Oh god, thank you to this commenter for directing us to a mole’s account of Peggy Noonan’s class at Harvard. These Noonanisms speak to the heart and soul of a nation: “I wasn’t sure I could wear mascara every day. One should dress. One should wear mascara when one can.” One should. It is Proper. But hey HARVARD MOLES? HELLO? Don’t send this stuff to Gawker. Be a friend to your Wonkette: tips@wonkette.com. We have more “iPhones” to give out to our best operatives. [Gawker]

Overworked, Ann Taylor-wearing women of DC (and especially Hill Women): it’s time to learn a thing or two about sex appeal. Hip-hop dance teacher and choreographer Shira Goldberg will be teaching the dance moves from Beyonce’s music video “All the Single Ladies: (Put A Ring on It)” in a workshop this Sunday at First Class, Inc. on 20th St. NW. MORE »

If you’re not a poor like 78 percent of Wonkette readers, then you might be interested in taking Chef Danielle Turner’s new food styling classes. For $100, you can learn how to arrange and garnish your food in such a way that will turn your PB&J or Lean Cuisines or whatever into works of art. MORE »