Tag Archives: class war

  thanks obama!

President Obama To Give Everyone Free Money Just For Working Real Hard

Manhater
President Robin Hood has yet another evil scheme to redistribute the wealth, taking money from poor oppressed employers to give to their greedy fat cat workers, by redefining the traditional definition of “overtime work.” From the White House basement, the dirty blogger in chief explained: Read more on President Obama To Give Everyone Free Money Just For Working Real Hard…
  Conservation is for little people

Rich A-Holes Guzzling California’s Last Drops Of Water Because ‘We’re Not All Equal’

freedom is deader than this lawn
You may have heard that California is all out of water. Again. This is a thing that happens frequently — not because of abortion, or pagans, or Obama’s policies on Israel — but because the state is mostly a desert and does not make enough water to support California’s addiction to perfectly manicured lawns, swimming pools, and hydrated sidewalks. Gov. Jerry Brown has told Californians to stop wasting all the water, because seriously, people, there is no more left. But rich fucks, being rich fucks, don’t give a fuck. The state is not the boss of them, and they’ll waste all the water they want, because they are better than the rest of us: Read more on Rich A-Holes Guzzling California’s Last Drops Of Water Because ‘We’re Not All Equal’…
  Here have some news n stuff

Is It Time For Class War? (Hint: Yes)

But watch out for the gout
Still on the fence about whether it’s time for all-out up-against-the-wall eat-the-rich class war revolution? No you’re not: In 2014, Wall Street’s bonus pool was roughly double the combined earnings of all Americans working full-time jobs at minimum wage. […] Read more on Is It Time For Class War? (Hint: Yes)…
  a feature not a bug

If Kansas Jumped Off A Bridge, Would Other States Do It Too? Apparently Yes!

That bridge sucked anyway.
You may be familiar with the state of Kansas, where Governor Sam Brownback and the ruling GOP have conducted what Brownback has called a “great experiment” in conservative economics. They’ve radically slashed income taxes, especially for top earners, on the theory that liberating this money will supercharge the economy; businesses will flock in, new jobs will be created, and an orgy of private sector commerce will fill the budget hole caused by the tax cuts. Read more on If Kansas Jumped Off A Bridge, Would Other States Do It Too? Apparently Yes!…
  Would You Like Breadsticks With Your Class War?

Guess Who Is A Big Wage Stealing Robber Jerk? It Is Right-Wing Capitalist Hero Papa John!

No extra compensation for the shitty pizza
Here’s some Nice Time/Justice Done news for all you fans of class warfare: A Papa John’s pizza franchise in New York has been ordered to pay almost $800,000 in back pay to workers it cheated out of wages. The court found that for more than six years, the franchisee “Emstar Pizza Inc,” which operates seven restaurants, rounded each employee’s hours down to the nearest full hour, cheating hundreds of employees out of their full pay, as well as underreporting hours worked and not paying overtime. Let’s hear it for the job creators, who deserve a tax cut for all the hard work they put into earning profits, huh? You don’t just come up with scams like that by being lazy. The owner of the franchise, Emmanuel Onuaguluchi tried unsuccessfully to escape previous court orders on back pay by attempting to sell the franchise. Read more on Guess Who Is A Big Wage Stealing Robber Jerk? It Is Right-Wing Capitalist Hero Papa John!…
  declare the pennies on your eyes

Don’t Like Getting Boned By State Taxes? Just Be Filthy Rich!

Anti-Fox comments reposted on my Tumbrel account
Here’s something every class warrior on the barricades should know: There isn’t a single state in the entire United States where a poor or middle income person can be assured of paying a lower percent of their income in state and local taxes than a wealthy person. That’s right, comrade! According to a comprehensive study by the Institute on Taxation and Economic Policy, literally every state in the country has a regressive tax system, thanks to heavy reliance on sales and excise taxes and insufficiently progressive income taxes (or in many cases, no income taxes at all): Read more on Don’t Like Getting Boned By State Taxes? Just Be Filthy Rich!…
  clipbait

Stephen Colbert Has Had It With All This Non-Musical Class Warfare

Stephen Colbert weighs in on the oppression of the rich, who have it pretty rough these days, with all those resentful non-rich who keep threatening to redistribute tiny percentages of their wealth, just like Hitler did. Or maybe the French Revolution, though Colbert notes that our peasants don’t even put on any uplifting musicals. Class warfare always goes down a lot easier with a Broadway anthem. Read more on Stephen Colbert Has Had It With All This Non-Musical Class Warfare…
  never-surrender monkeys

Snotty French Tire Factory Workers Take Bosses Hostage, Demand All The Brie

Hey, Fox News! You know what class warfare is? Class warfare is not someone pointing out that CEO pay has increased enormously while middle-class wages have stagnated or fallen in real terms. Class warfare is maybe something a little more like this: Workers at a French tyre factory threatened with closure have taken two company executives hostage and promised to hold them until given “enormous amounts of money”. The two managers were scheduled to meet with union representatives Monday at the Goodyear factory in north Amiens, but instead about 200 workers showed up and blocked the door of the conference room with a huge tractor tire. It’s still not lopping off heads, but yes, definitely closer to class war, we would say, n’est-ce pas? Also, Yr Wonkette fully endorses the use of big honkin’ tractor tires as tools of class struggle. Read more on Snotty French Tire Factory Workers Take Bosses Hostage, Demand All The Brie…
  eat the rich

Class War Has A Fresh New Face: Chelsea Clinton And Her $10.5 Million NYC Pad

We have spent some time during this journey through our worldly vale of tears defending the gargantuan mansions of both Albert Gore and Husband of the Millennium John Edwards. You know, stuff like, “Hey, John Edwards made those kajillions helping people get justice and also eat shit Tucker Carlson just on principle” and “Al Gore can do whatever the fuck he wants for the rest of his blessed life, because we owe him one for voting for Nader.” But Chelsea Clinton, although a lovely young woman, has yet to impress us with anything she has brought to this world. She is arguably less good at her “job” than JC Penneys Boys Department Catalogue Model Luke Russert, if also less visibly pleased with herself about her complete lack of charisma and talent. Therefore, we are not inclined to apologize for her coming purchase of a $10.5 million, 5,000-square-foot NYC pad overlooking Madison Square Park. Five and a half bathrooms, for a childless couple in their 30s, is fucking unseemly, Chelsea and whoever your husband is. Readers, let us get our knives and forks at the ready, for the ritual Eating of the Rich, after the jump! Read more on Class War Has A Fresh New Face: Chelsea Clinton And Her $10.5 Million NYC Pad…
  gentle murmurs

Fox Nation: Queen Michelle Obama Bogarting All The Powder

How is Queen Marie Antoinette Moochelle Nobumer class warring the poor people of Aspen today? She is class warring them by being too rich, that is how! Because the poor people of Aspen could not land their private jets because Michelle’s fat ass was in the way! Read more on Fox Nation: Queen Michelle Obama Bogarting All The Powder…
  eat the rich

What Else Should Be On New York Restaurant’s $2000 Plate Of Pasta?

Rupert Murdoch’s New York Post brings us news of the beginning of the French Revolution the War of Poor Aggression. A high-end Midtown restaurant is serving up the city’s priciest plate of pasta — a $2,000 dish of homemade tagliolini complete with fresh lobster and black truffles and served on a gold-leaf platter designed by late fashion icon Gianni Versace. Bice Restaurant, at 7 E. 54th St., is charging an arm and a leg of lamb for the dish, part of a four-course meal and wine to celebrate its 25th anniversary. The $2,013 dish features two pounds of wild-caught lobster and sauteed organic vegetables. Well, that sounds fucking lame. Truffles? Veg? Lobster? Pshaw. Wonkers, we can do better. Read more on What Else Should Be On New York Restaurant’s $2000 Plate Of Pasta?…
  class traitors

Millionaire Joe Scarborough Class Wars ‘Rich People’

Wonketteers, did you know that the country is full of rich people with mansions and jets? And that these people are far richer than most Americans are or ever will be? Joe Scarborough knows a little something about wealth inequality — not because HE’s wealthy, but because he’s seen OTHER PEOPLE hoard vast quantities of wealth, and thinks — get this — it’s morally wrong. Spokesmodel Mika Brzezinski gets the ball rolling, asking something about “tax rates today, those who are impacting taxes [sic] are contrived in some way.” Was that a question? Apparently it was, because Morning Joe, wearing his most Serious looking spectacles this morning, explains why these concerns are NOT contrived. It is because in the ’90s, lowering taxes on capital gains was probably the “right” thing to do to stimulate growth, but now, it’s looking like it was NOT probably the right thing to do. Joe Scarborough doesn’t know anything about income inequality PERSONALLY, of course, since he lives such a humble existence on his $4 million per year salary. Read more on Millionaire Joe Scarborough Class Wars ‘Rich People’…
  a classless society

John Sununu: Barack Obama Is Pretty Much Pol Pot, Because ‘Government’

Favored Romney surrogate (because Mr. Manager Mitt Romney makes the greatest and classiest personnel decisions) John Sununu opened his wobbly old turkey mouth and said some more stupid shit today, because it is “a day.” Sure, His Lord High Hairgel got in a wee spot of bother by explaining exactly how 47 percent of the American populace can never be expected to take responsibility for themselves, because they are foul peasants, but Barack Obama is the real divider and class warrior, because he had a website saying government is cool. Read more on John Sununu: Barack Obama Is Pretty Much Pol Pot, Because ‘Government’…
  avon calling!

Texas Congressman Pete Olson Is Here to Defend Honor of America, Capitalism, Ladies’ Purse Parties

Question: is the American spirit of entrepreneurship, self-reliance, and rugged individualism so very very delicate that it can’t withstand the weight of a simple declarative sentence? Answer: yes. Yes it is. Luckily, many people, some of them idiots and most of them Republicans, have taken to the internets and airwaves to defend the honor of America, and FREEDOM! Like: this guy! Representative Pete Olson (R-Tex), who took time away from the Beef Caucus, the Rice Caucus, and the Diabetes Caucus (along with a bunch of other caucuses) to type a bunch of stuff for the Hill about entrepreneurial spirit and defend the honor of  those ladies who have purse parties. (No, seriously.) Because is Obama really saying that these nice ladies didn’t “build” their own purse party empires, and how DARE he? Read more on Texas Congressman Pete Olson Is Here to Defend Honor of America, Capitalism, Ladies’ Purse Parties…
  #occupywalmart

Wal-Mart’s Billions and the Art Museum of Cruelty: A Christmas Carol

Here is a number we’ve seen bouncing around this week that really makes us want to fire up the old Yule Log, in the sense that the “Yule Log” is a tightly bound human centipede of the richest hundred humans in America, lit on fire: The six heirs to the Wal-Mart fortune have about $93 billion between them, more money and financial assets than the combined 100,000,000 Americans at the bottom of our crushing economic system. With half of all Americans now officially poor or “near poor” — which is somehow worse than plain poverty, as “near poor” means you don’t qualify for the minimal safety net this country generously offers some of its most desperate people — it is not a complete surprise that the rich must be very rich indeed these days. But the idea of six heirs to a corporate fortune built upon the destruction of American manufacturing, American small business and the American working class owning more than 30% of the entire nation, well that is the kind of thing that makes us think of Charles Dickens, and the holiday of abject misery and constant war against the impoverished called “Christmastime.” Read more on Wal-Mart’s Billions and the Art Museum of Cruelty: A Christmas Carol…