Tag: college

Ivanka Trump’s Unpaid Interns Want To Tell Other Interns How To Live Fabulously Poor

Ivanka Trump keeps domestic slaves to make her website look fancy.

Hillary Clinton’s Tech Plan Will Make All Your Kids Nerds

We told Dom to ding Hillary's plan where necessary. He gave it a blowjob instead. INTERNS!

Christian College Officially No Longer Has To Deal With Gross Professor Who’s Nice To Muslims

Time for an Official Wonkette update on a story we brought you weeks back, about a political science professor from Illinois's Wheaton College, Larycia Hawkins, and her nasty proclivity for acting like Muslims are not only human beings, but also...
MC FLOTUS

Michelle Obama Doing Gangsta Rap Again

Oh, that Michelle Obama is at it again! She has been the scourge of wingnuts for years now, saying they should be healthy and drink water and eat vegetables instead of whatever cheesy fried butt lard they usually eat. And in...
Ew gay.

Tennessee College Gets To Boot Pregnant Homos, Keep Its Precious Taxpayer Moneys

Carson-Newman University, a little Southern Baptist school in Jefferson City, Tennessee, ain't 'bout ta cotton to none 'a them queers and their pregnant slut friends. And yay, the federal government says it doesn't have to, even though it receives...
GUNNNNNNNS!

Idiot Nevada Assemblywoman Michele Fiore Will Represent Boobs And Guns In Congress!

Of all the broken-braineded local politicking idiot teabagger ladies, Michele "That's One L" Fiore is our favorite. She's an assemblywoman in Nevada, and she came onto the scene just as Michele "The other one L" Bachmann was breaking our...

Rand Paul Wants You To Just Say No To Heroin, Book-Learnin’

Dr. Rand Paul has put a pin in his prissy plaints about his dressing room not being fancy-pants enough to dole out some real good advice to the kids these days: The main thing I would say is that nothing’s...
Sexytime Jesus Vacation

Uh Oh, Looks Like Dumb Duggar Kids Don’t Have Proper License To Win Souls For Jesus

Jill Duggar Dillard and her husband, Arranged Husband Dillard (his name is "Derick"), are supposedly missionaries in Central America. You remember -- we reported on how their Beliebers were all mad about how it sure LOOKS like they're using...
Lance Sanderson, with gay stripes all over him.

Catholic School Sends Gay Boy Home For A Week To Think About How Gay He’s Been

Remember that kid from Memphis, Gay Lance Something-Or-Other? If you don't, NO, he did not build a clock, that boy was a Muslim, not a gay! Lance Sanderson is a senior at a Catholic boys' school called Christian Brothers,...
It's people! Chris Christie EATS PEOPLE! (#2 in a series)

Chris Christie Locks Down Voters Who Love Student Loan Debt

Chris Christie knows how he'd win a presidential election between himself and Bernie Sanders, just in case that particular combination comes up: Let the free market fix everything, the way it always does. Ha! That'll teach Bernie Sanders, with...
Oh, we get it, it's about date rape-type stuff!

People Seem To Think Bud Light Slogan Is Rapey, Just Because It’s Really Rapey

Earth's most generic light beer, Bud Light, has been doing an ad campaign that they think is oh so hip, lately, to try to get beer-pong playing, dildo-brained college kids to upgrade from Natty Light and drink THEIR piss...
Who wants to take one for the team, ladies?

James O’Keefe Totally Pwns Catholic College For Loving ISIS And Terrorism. Obviously.

Whey-faced adult virgin James O’Keefe (or his publicist) has been spamming us to take a look at his latest video allegedly exposing another college campus for being a hotbed of ISIS-supporting terrorist love. That way, he can fundraise by...
Actual women's studies professor

Daily Caller OUTRAGED Feminist Professors Get Paid Like Actual Professors

Prepare to be shocked and appalled and disgusted, while you're at it, because you know who is really making out like bandits these days? No, not those Wall Street types who make six-figure bonuses on top of their six-figure...

Sexy Florida Church Must Pay Taxes On All-Night Naked Beach Parties, Unfair!

Imagine you are a center of Legitimate Jesus Worship during the day, and a center of NEKKID BEACH PARTIES at night, because this is part of your "ministry." You would be the Life Center: A Spiritual Community church, in...
Where could she even be hiding a gun?

Nevada Bill Will Solve Rape, Let All Co-Eds Shoot Everyone, What Could Go Wrong?

Ah, college. That heady brew of drinking, parties, hormones, Marxist indoctrination, drugs, late nights, not enough sleep, political correctness, overblown drama, and more hormones. You know what might spice it up even more? Allowing students to carry guns on...
When your elitist liberal friend says he wants to get a college education.

No One Cares About Candidates’ College Degrees, Wingnuts Upset Anyway Because It Is A Day

Sweet merciful Yahweh, are we really going to have to spend the next year and a half debating the merits of a college education for presidential candidates? Apparently we are, if the recent hooting over Rand Paul and Scott Walker...