Tag Archives: clusterfuck

  Votageddon 2012 Update

Arizona Taking Even Longer To Count Votes Than Florida, Which May Get Unearned Sense Of Competence

Arizona appears to be ahead in the race to the bottom of the electoral-competence barrel, yay! Nearly a week after the election, hundreds of thousands of votes were still waiting to be tallied. To the surprise of absolutely no one, the mess appears to be at least in part a result of the state’s efforts to suppress minority voting enhance ballot security, resulting in a large number of provisional ballots that must be verified by hand. Early votes also make up a large portion of the uncounted ballots, which you would think is a little odd since they were, you know, early and stuff. Read more on Arizona Taking Even Longer To Count Votes Than Florida, Which May Get Unearned Sense Of Competence…
 

NATO Finally Agrees To Take Command of Libyan ‘Easy Part’

Hooray, the plan worked! Sort of … NATO will take “command” of the no-fly zone enforcement, but still refuses to have anything to do with the “dropping bombs” and “blowing shit up” part. So, America will continue the command of the blowing-shit-up part of the non-war. Read more on NATO Finally Agrees To Take Command of Libyan ‘Easy Part’…
 

“Don’t Worry, Girls, We’ll Protect You”

The Ministry of Interior in Iraq has ordered that all the policewomen in Iraq turn in their weapons for redistribution to men or face a withdrawal of their pay. Iraqi police officers, you’ll no doubt recall, are subject to intimidation, harassment, kidnapping and execution regardless of their gender. The women were recruited by the U.S. because of cultural mores that prohibit male officers from searching female suspects and to assist in increasing the reporting of violence against women. All officers are allowed to take their weapons home because of the danger in being a police officer in Iraq except, now, the female officers won’t be able to have any because they’re girls. But, obviously, the male officers will just protect them from violence, the way they already protect all the other women in the country so well. [LA Times] Read more on “Don’t Worry, Girls, We’ll Protect You”…
 

Trillion-Dollar Freedom On The March

Remember when that Iraq War was pretty much going to pay for itself — from the $20 billion in annual oil revenues! — and certainly wouldn’t cost the U.S. more than maybe $60 billion, but more likely about $10 billion? Paul Wolfowitz said this in congressional testimony so you know it must’ve been true. And top White House economics guy Lawrence Lindsey must’ve been totally wrong when he guesstimated a $100 billion to $200 billion price tag, because he was fired as soon as he mentioned that to the Wall Street Journal. Anyway, the White House just demanded another $190 billion on top of the $602 billion Congress has already spent on Iraq (and Afghanistan, whatever that is). We’re almost at $800 billion dollars, people! And you know what that means: Only $200 billion more to Victory! (By the way, U.S. gross domestic product in 2006 was $13 trillion.) Pentagon seeks $190 bln more for Iraq, Afghanistan [Reuters] Read more on Trillion-Dollar Freedom On The March…
 

Iraqi Insurgents Tragically Fail To Kill U.S. Lawmakers

Iraqi insurgents nearly killed three Republican senators and a Democrat from the House, for good measure, as the Americans attempted to flee Iraq on Thursday. GOP senators Richard Shelby, James Inhofe, Mel Martinez and Alabama Representative “Robert” E. “Bud” Cramer were finishing their vacation in Baghdad when missiles and rocket-propelled grenades were fired at their C-130 cargo plane. Read more on Iraqi Insurgents Tragically Fail To Kill U.S. Lawmakers…
 

Beloved Conservative U.S.-Loving French President Also Hates America

The election of Nicolas “Reagan” Sarkozy was a rare happy moment for American wingnuts who until that exact second had hated France with all of their tiny bitter might. Finally, a pro-American French president would restore America’s global glory and make the lazy communist book-reading French weirdos start putting on the pounds, watching more teevee and bombing all the Muslim countries! Read more on Beloved Conservative U.S.-Loving French President Also Hates America…