Tag: chris christie

This fucking guy

Surprise! ‘Chris Christie Is A Lying Liar Who Lies About Stuff!’ Love, His Staff

UH OH! It looks as though Donald Trump's faithful manservant, Chris Christie, might be in a spot of bother, again!

Jill Stein And That Weird Dilbert Guy Walk Into A Bar: Your Weekly Top Ten!

YOU COME READ THESE STORIES RIGHT NOW!

Jilted Lover Chris Christie Takes Trump’s Name In Vain, Gonna Get A Spankin’

Somebody is still upset about losing the VP slot to that sexy vixen Mike Pence.

Meghan McCain Wishes RNC Hadn’t Given Hillary That Sexxxy Tongue Bath

Meghan McCain was really disappointed the GOP Convention was so friendly to Hillary Clinton. Hmm.

Wonkagenda: Thursday, 7/21/2016

Ted Cruz shit the bed last night when he spoke at the Republican National Convention and didn't endorse Trump. SPOILER ALERT: Everybody.Hates.Ted Cruz. Donald Trump gave an interview to the New York Times where he said he'd only...
Stoled from Twitters, will credit if we find out what magnificent bastard did this.

Mike Pence To Handle A Bit More Than Typical Veep, Like ‘Domestic Policy And Foreign Policy’

It's a good thing Mike Pence isn't a power-hungry jerk. At least we hope he isn't because if Donald Trump wins in November, Pence will run things while Trump golfs.
Secretary Clinton's 2:00 appointment is here

Ben Carson Saw Goody Clinton Dancing With The Devil

At the RNC Tuesday, Ben Carson took a little time away from his prepared text to explain that Hillary Clinton is an acolyte of a man who literally worshiped Satan. We can't say we agree 100 percent with his police work there.

RNC Night Two: Chris Christie Persecutes, Er, Prosecutes The Witch

New Jersey's failed vice presidential candidate took his snub in stride (again) last night by pitching a fit at the Republican National Convention. Governor Chris Christie led the convention in a call and response speech that was designed to...
We can hardly wait for the scene where she learns shit from Shinola.

Melania Trump Copied Michelle Obama’s Homework. Trump Camp Says You Didn’t See What You Just Saw

Melania Trump lifted from Michelle Obama's 2008 convention speech. Now let's imagine Michelle Obama had cribbed from Laura Bush.
Add your own Darth Vader "Noooooo" SFX

Donald Trump Names Mike Pence As His One True Veep, Newt Gingrich Sulking On The Moon

Donald Trump has named Mike Pence as his running mate. Pour out a 40 and a bag of Doritos for all the Newt and Chris Christie jokes that might have been.
If you immediately knew it was a Checker Marathon airport limo you may be a nerd

Who’ll Be Piling Out Of The Clown Car At The Republican Convention? Not Sarah Palin, Somehow!

Let's run down the list of speakers at the 2016 Republican National Convention, before they can run US down.
Donald Trump uses Awkward Handshake! It's not very effective!

Donald Trump Seen Leaving Mike Pence’s Place In Last Night’s Dress

Donald Trump is one fickle veep-vetter. His short list keeps getting longer and longer, which is not supposed to be how that works.

Look At All The Beautiful White People On Donald Trump’s VP Short List!

Yep, it's basically a bunch of dumb crackers. Oh, and Ben Carson.

Lindsey Graham Two Jameson Shots Away From Shrieking, ‘I’m With Her, Y’all!’

Lindsey Graham is APPALLED, we tell you, APPALLED, by Donald Trump's impolite racism!
Same as it ever was, same as it ever was...

New Jersey Likes Indicted Senator Crook Man Better Than Chris Christie. Hmmmmm!

Chris Christie is less popular in New Jersey than the state legislature, an indicted senator, and the zika virus. We made one of those up, but it might still be true.