]
* Yeas and Nays: Columbia College Republicans have new shirt that is kinda funny, kinda sad in light of midterm election results… Midterm losers have until Friday at noon to vacate their offices. After that, they get a cubicle with room for one member at a time… Smith Point owner to start new bar described as Smith Point for middle-aged people. [Examiner]
* Under the Dome: Did you hear? Jim Webb had some sort of altercation with George W. Bush… Pretend Rep. “Sherri Davis almost as amusing as real fake Rep. Shelley Sekula-Gibbs. [The Hill]

* Heard on the Hill The true story of how S.R. “Macaca” Sidarth ended up with the Webb campaign… Steny Hoyer is a great-grandfather. Jeez… Ken Mehlman jokingly threatened to ritually mutilate George Allen’s genitals in a bizarre religious ceremony. [Roll Call]
* Reliable Source: Which election winners will be good for gossip, which losers we’ll be sad to see leave, plus gratuitous mention of our stepmom. [WP]
* Yeas and Nays: Nancy Pelosi pretends to care about the House Dem’s “30-Something Working Group,” which is allowed to talk on the House floor only at night when all the grownups have gone home… Wm & Mary college Repubs list ways to get over election results. Number one: cry softly… After conceding the election, George Allen went on the radio to predict a victory for a Washington football club that was killed 27-3 by the Eagles… Only one of Y&N’s “hottest” candidates won. [Examiner]
* Rush and Molloy: Bush jokes play great in Qatar. [NYDN]

From a Princeton College Republican Email: MORE »

Right, it’s settled, we totally love Republicans. MORE »

“I love to engage in repartee with people who are stupider than I am,” Ann Coulter said onstage at the University of Connecticut. No, she wasn’t explaining why she appears on The O’Reilly Factor so much. Instead, she was mocking UConn students for making her job even easier than it usually is. The UConn Undergraduate Student Government paid the controversial pundit $16,000 to speak — and DC’s own Clare Boothe Luce Policy Institute kicked in untold thousands as well — but Coulter lasted only fifteen minutes before using chants of “You suck, you suck” as an excuse to cut her speech short and go straight to the Q & A section of the evening. MORE »

• Producer “bilks” investors in a “reality” television show about the DHS. That’s Karen Hughes’ job. [DHS]
• Killer dolphin alarmist also an expert on crop circles, the sinking of the Gaul. [Gelf]
• “Michael Brown, who recently resigned as the head of the FEMA, has been rehired by the agency as a consultant to evaluate it’s response following Hurricane Katrina.” No joke, too busy retching. [CBS]
• “When College Republicans invoke the Establishment, they mean a clique of former College Republicans.” Of course. [TNR]
• I am responsible for 13-year-olds having sex. (FWIW, I would never think of sex as something to “just get over with.” I barely remember it to begin with.) [Reasoned Audacity]

The New Republic’s Franklin Foer reports from this summer’s skullduggery-laden College Republican Convention, which elected a South Dakota kid named Paul Gourley, a self-professed “hick” as its new chair. The College Republicans are the great proving ground for made political operatives in the GOP–past presidents include Lee Atwater, Karl Rove, and Jack Abramoff. Foer says his favorite dirty trick involves a plainly forged fax that created a slate of dubiously legitimate Missouri delegates. But for our money, it’s hard to beat this one, courtesy of the aw-shucks “hick” Gourley: MORE »