• Dan Bartlett says the White House Iraq policy is much like history, “changing week to week.” [Media Matters]

• Bush to establish military junta if Democrats manage to win any seats. [Captain's Quarters]
• Political consultants on both sides scared shitless of their candidate being interviewed by Stephen Colbert, calling his show, “must-not-do TV.” [Potomac Flacks]
• Hillary Clinton opponent and also-ran John Spencer calls Hillary a “butter face.” Claims it cost “millions” in plastic surgery to fix her busted grill. [The Left Coaster]
• All along the watchtower, Mitt Romney kept the view. While all the Mormo-Republican strategists came and went, wacky Utah preachers too. [The Carpetbagger Report]
• Maintaining “EIB” all the way, Rush Limbaugh accuses Michael J. Fox of faking Parkinson’s disease to garner sympathy for Democratic causes. [Crooks & Liars]
• Paranoia inducing Total Information Awareness program, previously booted out of DARPA, lives on at NSA with the rest of the illegal programs you haven’t heard about. [TPM Muckraker]
• America has its priorities straight, spends more on candy corn at Halloween than the GDP of Nicaragua. [Thinkprogress]

• Heard on the Hill: Katherine Harris’ own car does not have a Harris for Senate bumper sticker. Possibly due to last month’s hilarious shoe-related car accident. [Roll Call]
• Under the Dome: House Majority Leader John Boehner needs a haircut. He is still quite tan. Senator Chuck Schumer pulled a hamstring. [The Hill]
• Reliable Source: D.C.’s congressional delegate Eleanor Holmes Norton insists she got the joke when she appeared on The Colbert Report. [WP]

Here’s Stephen Colbert’s take on yesterday’s Supreme Court decision in Hamdan v. Rumsfeld, striking down the military tribunals for Guantanamo Bay detainees as violative of U.S. and international law. MORE »

Love him or hate him, Chris Matthews is a force to be reckoned with. The Hardball host has “an almost transparent knowledge of your soul.” And he’s a really good wrestler — or at least better than Stephen Colbert: MORE »

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• Reliable Source: Matt Lauer hosts a dinner at Cafe Milano for Meredith Vieira… Sales of Ann Coulter’s new book are strong… Alberto Gonzales denies that his children download music illegally. [WP]

• Heard on the Hill: Rep. Lynn Westmoreland (R-GA) is boning up on the Ten Commandments, after being unable to name all of them on The Colbert Report… Rep. Howard Coble gets invited to the White House, takes a female staffer — picked through a lottery — as his guest. [Roll Call]
• Page Six: Celebs turn out to try and convince DNC executive director Tom McMahon that New York should be selected to host the Democratic national convention; Barbara Walters promises to take McMahon out and get him drunk. [NYP]

Rep. Lynn Westmoreland (R-GA) is one of only two House members not to sponsor a bill this session. But no matter that. MORE »

* President Ahmadinejad can send a mix tape with any songs he wants, all Bush hears in his head is the remix to that Outkast song — Bombs over Tehran. [Arms Control Wonk] MORE »

Now we bring you some news from beyond the Beltway. Arkansas Governor Mike Huckabee, the fitness fanatic and likely 2008 presidential candidate, is in a spat right now with the Arkansas Times. And things have gotten ugly.

An Arkansas correspondent informs us:

[P]ossible presidential candidate Mike Huckabee has decided to purge the Arkansas Times from all of the governor’s office notification lists. He defends his action by saying the alt weekly isn’t a “news organization.” This is most definitely in retaliation to the Times’ criticism of Huckabee and his wthics transgressions, the latest of which is his abuse of a state-funded airplane.

Huckabee is a petty, vindictive little man who gets upset when you call him on his challenged ethics and his penchant for giving clemency to prisoners who claim to love Jesus and then go out and kill (look up the story on Wayne Dumond).

The saga continues, after the jump.

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* Because what the New American Century really needs is some wife-beating nuke-dropping hard asses. Er, rather, more of them. [Crooks and Liars]
* Café Milano and a red carpet do not a celebrity make. Still, it’s good to see the Fox heads acting like a family, it even looks like Shep and Laurie Dhue have the same botox practitioner. [Fox News]
* When Duke Cunningham gets hookers, he only wants the best, and to be the best, ladies, you got to have these. The alarm feature is also good to distract the Federal agents who just busted into the room while you climb out the window. [Fleshbot]

In the words of our tipster: “I’m glad to see they’re getting to the bottom of this.” MORE »