Wonkette

The New York Times has a delightful round-up of all the godawful campaign merchandise offered by all the leading presidential candidates… and Ron Paul, too! Soon all the kids will be wearing McCain hoodies, Obama baby-doll tees and Giuliani baseball jerseys. Our favorites by far are the extensive wares offered by Mike Huckabee’s shop, a dizzying array of merchandise featuring superb graphics meant to appeal to his followers’ lack of grammar skills (”a.Huck.i.be”) and love of flop existential Hollywood comedies (”I [Heart] Huckabee”). MORE »

A couple of days ago, the Chris Dodd presidential campaign tried to cash in on Red Sox Nation insanity with this seemingly innocuous ploy (via MassLive):

There’s something magical about playoff baseball under the shadow of the Green Monster, the Citgo sign in Kenmore Square, or the fact that if you squint hard enough you can almost make out Ted Williams patrolling the outfield or Cartlon Fisk waving that ball inside the foul pole.

So let’s go to Fenway Park… I’ve got two extra seats — great seats — to Game Six of the American League Championship Series against the Cleveland Indians. And I believe they have your name on them.

Next Thursday at 5 P.M. Eastern, we’re going to pick one entrant at random, live and online, to attend Game Six with me that Saturday. I’ll put up the two tickets, $600 towards airfare for you and your guest, and a hotel room in Boston.

Here’s how it works. You make a minimum contribution of $20.04 (in honor of the last time the Red Sox won the World Series, 2004) and you have as good a shot as anyone else to attend the game.

We didn’t post at the time because, hey, Wonkette is not a message board for Chris Dodd to make new friends, especially if he doesn’t offer a big bowl of chips! Major League Baseball apparently felt used also, and has ordered the Dodd campaign to stop the promotion at once. Ruh roh. MORE »

* A primer for politicians on how to cover-up their humorless sycophantic nature for five minutes while on teevee. [Politico]
* It’s impossible to read a Ted Kennedy post without hearing the slurring in your head. [HuffPo]
* Hillary campaign blogger’s background is so top secret it doesn’t even say “top secret” when Googled. [Election Central]
* Sean Hannity knows that “teachers are more dangerous than Al Qaeda.” Stay tuned tonight to learn how kittens and their yarn balls are destroying American values. [Think Progress]
* The Politico says Barack and Michelle (”Barchelle”) are as nice as those pretend colored people from The Cosby Show. [Politics.Wikia]
* Voters don’t care if a President loves the cock, pretty adamant about loving the Jesus. [Political Arithmetik]
* In Connecticut, Christopher Dodd gets a silver medal for futility — McCain takes Gold. [The Swamp]

* Rupert Murdoch shoots lightning bolts from his various “news” outlets at Hillary, mumbles something about her paying for “lack of vision.” [Radar]
* Hillary betrayed by a pant suit. Hotline on Call]
* Rush Limbaugh’s favorite place to eat in DC is same as Treasury Department employees’ favorite place to score coke. [Media Matters]
* Christopher Dodd sends any old bullshit to the FEC, they’re just an “accounting thing” anyway. [Political Insider]
* FBI says any old bullshit to the media, they’re just an accountability thing anyway. [TPM Muckraker]
* Department of Homeland Security remembers to give SOTU the same security rating as the Super Bowl. [Suitably Flip]
* Military’s new bunker-buster bomb has a pretty sweet porno name. [Military & Aerospace Electronics]
* TPM Muckraker Justin Rood bolting for ABC’s The Blotter & Brian Ross’ pretend phone. [TPM]

* Lawmakers follow through: everyone who said they intended to be against President Bush’s “new” Iraq plan seemingly still is. [WP, NYT]
* Weekend news shows to resemble shopping channel, if you’re in the market for a half-assed war plan. [USAT]
* US Embassy in Athens hit by bubble and squeak terrorists. [WP, NYT]
* Democrats get a mile high, chose Denver for 2008 convention. [WP, NYT]
* New stem cell bill gets House members ready to “booze up and riot.” [NYT]
* Christopher Dodd announces his last place Presidential run on last place radio show. [WP]
* Jews take over congress! [WP]
* White House gets around to thinking about maybe having trials for terror detainees. [NYT]

* Don’t forget, starting January 1 no more indentured servants in New Hampshire. [Washington Wire]
* Traditional children’s Christmas poem reimagined, with skinny kid instead of little round belly. [Hotline on Call]
* Bill O’Reilly has fond memories of all the things Liberace had. [Media Matters]
* Guys who think legalized abortion stops criminals before they happen really like Tom DeLay’s blog. [Freakonomics]
* If Christopher Dodd actually believes hiring Kerry’s ‘04 campaign manager will win him the nomination, he’s not winning the nomination. [The Swamp]
* Death of Turkmeni dictator could allow for new American military base near the Iranian border, so that’s convenient. [Think Progress, The Economist]
* Jimmy Carter not racist, just baby racist, diet racist, racist light — like a racist drink with too many ice cubes. [The Volokh Conspiracy]
* The skeleton in Bill Richardson’s closet wears a blue dress. [Wizbang Politcs]