Greetings from Austin, Minnesota — the home of Hormel’s famous SPAM food product, which Hawaiians such as Barack Obama eat a dozen times a day, with caviar. We are very close to St. Paul and our fancy suites, and will be there Sunday morning in time for so many cocktail parties. The question is this: Will anybody from the Republican Party show up? MORE »

Republicans have “re-branded” themselves as the party of simpering pansies, forcing Democrats to sack up and occasionally act like men.

The big scary NFL quarterback on the left is new congressman Heath Shuler, D-Southern football monster, while the chirping dandy on the right is far-right draft-dodging Texas representative Louis Gohmert, who was skipping past Shuler’s offices Wednesday night when he saw something he wanted: a sign illustrating the deficit and how deep we’re all in the hole.

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