Tag: cnbc

Don't worry, Macaulay Culkin didn't do anything wrong!

Trump Idiot Knows The Very Rich Are Different From You And Me. They Are LOL MORE HONEST

Rich people are good, poor people are bad, THE END.
He gets cranky if there's no pudding

Donald Trump Doesn’t Want Debate Moderators, Because They Might Ask Him Questions

He thinks it would be better if he and Hillary just argued about stuff. So presidential!
Don't try this at home.

How Donald Trump’s Sociopathic Parenting Made Donald Trump Jr. The Winner He Is Today

Donald Trump Jr explains where he got his lovable Patrick Bateman personality.
If price gouging is wrong, she don't wanna be right

Joe Manchin’s Daughter Made SO MUCH MONEY Quintupling Price Of EpiPens! Good Job, Her!

Pharmaceutical company CEO Heather Bresch just feels awful about having to make all this extra money from a lifesaving medication that she keeps raising prices on.

Lying Liar Carly Fiorina Lied Many Lies At The Debate, And That’s No Lie

That debate Tuesday night sure was somethin'! It was like, you know, Republicans, on a stage, and they were on the Fox Business Network, and there were questions and even commercial breaks with trailers for Michael Bay's Benghazi!!!!111!! film...
Republican debate watchers.

Let’s Watch Republicans Try To Out-Stupid Ben Carson. Your Debate Preview!

Oh, do you have your DVRs set and your babysitters called and your sex lube procured for tonight's SUPER-EXCITING REPUBLICAN DEBATE? Yes, they're going to yammer words at each other again, and people are going to watch it, and...
Never Forget

Rick Santorum Beated Up Whoopi Goldberg And ISIS, Will Be Toughest President

Rick Santorum, whose polling throughout the primary season hasn't risen higher than Rick Santorum's dick when he discovers sexts from his wife's hot abortion doctor ex-boyfriend, has sent out a fundraising email. No, we do not know how the Washington...
THROUGH WITH YOU FOOLS

Watch Your President Barry Bamz Obama Mock Whiny-Ass Republicans To Their Face

President Doesn't Give A Fuck is out there again, Not Giving A Fuck. He spoke Tuesday night at a DNC event, and what do you think was on his mind? Oh, just the Republicans and how they are hilariously...

Donald Trump Leads Republican Scabs Across Their Own Debate Picket Line

After a brief attempt to collectively bargain for kinder, gentler debate rules -- Republican presidential candidate workers of the world, unite! -- the whole scheme fell apart when Donald Trump uncordially invited the other candidates to suck his YOOGE gold-plated balls,...

Loser Republicans Want Debates To Be More Fair To Losers

This is so pathetic, even we feel sorry for the Republican Party. Yes, we, Yr Wonkette, always first in line to instruct Republicans on the various ways they should have sexual relations with themselves, often involving unhygienic tools. After boo-hooing about how last week's CNBC-hosted...
Liberal Icons Everywhere

Let’s Meet The Dirty Cabal Of ‘Liberals’ Who Control The ‘Liberal Media’

Did you guys watch CNBC's shitty GOP Debate? True to their "First In Business" tagline, those free market champs gouged America with pay access for the privilege of watching a gaggle of hacks complain about any question that wasn't,...
RNC Chair Reince Priebus

Republicans To Cancel NBC Debate Unless Candidates Get Reality Shows And BJs

It would appear that Republican National Committee Chair Reince Priebus has failed to read his Wonkette yet again. We sexplained Thursday that anybody who thinks the CNBC debate sucked because it was overtly biased against the candidates is A...

Why Republicans And CNBC Can F*ck Themselves Right In the Free Market

On Wednesday, Americans watched the third Republican presidential debate. Well, some Americans, anyway. The ones who could afford it. Because, in case you needed reminding, freedom isn't free. And neither was access to a debate among contenders to be the next leader of...
RNC Chair Reince Priebus

Dear RNC: Stop Bitching About Last Night’s Debate Questions. You Sound Like A Idiot.

Wednesday night's (very dumb) CNBC Republican debate had barely ended before the RNC and individual campaigns were whining and kvetching -- to reporters, their moms, to Pinterest, and everywhere else -- that the questions were SO MUCH UNFAIRNESS to the brilliant...