Tag Archives: civil rights

  morning in gaymerica

Anti-Gay Bigots Accuse Attorney General Eric Holder Of Federal Over-Reach-Around On Gay Rights

Don’t look now, but marriage as we know it is crumbling. Seriously, the allure of man-on-dog-on-oak-tree action is running rampant, and Uncle Sam is doing nothing but encouraging these unnatural homosexual unions, and treating gay people like people, which is UNACCEPTABLE. Attorney General Eric Holder is pushing this ‘all men created equal’ bullshit even further, per The Hill: Attorney Gen. Eric Holder revealed Saturday that the Justice Department would issue a policy memo this week granting gay couples the ability to file jointly for bankruptcy and guaranteeing that married same–sex partners would not be forced to testify against each other in trial. The book of Revelations clearly states that the Apocalypse will be preceded by civilly married gay couples going broke and filling out paperwork for joint bankruptcy JUST LIKE STRAIGHT COUPLES DO. Repent! Or INPEACH! Or something. Let’s same-sexplore.  Read more on Anti-Gay Bigots Accuse Attorney General Eric Holder Of Federal Over-Reach-Around On Gay Rights…
  today in very bad analogies

President Of Creation Museum Is Just Like Oppressed Civil Rights Leaders Of 1950s Selma, Obviously

Attention civil rights activists! Your fierce and courageous devotion to fighting against injustice is sorely needed in the horribly oppressive town of San Diego, which has, sadly, turned into 1950s Alabama. No, there are no segregated drinking fountains. No, there have been no lynchings. No, there is no tired lady who would just like to have her seat on the bus, goddamnit. But there is a heinous, oppressive evil afoot, and we are not talking about former Mayor Bob Grabass Filner. We are talking about — trigger warning for atrocious atrocities of atrociousness — this: The president of a museum which teaches that dinosaurs walked the Earth at the same time as humans said this week that San Diego was “like Selma, Alabama in the 1950s” because his ministry was denied a seat on the local museum council. “I’m afraid we are being opposed for nothing more than the old prejudice against God,” [museum President Tom] Cantor lamented. Oh, the humanity! Read more on President Of Creation Museum Is Just Like Oppressed Civil Rights Leaders Of 1950s Selma, Obviously…
  slavery is freedom

Blogger May Wish To Rethink Calling Rep. John Lewis Disgraceful Slaver Who Turns Fire-Hose Of Obamacare On America

Some people get pretty worked up about Obamacare. Here, for instance, is Jeff Goldstein, the proud proprietor of ProteinWisdom.com, explaining to civil rights legend John Lewis that YUH HUH Obamacare IS TOO SLAVERY, and also that John Lewis is a “parasite” — you know who else called people “parasites”? — and a disgrace to the civil rights movement, and that he should go fuck himself. (We are going to skip past his assertion that the Tea Party fights for “the epistemology of the Enlightenment,” because it made our brain kill itself.) Here, look for yourself! You sir, are a disgrace to the civil rights movement, a disgrace to the seriousness of the historic fight for equal rights for blacks (led by Republicans), a disgrace to those you purport to represent, yet upon whose ignorance and perpetually stoked victimization you continue to prey. I despise people like you. You’ve turned a past injustice into a cottage race industry upon which you live like a parasite. And your attempts to tether that past injustice to those of us who today fight for the freedom and autonomy of the individual to resist the oppression of the state suggests that it is you, sir, who today carries the fire hoses and have shown yourself willing, time and again, to release the dogs against those who oppose your designs on their liberty. In short, you are an opportunistic relic who, your protestations to the contrary, has become a bane to the very progress of the people your purport to speak for. So go fuck yourself. You know what else was slavery? (No, not “slavery,” just this once.) Read more on Blogger May Wish To Rethink Calling Rep. John Lewis Disgraceful Slaver Who Turns Fire-Hose Of Obamacare On America…
  Cops of Cocktober

Philadelphia Cops Indicted For Violating Civil Rights, Being Gross Wankers

What up Philadelphia? Just all being the City of Brotherly Love, right? And what is more brotherly or loverly than Philadelphia cops busting into an abandoned house on a drug raid only to find some dude and his chick, high on speedballs and love, about to have sex? What to do? Well, if you are Joseph Harvey of the Philadelphia PD, right before arresting the lady you find there, you make her get all the way naked whilst you make a withdrawal from the spank-bank. Empty your gun barrel? Have a date with Palmela Handerson. Take Captain Solo on the Kessel Run? Okay, you masturbate. Onto the pants of the lady you are supposed to be arresting, because you are the good guy and she is the bad guy. Read more on Philadelphia Cops Indicted For Violating Civil Rights, Being Gross Wankers…
  hyperbole and a halfwit

Allen West Wishes Barack Obama Would Try Being More Black For A Change

Professional conservative victim Allen West took to Fox News yesterday to condemn the incredible insensitivity and unspeakable atrocity of a “despicable, demeaning, and disgusting” email by Florida congressman Alan Grayson that compared the Tea Party to the KKK. West, whose job is to condemn all liberals for mentioning racism until it’s time for him to proclaim himself the victim of a racist attack, recalled how terrified he was as a young black man growing up in the South, and wondered why civil rights leaders hadn’t condemned Grayson for his dumb hyperbole, because an exaggerated comparison of the Tea Party to the KKK is apparently exactly the same as the actual KKK burning a cross or bombing a church. Read more on Allen West Wishes Barack Obama Would Try Being More Black For A Change…
  i have been to the mountaintop and it is out of network

Civil Rights Legend Ted Yoho Vows To Honor MLK And Rosa Parks By Killing Obamacare

Rep. Ted Yoho (R-Duh) is turning out to be the great civil rights leader of our generation. He is stalwart in his freedom-fighting against the reverse racism of Obamacare, argle bargling truth to power, standing up for the rights of the Taxed Enough AlreadyTM melatonin-deficient. And do you know why? No, it is not because he is a typical Republican who hates that Kenyan-born usurper-in-chief O’Lame-o. (Well, okay, that is why, actually, but he can’t just say that, that would sound crazy!) Read more on Civil Rights Legend Ted Yoho Vows To Honor MLK And Rosa Parks By Killing Obamacare…
  no really never read the comments

Terrible New Orleans Prosecutors Behave Terribly And Ensure That Terrible New Orleans Cops Get New Trial

Would you rather start your day out with sadness or rage? Fortunately, thanks to the New Orleans Police Department and the United States Department of Justice, you can have both! Yay? Back in 2011, five of NOPD’s not-finest were finally FINALLY convicted for stone cold murdering unarmed people for the extreme crime of heading to the grocery store during Hurricane Katrina. Not only did they go all murder-y, they also engaged in an immediate and epic coverup. They were first prosecuted at the state level, which ended up being a ginormous cock-up. The feds took over and finally secured the convictions, all of which were tossed Tuesday on account of just how badly the DOJ attorneys behaved during the whole thing. Read more on Terrible New Orleans Prosecutors Behave Terribly And Ensure That Terrible New Orleans Cops Get New Trial…
  not quite at the mountaintop

Laura Ingraham Frets: Liberals Are Trying To Act Like Martin Luther King Was Some Liberal Or Something

Amoebic dysentery vector Laura Ingraham celebrated the 50th anniversary of the March on Washington for Jobs and Freedom yesterday by chatting with Pat Buchanan about black-on-white crime, fretting that liberals were stealing the legacy of Martin Luther King, and cutting off a recording of a speech by civil rights hero John Lewis with the sound of a gunshot. But don’t worry about that last one, it was only a joke! Ingraham was very unhappy with Saturday’s march celebrating the anniversary of the 1963 event, complaining that its goal “was to co-opt the legacy of Martin Luther King into a modern-day liberal agenda,” because as everyone knows, Martin Luther King was really a conservative Republican who gave a beautiful anti-affirmative action speech that consisted of a single line about his dream that one day people would be judged not by the color of their skin, but by the content of their character. Read more on Laura Ingraham Frets: Liberals Are Trying To Act Like Martin Luther King Was Some Liberal Or Something…
  from the archives

History Nice Time: Jean Shepherd On The Radio Right After The March On Washington

Hey, media and history nerds! With this week’s 50th anniversary of the 1963 March On Washington For Jobs and Freedom coming up Wednesday, we’re happy to share the great radio guy Jean Shepherd’s first-person account of being in the march, broadcast just the day after the event. It’s pretty cool: rambling and digressive, but such a vivid account of being one guy in the middle of an experience that he knew was going to be world-changing. And it’s a valuable reminder that the march involved so much more than just the “I Have a Dream” speech. It’s also just an interesting artifact of how radio used to work — a full two-minute opening song with no voice-over? No edits? No call-in segment? Weird. Read more on History Nice Time: Jean Shepherd On The Radio Right After The March On Washington…
  the arc of the moral universe is long but it bends toward shooting

Dana Loesch Says Dana Loesch Is Your New Martin Luther King, America

Yesterday we mentioned the presence of sniveling rage sack Dana Loesch at this weekend’s “A Farewell to Arms” rally in Colorado. What we did not get around to discussing was the speech this great orator delivered, which is too bad because it sounds as if it was quite the stemwinder. Did you know that Dana Loesch is some sort of civil rights hero? It’s true! She was on Twitter all day Monday refusing to shut the fuck up about it! Set the scene for us, Raw Story: Appearing at a Colorado gun show and rally on Saturday supporting the recall election of gun control advocate and state Senate President John Morse (D), Republican blogger and Internet radio host Dana Loesch took the stage with a unique, weaponized cover of Dr. Martin Luther King, Jr.’s “I Have A Dream” speech. Oh good, there is nothing we like more than the wingnuts’ continued equating of the long struggle for civil rights for African-Americans with their own desire to amass goddamn arsenals of killing machines. Gun ownership is a civil right, dontcha know. Maybe we should pile some bubble wrap on this desk before we go any further. Read more on Dana Loesch Says Dana Loesch Is Your New Martin Luther King, America…
  deleted comments of note

Deleted Comment Of The Day: If We Were Really Progressive We’d Hate Blacks And Mexicans?

Oh, well this is … what is the opposite of fun? It is that. Let us think of some words for that: Gross. It is gross. And sad. And icky. And yuck! Oh, at first we assumed it was just some Occupy kids calling us out for our undying love of the Droner in Chief, which: fair enough! We voted for Nader (twice!), and it appeared to have some consequences to it! So now we are pretty much “DON’T CARE” if the Dems are corporatist moneyslurpers or love to bomb people from very far away, we are reasonably okay with that! But, no, “unperson192″ had more to say, in a comment that he (he, right?) typed from the ether straight to our moderation panel, and it seemed to boil down to: if we claim to love the poor, we will help get rid of blacks and Mexicans. Huh. Read more on Deleted Comment Of The Day: If We Were Really Progressive We’d Hate Blacks And Mexicans?…
  randsplaining

What Was Your Favorite Part Of Rand Paul’s ‘History Of Democrat Racism’ At Historically Black Howard University?

Today, Senator Rand Paul liked himself a lot when he was either “brave” or “crazy” enough to venture into the Heart of Blackness that is historically black Howard University and lay down some TRUTH like that Republicans have always loved civil rights and more TRUTH like that he has always been in favor of the Civil Rights Act. He said some funny jokes too, like that there might be some Democrats in the room. That was funny, Rand Paul! Good for you! But what did you, the Wonkadoodles, like best about his speech? Read more on What Was Your Favorite Part Of Rand Paul’s ‘History Of Democrat Racism’ At Historically Black Howard University?…
  dear shit-fer-brains

Civil Rights Activist Mark Traina Would Like To Know: Is Your Wonkette A ‘Jewish Dyke’?

Last May, we brought you the news that the schoolchildren of Jefferson Parish, Louisiana, were the luckiest schoolchildren in the whole wide world, because their school psychologist, Mark A. Traina, was tweeting awesome stuff about how black children should be “put down like dogs,” and also that he is not a racist. Well apparently the Internet has just come to Louisiana, because Mark A. Traina, or as we like to think of him “Postracial Amercia Exhibit A,” has climbed out of his bourbon barrel and has a question for your Wonket: Read more on Civil Rights Activist Mark Traina Would Like To Know: Is Your Wonkette A ‘Jewish Dyke’?…
  Strong Men Also Cry...

Obama Sends Letter To Girl Who Wrote To Him About Her Two Dads That Will Not Make You Cry At All

As if we needed more reminders of the differences between the candidates in this here election, think about how Mitt “Do teh gheys even have famblies?” Romney might reply* to a letter from a 10-year-old girl who writes a letter to the President about her two gay dads: I am so glad that you agree two men can love each other because I have two dads and they love each other, but at school kids think that it’s gross and weird, but it really hurts my heart and feelings…. If you were me and you had two dads that loved each other and kids at school teased you about it, what would you do? Read more on Obama Sends Letter To Girl Who Wrote To Him About Her Two Dads That Will Not Make You Cry At All…
  slow news day?

John Lewis, Dance Machine

It is nice to see the civil rights legend and American treasure with his boogie shoes on. Especially considering we usually just write about him when hordes of Teabaggers have been showing their colors. [Via AngryBlackLady] Read more on John Lewis, Dance Machine…
  cocktober

Attorney For Pat Robertson’s Anti-Gay Legal Outfit Fired For Alleged Wide Stance With (Possibly) Under-Age Boys

Oh look, a poorly produced video about some guy named “Jim,” a.k.a “our bitch who got us drunk.” (No, not Jim Newell, although we will make him our bitch and let him get us drunk if he asks nicely.) This video is about Jim Henderson, formerly a senior attorney at the American Center for Law and Justice (ACLJ), who was fired by Pat Robertson’s outfit last week for “maybe” being gay. Read more on Attorney For Pat Robertson’s Anti-Gay Legal Outfit Fired For Alleged Wide Stance With (Possibly) Under-Age Boys…
  the south shall rise again

Your Post-Racial America: Civil Rights Hero’s Grandson Suing For Constantly Being Called ‘N-Word’ At Work

Do you remember how you cried and cried during Obama’s victory speech, particularly in the part about thousand-year-old civil rights hero Ann Nixon Cooper casting her vote for one Barry Q. Bamz? You can watch it right above, because we at Wonket are Not Afraid to Be Servicey! Now, how would you feel if that civil rights hero’s grandson, Michael Cooper, was filing a lawsuit against his used car lot employers for constantly calling him the “n-word,” and threatening to shove his teeth down his throat for showing them in the presence of a white man, and paying other employees cash under the table to racially harass him so he would quit, and ordering him to tell other people that he was indeed the boss’s n-word? Which he did? And that the other employees had testified they were being paid cash to harass him? Would you feel like Michael Cooper was cloggin’ up the courts with his frivolous lawsuits? Would you feel like Michael Cooper should have been grateful he had a job in the first place? What if they’d already fired him and he didn’t have a job? And then when he went to get unemployment, they fought him on it, saying he’d been let go for being “untruthful”? And what if the employer’s opening salvo after being served with Cooper’s lawsuit was to defame him in court as some kind of disgusting disability fraudster criminal, even though he wasn’t? Who is the defendant’s attorney, James O’Keefe? Congratulations, America, Everything Is Terrible! Read more on Your Post-Racial America: Civil Rights Hero’s Grandson Suing For Constantly Being Called ‘N-Word’ At Work…
  the negro problem

Texas Totally Over This Whole Voting Rights Act Thing, Y’all

Howdy, Merka! Big ol’ state o’ Texas don’t care to get told nothin’ no more from no Justice Department sumbitches yehaa an’ ‘cetera. That’s why they’re takin’ a breather from breakin’ their fillies and havin’ a gander at what they can do ’bout their nigra and Messican problems instead. First up, they maybe wouldn’t like ’em to vote so much, an’ if the D-O-J got a problem with it, the D-O-J knows where it can go! Texas AG Greg Abbott wants to take the Department of Justice all the way up to the Soopreme Court about it, and he’s got a right-purty new argument: The Voting Rights Act is un-Constitootional, that’s what, and nobody tellin’ him no different! Read more on Texas Totally Over This Whole Voting Rights Act Thing, Y’all…
  good news

Gay Marriage Passes in Maryland; Twitter Awaits Santorum’s Reaction

The Maryland Senate passed a bill allowing same-sex marriage that the House also passed last week, which the governor will now sign shortly, hooray! This makes Maryland the first state with a direct reference to Catholicism in its name to legalize gay marriage and the eighth state to do so overall, which immediately forced Virginia to also advance an anti-gay adoption bill today as a bulwark against common sense spreading any further south of the Mason-Dixon line. Twitter, meanwhile, is growing agitated that Rick Santorum has not yet issued a reaction that is gravely offensive to the basic principles of decency for it to mock. Come on, he did it for the Ninth Circuit ruling against California’s Proposition 8! Did someone forget to put another quarter in the squawking toy clown’s butt? Read more on Gay Marriage Passes in Maryland; Twitter Awaits Santorum’s Reaction…
  post-racism today

Ohio Woman Says ‘Whites Only’ Pool Sign She Put Up Merely ‘Historical’

What are the racist loonballs up to in …let’s see, Ohio this time? Sure, why not give Arizona a quick break? Antiques-collecting landlord lady Jamie Hein of Cincinnati is apparently the sort of person who came to mind when someone wanted to gift a 1931 sign from Alabama that reads “Public Swimming Pool, White Only.” Luckily enough, she found a perfect place to hang it! On the gate to her pool, right after the African-American daughter of one of her tenants went swimming in it. No big deal, she said, because “I’m not a bad person. I don’t have any problem with race at all. It’s a historical sign.” HMMM. Isn’t “history” more like the precise reason why this was a bad idea? Read more on Ohio Woman Says ‘Whites Only’ Pool Sign She Put Up Merely ‘Historical’…
  just like marcus bachmann did

Michele Bachmann Kindly Offers To Let Gays Get Straight Married

Just to clarify: Michele Bachmann isn’t offering to let gays get married in the same way straight people do, she’s offering to let gays marry people of the opposite sex if they feel the need to be able to get hitched so badly. This is how “civil rights” works, according to someone with a mail-order law degree. “[Gay people] can get married,” she says, “But they abide by the same law as everyone else. They can marry a man if they’re a woman. Or they can marry a woman if they’re a man.” So many options! Read more on Michele Bachmann Kindly Offers To Let Gays Get Straight Married…
  hard to believe

Bored Immigration Agents Now Also Trying To Deport U.S. Citizens

It doesn’t really seem terribly equitable for Immigration and Customs Enforcement agents to only be feverishly deporting thousands and thousands of undocumented dark-skinned residents all the time now, does it? And America is about nothing if not fairness! So to keep things “even,” ICE has been steadily trying to kick out thousands of U.S. citizens like Jamaican-American Anthony Clarke, who according to a Star Tribune report was arrested and mysteriously detained for months for the deportation-level offense of being a dark-skinned man living in a nation full of incompetent/corrupt/lazy law enforcement agents. Read more on Bored Immigration Agents Now Also Trying To Deport U.S. Citizens…