china
Sundays With The Christianists: A ‘World History’ Book That’s Ready For Apocalypse, Now
Well, time tourists, we have made it to our final visit to our 10th grade textbook for homeschoolers, World History and Cultures In Christian Perspective. This post will be a bit longish, because there’s a whole lot of crazy to cover between the fall of the USSR and the end of the world, but we [...]
Sure, Here Are Michelle Obama And Ann Romney In A Chinese Condom Ad, Because Why Not
Is this Chinese ad for Durex condoms, featuring Michelle Obama and Egg Romney, real? We think so! And that is good enough for us. [e.weibo.com]
Protesting Now Illegal, Basically
Look at what the freedom-hating Chinese government has done! They’ve gone and passed a law saying that it is illegal to enter a “restricted” area even if you didn’t know that the space was restricted, and also made it illegal to protest in said “restricted” area or do anything that could be “disruptive,” like booing. [...]
The United Nations Needs James Bond To Save The Day
The UN is not doing its job right, jobs are becoming more neurotic, and Chinese bureaucrats are apparently the James Bonds of the East. Plus, it’s my last day! Rio+20 is not doing well and it’s making the United Nations look bad because more people are dying from pollution and impure water than climate change. [...]
American Birth Control Mandate To Lead To Communist Chinese One-Child Policy! Everybody Panic!
Hey ladies! How’s your womb? Is it fruitful? No? What about now? Is it fruitful yet? Well are you even TRYING? It is your job to fill your stomach with tiny babies, a Quiver full of babies even, and if you do not want, say, 19 babies, then you are a heathen Communist Chinee. That [...]
China Bravely Sending Woman Into Space Only 49 Years After Other Countries Did It
Chinese state media reported this week that the search for the country’s first female astronaut will culminate this month in her joining a team being sent to a Chinese space lab. It is not clear whether they will bother trying to get the woman back to Earth afterward. The move is a great leap forward [...]
China Didn’t Want Those Dumb American Jobs Anyway
Your morning news: this time with a main dish of weird news that Americans have finally begun stealing jobs back from China, a side of old news (yeah, yeah, Bush is annoying) and a dessert of future news (everyone’s going to be on Facebook soon!). America is actually stealing jobs from China. Someone explain this [...]
The Wonkette Geopoliticker: U.S. Plotting Nostalgic Military Return To Vietnam
When Obama said our military would leave the Middle East and focus on the Pacific Region, he probably wasn’t kidding. Secretary of Defense Leon Panetta was in Vietnam the other day laying the groundwork for what will be America’s most important harbor (a fancy deep-water harbor, at that!) when it comes to circling our number [...]
GOP Congressman Calls China Government a Bunch of Hitlers
Whose turn is it to play Adolf Hitler today in the forever binary saga of the Republicans versus secret zombie Adolf Hitler come back from the dead disguised as (insert ridiculous noun here) to devour hysterical conservatives? This kitten? Mitt Romney’s spell-checker? Or maybe some elementary school teachers? For the answer, let’s either re-read the [...]
Comical California Mayor Gives This Chinese Autograph Seeker a Piece of His Mind
Santee, California Mayor Randy Voepel, according to the local Patch, recently received an email from a Chinese fellow who collects autographs asking for a contribution from Voepel. The email sort of resemnbles “spam email,” but we’re only saying that because we’re racist. But instead of deleting the email or not responding or, well, sending him [...]
Like A Good Neighbor, Bill Clinton Is There
Romney puts his foot in his mouth, Amazon and Apple get dirty, and China hates Kanye West. What else is new? Romney creates an app that misspells America. He just makes it so easy, doesn’t he? [Mashable] Amazon and Apple have the “dirtiest” “clouds,” according to Greenpeace. The more the world changes, the more it [...]
Rep. Walter Jones Is Sick Of Borrowing War Money From ‘Uncle Chang’
North Carolina Rep. Walter Jones, Ron Paul’s fellow anti-everything old crank who’s occasionally right, is sick of the Afghanistan war, like the vast majority of Americans and people everywhere. But did you even know, like Walter Jones knows, that some guy in China named “Uncle Chang” is paying for the whole thing?
Paultards Hate Huntsman for Knowing Chinese, Adopting Foreigners
The New Hampshire contingent of Paultards is stooping to core-of-the-earth lows today with a new ad featuring Napster-era audio quality, proof alone that the ad was definitely not made by Paul’s official moneybags campaign, but the freaks on the fringe of the fringe, who are still learning how to use a computer. In the ad, [...]
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