children’s treasury

Hoooray it is White House Flickr Update Day! Just be sure to come out of your bunk in time to see Steve Cohen’s press conference regarding his deleted Cyndi Lauper tweet, 1 p.m. Eastern, because that shit is gonna be cray.

Say, did you notice that Joe Biden was just a little interrupty in the VP Debate? We are given to understand that Old Handsome Joe’s performance made a bit of a stir among some of the more sensitive souls on the right side of the political spectrum. (You see, when a Republican puts on an [...]

Wonkette Operative “obfuscator2″ sends us this thrilling account of rabid Wisconsin Union Thugz being unacceptably Radical, with their “peaceably assembling.” Hello, you vile leftists! This photo was taken a few hours ago outside the Abraham Lincoln Hotel in Springfield, Illinois (EVERYTHING in Springfield is named after honest abe. Except for the gay bars, ironically).

Oh oh what to “be” for Halloween this year, tomorrow, when the big party happens somewhere? This is an annual problem for America’s infantile, sexually repressed adults — when you aren’t “being anything” during the rest of the year but a consumer schlub scared to death of getting fired from a job you deeply hate [...]

While regular people are suffering through power outages, severe flooding, wind damage and a shutdown of public transportation along the whole Eastern Seaboard, reports on Sunday indicate that the The Devil spared his main temples on Earth, from His graven image of a golden bull outside His banks on Wall Street to the unholy trinity [...]

Oh hooray, there is a new Internet Meme, just in time to Make the Internet Laugh Again, during this era of gloom and strife and unspeakable bullshit. Mr. Spock is a demon from the not-actually-popular television melodrama Star Trek, which was a cultural contemporary of the Sid & Marty Kroft show H.R. Pufnstuf and The [...]

Hey, everybody found America’s First Dentist Orly Taitz. “In those days nobody wrote African as a race, it just wasn’t one of the options. It sounds like it would be written today, in the age of political correctness, and not in 1961 when they wrote white or Asian or ‘Negro,’” she said. Aha! So even [...]

Today was probably our last day at CPAC, an awful concentration camp of concentrated awfulness. But every winding Ron Paul book-signing line has to end somewhere, and we’re sure these folks are glad to be rid of us too. So here’s the last account of this crap, starring George Allen, Pam Geller, and a Joe [...]

Above, your editor tries his hand at using a real revolutionary-era copper dicking pot this kindly Teabagger was carrying around his belt. Unfortunately, this man was the only one who got the memo about it being Halloween, but in case our government finally turns back the clock to whenever this (albeit probably incorrect and anachronistic) [...]

Hey look, there’s Sharron Angle! She refused to answer our questions about the future of makeup and what it means for the War in Afghanistan. Aww! Anyway, we just got here, but we’ve found plenty of weirdos and such for your enjoyment.

Remember when those people opposed to the “Ground Zero Mosk” embarrassed our country over the summer, and then the international news media moved on? They didn’t, apparently, and now they have come to the next front in their epic battle to bring xenophobia to New York City: finding famous people who supported the right of [...]

Sarah Palin has wished all American Jews a happy Hanukkah on Facebook, because all good Christians know being nice to Jews, despite them being wrong about Jesus, is how you earn special been-nice-to-Jews coupons you can spend in heaven. Most commenters understand this and tried to one-up one another with stories of how they honor [...]

Barack Obama just gave Rahm Emanuel a hearty kick in the ass, and Rahm rolled right out the door of the White House and into the trunk of Air Force Thug, the special Chicago mob car they use to travel back and forth to their home city, using a bootleggers’ tunnel that runs beneath the [...]

Last night (which is last Sunday, in the Alaska time zone), Sarah Palin put up a Facebook message coming out against the burning of Korans by that nobody pastor. But wait, doesn’t she usually bait her followers and their hatred of Muslins? This made many of them VERY ANGRY. How can the queen of dumb [...]

Multiple tipsters have sent us this fun Internet adventure: type “mosk” into Openbook, which shows you status updates of people who are too dumb to put any privacy setting on their Facebook account. EVIL LIBRULS have caught on to this, because quite a few of the results of this are now people saying, “Hey, go [...]


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