Tag: climate change

Which of these men would YOU rather hug?

Your Senate Sunday: Anybody But Oklahoma Sen. James Lankford (R – The Worst)

How do you solve a problem like Jim Lankford?
Always good advice for dealing with this guy

Donald Trump Thinks The Mafia Is Libeling That Nice, Safe, Healthy Asbestos. This Is A True Story.

You know what else isn't dangerous? Heroin. Try some today!
simpler times

At Least Your Boss Didn’t Make You Spend Your Unpaid Sunday With Mitt Romney

Some thought coal magnate Robert Murray of corporate behemoth Murray Energy broke the law when he made his people attend a 2012 Mitt Romney rally on a fucking Sunday in August when there was definitely nothing better these miners...
Haw haw, fuck you, Earth!

Donald Trump Knows Less About Energy Than Sarah Palin Does. Let That Sink In

Donald Trump just loves coal and oil, they're just tremendous and terrific. YOOOGE.
Could we borrow a little of that Ebola panic?

Republicans Love Unborn Babies So Much, They Will Give Them All Zika Virus To Spite Obama

Republicans, who freaked out mightily over Ebola a couple years ago, are taking a far more laid-back approach to funding preparations for the Zika virus. We can't imagine why.

Trump Building Walls In Ireland Too

Donald Trump acknowledges climate change isn't 'bullshit' or 'a hoax' when it's threatening his Irish golf course.
You have to admit it's a nice hat

Rightwing Senator Isakson Maybe Not Insane Enough For Georgia. Your Senate Sunday!

Our weekly tour of the 2016 Senate races visits Georgia, where a political novice is running a longshot campaign to unseat a two-term Republican incumbent. Needless to say, it's a bit messier than that.
oh dear

Poor Exxon Finds Congressional White Knight To Take On Government Bullies

Thank God this nice congressman will fight off the scientists pretending global warming 'exists.'

The 5 Best Times Obama Called Everybody A Dumbass In His Rutgers Commencement Speech

It's a pity he's too shy to say what he really thinks.
Now, about my disappearing ecosystem...

Big Oil Gives Up On Drilling In Arctic, Loses Billions. Sucks To Be You, Big Oil!

Some temporary good news for the planet: Oil Companies have decided there's no money in drilling in the Arctic Ocean. For now.

Antarctica Set To Drown Louisiana Dead By 2100, So There’s A Good Reason To Drink

Sad news about the global warming hoax, you guys. Turns out that the liberal scientists are so committed to their big lie that they're going to go down to Antarctica and melt all the ice, which will cause the...
How is this helping the war effort? IT ISN'T!

Barack Obama Records 15 Minutes Of Science Teevee. WHY ISN’T HE KILLING ISIS???

a href="http://wonkette.com/580555/girl-scouts-show-obama-science-projects-he-did-not-build"One of the nice things the White House does every year is its Science Fair, which is usually good for some nifty videos of Barack Obama playing with a marshmallow cannon or meeting adorable Super Girl Scouts who...
drill babies

Damn Rockefellers Now A Bunch Of Damn Wind-Power-Loving Dirty Hippies

If you love something set it free, if it comes back it's probably covered in oil The Rockefeller family made much of its considerable bones with Standard Oil, possibly the most iconic Corporate Person in American history. But just like...

World’s Sexiest North American Leaders Break Entire Internet, With Sexiness

Oh. My. God. Becky. Did you SEE how sexxxpot Canadian Prime Minister Justin Trudeau is visiting Barry Bamz Also The Sexpot Obama at the White House of U.S. America? Did you immediately faint as you witnessed what Canadian-American relations could...
The crazy candidate lady Mary Lou is on the left, next to Ted Cruz's insane father.

Texas School Board Candidate Can’t Wait To Teach Kids About Obama’s Gay Whoring Days

Time for a dispatch from Texas, where the book larnin' happens. The Texas Freedom Network, which does the yeoman's work of trying to keep actual education in Texas schools, would like to introduce us to Mary Lou Bruner of Mineola,...
all woman, no kidneys

Rejoice! New Barbie Body Types Will Enhance Self-Esteem Of Mattel Shareholders

This week we'll talk about dolls, soda and lying because deep down, like most of us, our Corporate Persons are runny-nosed little kids. Barbie's new curves not as hot as some of the takes they're producing Barbie! She's...